It doesn't matter what works for friends. All that matters is what works for you and we're all so different, which explains why there are so many options right here on this very group.
I completely understand the negative mindset. I don't even know what I weigh because after hitting my goal last year, I quickly regained a huge chunk of the weight. I had some starts and major stalls that involved binges that wouldn't stop for months....not only at night...all day long. Last Monday, I decided that was it. I decided that I would go back to what worked before (counting calories and exercising/moving). If I wanted to binge, I ran to the mirror and actually begged myself not to do it (silly, but it helped). I've also cut down on sugar and have been eating fermented food as well as drinking fermented liquids all in an effort to be more health conscious. It was kind of ****-ish at first but I'm feeling so much better. The hardest part is really letting it all click.
As silly as it sounds, every time you have a negative thought, replace it with a positive one. Sit down and write down all the things that are wonderful about you and be super detailed. Then, use those things when you need to because when we're feeling negative, it's hard to think of anything positive. Then, the more you do this, the better you'll (hopefully) feel and the less you'll want to stuff your body with junk.
First goal: under 180:
Second goal: 175 or below:
Third goal: 168 (no longer overweight):
Fourth goal: 160 or below:
Final goal: 145-155 (not sure if this will ever happen):