Wow, so many things I can relate to, my TOM got closer together,for a time every 2weeks, from 4 weeks like clockwork for years...now the last couple months I have this like phantom period, all bloated and cramps, no flow, then the next week a relatively regular one. I'm all for the off switch!
I also have little warm flashes, not hot flashes, crave more spicy foods and have no one in my or DH's family who have gone through this "regular". I find that pretty disturbing, so few women seem to have had a regular peri/menopause.
Wishing everyone the best, good to know we're not alone