Originally Posted by PatLib
I agree, I meant that part of my comment as more generalized. I agree he should have been honest with you or had at least do the lame "it's not you it's me" thing so you are not left hanging.
I just dislike this whole idea that gets thrown around a lot "well he/she is a jerk if your weight bothers him/her."
Maybe not a bad person, but certainly shallow. I understand if it's really about wanting someone who shares a love of fitness, but if it's ALL about appearance, that is shallow. Not to mention that any overweight person, for all you know, is working on losing weight and getting in shape and could be just as into fitness as anyone. I HATE when fit people who work out on a daily basis say they wouldn't date someone overweight, not because of the looks issues, but because "I care about fitness and I deserve a partner who cares about fitness too." Because there are plenty of overweight people who DO care about fitness and even some who spend MORE time at the gym than the fit people.
I get that it's anyone's prerogative to be shallow if they want, but I stand by what I said that that's probably a big reason for all the divorces that are so prevalent these days. There was actually a guy from my early 20s, whom I thought was the one at the time, who married a girl for her looks - she could have been a bikini model, but they ended up divorced within less than 3 years.
Again, I don't think someone is a bad person for being shallow. To be honest, my reasons for being so into this guy, thinking about it now, had a lot to do with his looks. So I do it too, to an extent. But I would never write someone off for not being ideal physically - that's the difference IMO. And I despise the guys who say they would sleep with a fat girl but never date her seriously or let their friends know that they have anything to do with her - basically because she's fat they think it's okay to treat her like garbage - I guess at least this guy didn't try to do that, I'll give him that.
I hope I didn't come off like I was attacking you, PatLib. I value everyone's opinion, and I didn't just come on here looking for people to agree with everything I said. I appreciate the support that I have gotten from everyone here!