Return of the LGBT Chicks...
 

Apparently the first thread of this kind was closed, though I can't tell why, there don't appear to be any inflammatory posts on there...so I'm starting another one! BWAHAHA!

....Yes, I assure you that I'm sane...:carrot:

Anyway, I'm a proud pansexual and/or queer chick residing in Southern California, where it seems like everyone in the LGBT community is either a thin high femme, a skinny twinkish gay boy, or a ripped muscle man type. Some diversity, but always thin, and often rude or outright nasty to not-so-thin tomboyish queer punx like me. : /

I know you all are out there somewhere... ; )

xoxo
Alyss

It looks like it was closed for being ancient (sometimes we'll close threads if no one has posted in them for a long time because people bringing up very old threads can mean old information, answering questions to original posters who have since moved on, etc), not for any kind of wrongdoing.

Happily married gay woman here from CA (we got in the pre-prop-8 window).

LGBT chick here! From Minneapolis. :wave:

Gay Chick here from Oregon, also very new to the website. I am not high femme, nor do I dress like a boi... Im very much down the middle. I have some pounds to lose and be healthy!

Bisexual woman living happily with a bisexual man here. I thought the old LGBT thread was great, though I was a bit taken aback by the "I'm bi and my husband should therefore feel honoured to have me" statements, which didn't really make sense to me. The main difference I've noticed with being with another bisexual is a) I don't get any flak about my sexual orientation (of course, the relationships in which I did get flak were not good ones), and b) equal opportunity ogling of actors on TV, we can tease each other about our taste in men or one of us will say, "What did they say? I was distracted by the cleavage," and the other will reply, "No idea, so was I!"

Out of curiosity, are there any poly folks here? I'm monogamous myself but I have a few friends living happily in triads and so forth.

Esofia, I think its great you and your husband are both bi and can relate to what each other say and feel! I have never known a bi girl thats husband understood that.

Seriously? People get married with that sort of gap? Anyway, thanks, and I've known a few other bisexual women with non-bi partners who were absolutely fine about it. (Well, I think one partner in question is mostly straight rather than entirely, but then that's a polyamorous group anyway so you'd expect them to be sensible about such matters.) We're not actually married, I remain properly alternative in that fashion, the institution of marriage has never appealed to me personally. By the way, I absolutely roared with laughter when someone on a thread in this forum asked what DH meant, and said that Urban Dictionary was bringing up "dickhead" but it couldn't possibly be that!

But yes, I've found that there's no real reason why sexual orientation should be a thing unless someone has a problem with it. We've both had former partners who were twits about it, and frankly they just needed to grow up (and in one case, possibly come out of the closet). It's really not a particularly interesting factor in our lives, and I was serious when I said that about the main way it impacts us is that we can playfully argue about whether or not Brad Pitt is hot. (He says yes, I say no, and a friend of mine says, "But Brad Pitt is the one the straight boys make an exception for!")

lol thats awesome.... Depends what character Brad is playing... Mr. Smith...or Benjamin Button....

Bisexual woman here married to a heterosexual man. Hello all!

I am actually quite excited i found this site and this thread. For some reason I am more as comfortable talking about issues or things from weight loss to whatever else talking to LGBT people!

Hello everyone! I am a bisexual woman living with my boyfriend. He is very understanding and kind of likes it because I really get along with his male friends. They don't feel the need to censor themselves around me. It's kind of nice. I've always been interested in both sexes. It was never a taboo thing for me because my parents have gay friends. I went to high school in a very republican area of California and had to be one of the people that paved the way for the younger classes. It was worth it.

Hello, everyone! Great to see this thread! I am a bisexual woman married to an amazing heterosexual man. Seriously, he is amazing-he definitely understands how I feel and accepts me truly, and honestly, it's a lot more fun for both of us that way. We both check out beautiful girls at times, and that is really fun. Our mutual male friends also appreciate my appreciation for beauty, which is also cool. I don't have really many female friends to speak of, though I do have a few, but I rarely discuss it with people I don't absolutely trust IRL, and so my male friends are really the only ones I usually discuss it with besides hubby. Once, I did have someone say to me though after stating I was bisexual and proud of it, that I was married and therefore couldn't be bisexual. They said I'd obviously made my choice-but I don't understand that because I chose the person to be in love with-but that doesn't mean that a married person can only be attracted to one type of sex/gender. Hubby really does understand me and my feelings about people, and I am so glad he has never said anything like that to me. I hate being compartmentalized because of vague assumptions. Anyway, I am so glad to meet you all.

fatferretfanatic - I really hate when people say that because I have a boyfriend that I can't be bi! It's like saying, "Oh, you're wife is blonde, so you're only attracted to blondes." Just complete nonsense.

It's really ridiculous! My response was, "What about when/if you fall in love? Does that mean that other people in the world cease to exist and that your sexuality gets turned into a stream that is only attracted to that one person and type forever?" I love my husband and we're monogamous (though I definitely am all for poly relationships and think they're fascinating), but that doesn't mean that I find only men attractive. Oh well-some get it and some don't. I wish I could help people to understand but you know, if they don't accept me, they don't have to be around me. :)

Happy lesbian here! Been with my partner for a little over 2 years now:)

Brooklyn dyke here. I'm more femme than not but I suspect I'd be higher femme if I were thinner-right now when I attempt femme it comes out matronly. AH well- we shall see what happens

Openly pansexual married to a heterosexual here. Glad to see this thread and all the support. :) Screw people that say you can't be any one thing because of the person you're with? That doesn't even make sense!

THIS. Gosh, this sums up my entire fashion life. :mad: Especially because I enjoy vintage (40's-style, mostly) dresses, which tend to have much more conservative lines and sleeves. Most of the time, especially with my hair pulled back, I end up feeling like The Trunchbull from the mid-90s Matilda movie, which is certainly not what I'm going for. And most modern, youthful dresses, unfortunately, have empire waists, which make me look decidedly pregnant. No good, either way. I haven't learned how to pull it off, but I refuse to give up on dresses! I can only hope that slimming down will make things at least a little easier.

Bi, no significant other to speak of, also more-femme-than-not, though I certainly have my days when I want nothing to do with anything even remotely girly. :)

Hi there. Lesbian from south Florida :D

Hi! Well, I was on the old thread and moved to SF to find my first RN job, when that turned out to be really a bad move, I ended up gaining the weight I'd lost. So, now I'm working in Oregon and back to being healthy.

Wow alot more new people while I was away this weekend. How was everyone's weekend? Anyone do an excersize challenges or cook some good recipes?

Straight ally here! Just swinging by to let you know there are a lot on the board who support LGBTQ equality and rights.

Dorky butch lesbian here. :D Getting trimmer gives me more clothing options and lets me try to lean more toward dapper than dorky. Still working on that.

A couple of you mentioned wanting to femme it up but feeling frumpy in your clothes - please let your femme flag fly! Some of the hottest femmes I know are overweight. Please don't think you have to be thin to be beautiful, or that you have to wait until you are thin to be yourself. :D

I feel your pain. I wear a lot of black, and a lot of jeans. I've always been into makeup but the clothes are tough!

Gay chick living in Michigan with my gf of 2 years. :)

So this is quite off topic but I need some advice or words of encouragment.

My entire life I have been overweight...secondly even though I have lost some weight and would like to celebrate that, I am still not to a "healthy weight." My girlfriend who is extremely motivated to get healthy be healthy, who at one time was 60lbs bigger than she currently is, is at a healthy weight, and I don't think she understands that my story is different than her story.

I have never been small than gained weight, I was an over weight kid that always has been over weight. She was a healthy weight, and than gained weight in a different realtionship and we started getting healthy together. However it has been harder for me to lose weight than it has for her. Although she says she understands my struggles, I truly believe that she does not. For I have never known the land of the "healthy" or "skinny" or "inshape" or whatever land you want to call it, I have never been there. She was there, than left, than went back.

So the fact that I am at this weight I currently am is a success, and I understand that but I feel like I am letting her down by not staying as motivated as she is. Of course I have a lot more responsibilities right now in my life than she does and than from when we first started this journey. I have not given up the good fight it has just stalled slowly. (I'm still losing weight but just not at a quick pace like I first did.)

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone can sympathize with me, and or have any advice at getting her to understand how I'm feeling. ::sigh:: I have a few other things I need to get off my chest about my weight right now but I will save that for another day. If anything to anyone that reads this....thanks for listening to me. I needed it.

UKnw.. I think everyone can relate on some level. We all want to be the best we can be for our partners, and if we see them being more successful or more motivated than us, it can be challenging. Just keep in mind that just like your weight experiences are different from your girlfriend's, the way you motivate and follow through are different as well. IT doesn't mean they're better or worse, just not the same. Also keep in mind that just because you're taking longer to get to your goal, it doesn't mean that your success is "worse" than hers. You're doing what you can, when you can, and like you said, it's wonderful that you've gotten this far!

Every person I've ever dated has been pretty fit. My last boyfriend was bulking up and it made me feel terrible that I couldn't even drop some weight. My current boyfriend is a bit tubby, but I know that he could drop weight much faster than I ever could. I've always been big, so I don't know what it's like to be smaller. Sometimes, I'm a bit happy that he's gained weight while with me. It makes me feel less enormous. I honestly think that he doesn't lose weight because it would make me feel bad. He can find the motivation when I can't.

UknwULikeThat - A lot of people have this issue. You're not alone. Don't measure your success against those of others, especially your significant other. You'll get there, just not as fast as her. But you will get there. Let her success motivate you to keep going. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and your health is so much more important than the pounds that you drop.

Glad to see this post back up!

Thanks for the thoughts guys...its really appreciated.

I think that I fall somewhere between bisexual and lesbian, so I've been identifying as queer. I'm engaged to a man, but we're polyamorous and I have no interest in other men, just women... so "queer" it is!

Bisexual female here. : )
I'm glad to see a section of this community for LGBT.

Happily married queer grrrl from MD. Hello, all!

I've also never been a normal weight. I have been both bigger and smaller than I am now but have never been in a normal weight range as an adult. It's an interesting journey and I sometimes wonder what I will look like at a healthy weight. (Normal sizes look impossibly small!)

Spooky, I can't even Imagine what a normal weight is for myself...I have no idea what I would look like...But one day I will see it!

Yeah, I hear you guys. I haven't been under 200 since I was 14-15, and that was only briefly!!

I have no idea what a normal weight would look like on me. I've been big since I was 11 so it's just become normal for me. The lowest I remember being was 145 when I was 15 but I was still a size 13. I know that I have unusually large hips, but that's just insane.

What's up girl Me too! I'm bisexual although tied down with a boyf at the moment. It sucks too because he is a homophobe and southern religious and thinks gay people are going to ****, and after I told him "I'm bi am I going to ****" he was like "no I 'fixed' that"....I went OFF I was like "motha****a you can't FIX nothin I come as I am and there's nothing BROKEN about queer people!"

People are so obnoxious sometimes even loved ones.

On a positive note Twin Cities Pride is coming...well, Pride is coming for everyone!!

gay female from Ohio here.

I got extremly sick and gained about 60 pounds due to the resulting inactivity and my love of ice cream. I had fun eating my way into this mess, now I have to work out to get out of it.

Hey Sarrah! Where in Ohio? My gf is from Toledo (I'm from the east coast, moved here to be with her) and we live in Michigan ("Go blue" territory) :)

Bisexual here! :wave:

I have dated men and 1 woman (3 years of hooo-aaa!), now exploring a possible long-distance relationship with a man on the other side of the country. Going out there in July for my 40th birthday, can't wait! :cloud9: