your post really moved me. i've had overeating/binge eating problems all my life. i managed to lose over 70 pounds twice in my life, just to gain them back and feel miserable. i tested a lot of diets and had numerous other "episodes" where i lost between 10 and 40 pounds and gained even more weight later on.
for a very long time i thought that my problem was that i love food (especially unhealthy food) and lack self discipline. and i focused my efforts exclusively on losing weight, without looking deeper into why i am actually eating too much, too often and not healthy. it was really important for me to take the time to figure it out. and turns out i use food to deal with problems, stress, emotions, boredom etc.
dieting without understanding why i tend to overeat and binge never worked for me. that's why now i'm trying to tackle my eating disorder from different sides, hoping that this time i will find a way to deal with it on a long-term basis.