OK … I ***** and moan when my husband is working out of state and not home during the week …. But I have a more difficult time staying on plan when he is here!!!
This is his second week home and I’m not doing well … this is in NO WAY, his fault and I take full responsibility for my bad choices … but it’s just different. He actually IS supportive … some of my reason for having an easier time when he’s not here is pure logistics. For example, when he’s away, I’m working on a VERY tight schedule … I don’t have the time to stop on the way to work for a cup of coffee. I can’t “succumb to temptation” at the coffee shop if I don’t go there. I need to have a rough idea of what’s for dinner each night so that I don’t waste time figuring it out when I get home – so I make my decisions when I’m NOT hungry. My kids sleep on the third floor. My son gets upset at the thought of being “left alone up there”. Once he’s in bed at 8pm, I don’t leave my 2nd floor (which consists of my family room, ‘laundry closet’, bedroom and bathroom) -- for a while he was getting up to check to be sure I was still there and I don’t want to upset him. So, if I can’t go to my first floor kitchen, I can’t nibble at night. And, I don’t have another adult there bringing snacks up to the family room.
BUT … there’s other things … I rely on him (which I can’t do if he’s not there) and sometimes he doesn’t think that what he’s doing (or not doing) will have an impact on me! Yesterday HE asked what I wanted for dinner … I told him “it really doesn’t matter, as long as there’s lots of veggies and not too much starch”. I’m fighting PMS cravings something wicked this week -- I did NOT give in at work but went home ready to eat a horse. When I arrived home he was sitting on the porch watching the kids play in the dusting of snow we had (we haven’t had ANY snow since they got new slide-y things for Christmas.) I said “what do I need to do to wrap-up dinner?” His answer: “Oh nothing’s started … I’m going to give the kids noodle soup, grilled cheese, celery and carrots”. Um, what about me??!? He thought we could figure it out and eat later. But I was hungry!!! I then proceeded to go in and start cooking for the kids and eat everything in sight … I did manage to stop before things got
totally out of hand … but needless to say, a handful of olives, 2 slices of cold pizza and 4 cookies is NOT a healthy or satisfying meal! And I didn’t feel too good about myself afterwards.
To my credit … in times past, I would have “snacked” like I did and then AFTER the kids were in bed, I would have eaten a ‘real’ meal ---- so this was a bit of an improvement!
Next Monday my husband starts a new temp position out of state … and this time it’s too far away for him to come home for mid-week visits like in the past.
(But it’s only for 5-8 weeks). I’ll have to say good-bye to my hour-long lunch break walks (cuz of my need to drop-off and pick-up my kids at certain times, I’ll only take a 20-30 minute lunch break) … and I know the kids will miss Dad terribly … but in some respects, I AM looking forward to seeing better results. How bad is that?