Push Back
 

Hey All,
I hope this is this right place to post this. If not, um, let me know!
This has been a REALLY hard week. Ugg.
I have been fairly gentle with myself as I go into this process. I spent the last couple of weeks of August and the first few weeks of September just really observing and recording what I eat, when I eat and drink. And then I started to slowly shift that into eating the way that I want to be eating (homemade healthy yummy food!) and trying to cut down on my alcohol intake. I found I was consistently eating well 4 days out of 7 and the other 3,well, not so good!
This week has been TERRIBLE!!!!
I think it's a combination of being super busy at work and feeling a bit lonely and a bit frustrated with everything.
On Friday I went out and had some drinks with a friend and on my way home at like 1 in the morning, thought a couple of slices of dollar pizza would be a really good idea. BAD PLAN. I woke up feeling gross and kind of in pain and I thought, I am abusing myself-like physically! Just kind of from the inside out. And I wouldn't physically abuse myself on the outside, so why would I do it with food.
It was kind of an epiphany for me.
But then I went on to do basically the same thing last night.
Argggg!!!!!
So here I am, Sunday morning, drinking my coffee and putting this out there.
Does anyone else find that the harder they try to succeed in establishing a healthy lifestyle, the harder the push back from these habits and comforts that we have developed over years?
I suspect I am not alone in this-but this morning, I feel pretty darn alone with it.

Sometimes I feel so discouraged as well. I had a bad week/weekend too - from THURSDAY to Sunday! Because I am generally pretty strict and very aware of what I eat, when I fall... I fall HARD. I'm a huge victim of the "well, this one bad thing has ruined my whole day (or weekend), so I'm just going to eat crappy" mentality. I just need to get back on the horse when I fall off!

The worst part is how I feel about it afterward though - and I'm sure you can relate - but I feel so embarrassed, ashamed, and angry, even if it's only me who knows what happened. I hate it : (

exactly. i hate feeling the shame.
ugg. well-I hope this week is better for you
:)

Same to you! It's so hard. I'm at college as well, so for me, it makes it that much harder - I now I can do it, but I wish I had the support/food of my mother and my own kitchen : P

I find myself wanting to let frustration, anger, etc. derail my motivation but I know I can't do that. I am tougher than those tough emotions. Besides, why should I let someone's ****ty comments (or anything for that matter) wreck my own personal progress? I know eating a bunch of comfort foods apparently doesn't do anything but make me gain weight. I am trying to get into journaling my feelings to get them out and then sitting with the feelings until I work through them. When all else fails, I turn on upbeat music and lose myself in it for a while. Music has always been a great pick-me-up, it's a huge stress-buster for me.

the last 4 days, i have been feeling lonely and not great,also i've been a bot broke, so I haven't been going out at all. And I've just been trying-like you said, to just sit with it, instead of doing any of the normal things I so when I'm feeling this way, like eating or drinking or like, obsessively socializing, which is the other thing I find I do when I'm feeling like this. It's been tough, but kind of good. And even though I feel sort of sad, I feel really clear and focused.
Also, I like what you said about being tougher then those tough emotions. So true!!!

I really wasn't expecting to have to confront that much emotion so it was surprising to me but GOOD all at the same time. I finally realized that I have a really hard time being upset with people and will try to circumvent those feelings. You really can't though b/c you're human and have those emotions for a reason, to preserve and defend yourself. It's really better for me to acknowledge those feelings, appreciate them for what they are and then work to move past them on my own.