In surfing the 'net today, I came across this quote about losing weight and keeping it off...thought it was worth sharing here in Maintainers since that's what it's all about...in response to: "It's a very small number of people who can lose large amounts of weight by simply dieting and excercise, and then KEEP IT OFF."
The response:
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What we don't get around to examining is WHY someone would go back to overeating. It's not the "diet" that fails - it's the person who fails to change their behavior permanently because they go into it with a mindset that they are "going on a diet".
People are weak and we like to pretend we are all strong, so when the person chooses to leave the path we blame the path. I suggest that for any person who loses weight long term (whether by surgery or otherwise), they did it because they quit blaming their path, they quit looking at the path other people were on, and they quit looking at healthy behavior as some kind of special punishment to endure and started incorporating it as a LIFESTYLE. Long term weight loss is about living a different life, not picking the right diet or surgery. You can't go on a diet or have surgery to have a different life, but you can LIVE a different life.
OK, maybe not. I don't like the use of the words "fail" and "weak" because so many overweight people are already overloaded with negative baggage. I wish those statements could have been framed in a less judgemental way (says the girl who often says things a little harshly herself!). But, the message is right on!
I love it too! In talking with all the maintainers here at 3FC, I've never found one who hasn't fully and completely embraced the responsibility for getting the weight off and KEEPING it off for life. It's so not about finding the perfect plan - it's all about changing our minds and our lives: 'living a different life'. And the weight loss naturally flows from those changes. I don't know if this is typical of the other maintainers, but there's a date etched in my mind - June 1, 2001 - when I left my old life behind forever. It's such a clear line in the sand; it was like dying and being reborn. I'll never forget that day as long as I live. It was so scary to leave my comfort zone behind ... but losing the weight turned out to be the hardest but at the same time, definitely the most rewarding thing I've accomplished in my life.
What a great quote! Rings so true to me, since I think it seems to be the one key, and possibly the only one, we all share here. An ongoing commitment to a new way of living. That is the single difference between my failures and my success. Temporary change, temporary weight loss. Permanent change, permanent weight loss.
Great quote, Karen. And I think Meg put her finger right on what unites us as maintainers, and probably everyone else who has maintained a weightloss: embracing the responsibility for changing a lifestyle, not just going on a diet.
I have to admit, while I remember exactly the date I started dieting (July 24, 2001), I really never expected to succeed, succeed to this extent, to maintain the loss, or change my lifestyle to this extent. I was thinking about this earlier today, and realized I don't know anyone in real life who has done this. I know plenty of people who have lost weight for an occasion and then gradually regained, but no one who kept it off for a year or more. It was finding this board, particularly Meg and Karen, and other on-line communities that made the difference.
Mel,
I unconsiously started my weight loss on July23/2001 (Isn't it a coincidence?)! I remember when I was walking down the street pushing Superstore cart in front of me when I saw sign - Fitness World - Open house today. I just walked in, it was my birthday and i felt awful. I went to the front desk and simply signed up for membership as B-day present to myself. I never even thought this step will be so crucial in my life.
After loosing about 15 pounds gym was not going to help anymore, so I started to watch what I eat. And so forth, and I am so glad that on that particular day when my mood was so weird, there was this Open house sign...
Wow! You guys DO remember the exact date that you started your new lives! I thought that I was the only one who was weird enough to do that. Wonder how many of the other maintainers remember The Date? Hey, there's an idea for a thread.
I also remember what I was doing the day Nixon resigned, but I don't remember what I was doing the day Kennedy was shot. I bet some (or most!) of you weren't even born then.
Wow Karen great post! And how come I haven't seen it before today is beyond me
What hit me was the following ...
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....quit looking at healthy behavior as some kind of special punishment to endure and started incorporating it as a LIFESTYLE.
Yep, it's a LIFESTYLE for your LIFETIME no two ways about it!!
I don't really remember a specific date when I started this lifestyle because I "thought" I was doing the right lifetyle...But I do remember when I saw a picture full on of my backside what a rude awakening that was and that was in January 03... I just didn't see myself that way at all! Then I took more pics in January 04, they were good progress pics but I wasn't satisfied yet... Now I January 05 I haven't taken any pics but I do know what to do... Just keep on keeping on....
And finding this site in January 2001, well that was a godsend for sure... I think it was in January 2002 that I started BFL too!! Does anyone see a patern with the Januaries here?
For me I don't have a start date, or even a true start weight. I had started and couldn't keep a plan (tried 2 or 3 from books I had and old diets in the past that had worked) for 2-3 months due to medical condition. I do remember the last weight I saw on the scales some 2-3 months before, and it's good enough for me even tho I know in my heart that I was heavier cuz the clothes I was wearing were getting too tight and it was either spend money for new fat clothes, or start to change my eating. It was just a gradual change and gradual realization that I had to change my life and my eating in ways that made sense to me.
One day sometime in late Feb or March after a bout with allergies, I decided to start making some small changes to reduce the amount of fat, sugar and salt I was eating. I never counted calories, just continued on that way, and in a few months started exercising by walking laps thru the house.
I tweaked the foods more, increased time and speed of walking and in about a year lost 110 lbs. Gained a few, then now loosing a few to find a weight that is easy to maintain. But I have kept off 95 lbs for almost a year now. Still don't count calories and probably never will again. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt back in my 30's.
I'm posting late to the thread more for me tonight as I collect my thoughts and find my inner wisdom to continue onward now to loose 10 more lbs to take me into the lower 150's again. I was is the 140's for about 6 months, just because it was the BMI suggested weight for my height, but it was such a struggle. I don't want to struggle that much the rest of my life. I think the 150-155 range will be a good goal weight for me. It is much better than the 260 lb range I was in before. And will be easy enough to maintain without counting calories or charting exercises. I do walk for an hour 3-4 days a week at a speed of 4.2 -4.4 (when I'm on the treadmill) I've come a long way.
And best of all.... I did it my way. I replaced the negative lifestyle habits with the positive and healthy lifestyle habits that made sense to me as I went along.
I am proud of my accomplishments tonight. Been a bit iffy since Christmas, but this week I've turned a corner, and am ready to work at it again. Geesh, it's only 5-10 lbs. But that's a big step emotionally for me. To choose the weight I feel I can live comfortably the rest of my life. Me, by myself to choose what I think feels right. I've indeed come a long way.
I think that quote perfectly explains why I don't believe diet pills and fad diets work. It's not the pill, it's not the diet, it's all what's in the individual. It's like quitting smoking. The patch works for some and not others. Why? Because some really and truly wanted to quit. They realized deep down a need to quit for whatever reason. The patch was just a feel good cure
I remember the day, and the time I heard when President Kennedy was shot.
I was in the 4th grade. We were out at recess on a nice chilly but sunny day playing tag in the upper playing field. We were all called back into our classrooms, the radio broadcast was playing on the speakers, we were all quietly sitting in our seats not sure of the big scope of the incident, but knowing it was something monumental by the way the adults were responding. We were sent home early from school.
Allie -- Interesting I remember the day too that Kennedy was assinated, and I'm Canadian, just to show the impact the man had... I was in first grade (I'm older than you are :P ) and I was skipping rope at recess... We had nuns and they announced it after recess and I remember going home and being glued to the black and white tube watching the whole affaire ...
Count me in as another one who remembers all too well exactly what I was doing when John Kennedy was shot; I even remember what I was wearing (darkish blue wool jumper with a light blue blouse. I remember thinking that I looked quite fetching in that outfit.) I was a sophomore sitting in Latin II, and I will never forget the moment Mrs. Sumner, a fabulous teacher but very old-school, walked quietly to the front of the room and announced there had been a terrible event. … I remember she had tears in her eyes. …
That was 42 years ago and it could have happened yesterday. No less vivid is the day my new life began and you know what? You were all here to see it happen. In fact, you all MADE it happen!
On Nov. 18, 2004, we were talking about strategizing for the holidays, and I said:
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Yes, I think we'll all do splendidly over the holidays. In fact, I *always* do well over the holidays; I *always* do well when I'm totally psyched for it. I hurl myself into overdrive in November and December: I plot; I plan; and I meticulously count every sugar plum, every figgy pudding. For the last several years, I haven't gained at Christmastime.
And quicker than I could say pomp and circumstance, there was Meg saying lovingly, but firmly:
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Forewarned is forearmed, as they say. You've got MONTHS before Commencement and summer to make a plan. And I know the folks here would be happy to help you brainstorm a strategy to fend off the Sugar Sharks. If you apply the same amount of thought and energy to negotiating those potential pitfalls as you do to making it through the holidays, you're guaranteed the same degree of success.
And that was the beginning of my new life. In a flash I saw that it was up to me. I held the key in my hands; I just had to use it. Everything I knew about weight loss; all the previous experiences – good and bad; every book and article I had ever read; every tip and every trick … it all slid together into one interlocking mosaic, based on the idea that Mrs. Jim started us with:
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Long term weight loss is about living a different life, not picking the right diet or surgery. You can't go on a diet or have surgery to have a different life, but you can LIVE a different life.
It's been 73 days since Nov. 18. Since then, I've come through two board meetings, one Commencement ceremony, and the holidays. I've managed a fair amount of exercise; I've eaten well and wisely; and I've lost 2 or 3 pounds. I'm never going back!
Y'all are making me feel every one of my 60 years! When Kennedy was killed I was sitting in a college class! They sent us home for the rest of the week - which was a mad scramble on a college campus in a small town without regular public transportation.
And I remember when I "got the message" about losing weight. I saw a photo of myself taken in Oct 98 with my DH, his two siblings and all of their spouses. Now keep in mind that both of my SILs are tiny - one is 5', the other 5'1" - and both thinnish. But still, there I was, 5'4" (tall in this family ) and 240#. Ye gads, I was appalled. This was not the person I saw in the mirror! I took myself to WW shortly thereafter, and by the spring of 2000 I had lost nearly 70#. I maintained that loss for nearly 2 years, and have for many reasons (but no excuses!) regained too much. I'm on the way again down again though. . .
Killer Thoughts on maintenance...
It was so scary to leave my comfort zone behind ... but losing the weight turned out to be the hardest but at the same time, definitely the most rewarding thing I've accomplished in my life.
what a rude awakening that was and that was in January 03... I just didn't see myself that way at all! Then I took more pics in January 04, they were good progress pics but I wasn't satisfied yet... Now I January 05 I haven't taken any pics but I do know what to do... Just keep on keeping on....
and they announced it after recess and I remember going home and being glued to the black and white tube watching the whole affaire ...
) and 240#. Ye gads, I was appalled. This was not the person I saw in the mirror! I took myself to WW shortly thereafter, and by the spring of 2000 I had lost nearly 70#. I maintained that loss for nearly 2 years, and have for many reasons (but no excuses!) regained too much. I'm on the way again down again though. . . 
