I have finally started to lose weight, have dropped 45 pounds, slowly, and was motivated by the silliest thing- I bought 2 skirts at a resale shop that were way too small, but were only $1 each. At first I felt ashamed that I had the "nerve" to buy these two skirts, and that started me thinking of my complacency and how I had lumped getting older with so many other things-no more fun clothes, no more being attractive etc etc. These realizations just don't stop, I am also remembering how many people throughout my life have felt entitled to put me down because of weight, and this goes all the way back 40 years, when I was young and normal weight, includes female friends, boyfriends, bosses etc etc A part of me feels really sad for the young woman I was, and for other women who go through so much of life concentrating on perceived flaws rather than enjoying being who they are.
In the past few years, with the magic of the internet, some of these people have contacted me, old boyfriend, old "best" friend, former neighbor, and I was not keen on hearing from each of them, but felt guilty for not wanting to reconnect, and slowly realized how the guilt was me not being kind to myself, and the aversion to these overtures was actually very healthy. Rambling post, sorry!!!!
Starts and stops of being on plan since January 2011. Back on plan May 2011.
April 2012, no progess unless you count gaining and losing the same 20 or so pounds, trying again!
“Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.”
- Marilyn Vos Savant