I have not read all the responses, but from what I did read, you've gotten some great advice already. Get started. That's the best advice I can give you now. Sometimes when we gain weight, we hate it so much that we want it off yesterday---and that attitude of anger, frustration, etc., prevents us from accepting the reality that we need to put one foot in front of the other and get started. Believe me, I know how you feel. What helped me was to just start the program and not pressure myself to lose X amount of weight by X date. Instead, I said to myself, "I'm going to start eating healthier, counting calories, and moving more (whatever I can do), and let the weight fall where it may." In fact, I didn't weigh myself at all during the entire process because I wanted to focus on behavior changes rather than weight loss (the former is under my control more than the latter). When I finally reached the size I wanted to be, I decided to weigh myself, and I was below the weight that I would have been satisfied with when I first started. I know that many people are motivated by weighing and having more specific weight-related goals, but for me, that would not have worked when I was first starting.
Also, once you lose even one pants size, you will feel SO much better and will be more encouraged to continue.
I also empathize with you concerning having a boyfriend who likes to eat out. My husband loves to eat out. I put a limit on it, though. Also, because the highest-calorie dining [for me] is going out to dinner, I start my "day's" calorie count with dinner, and the next day's breakfast and lunch complete one "day's" calories.
I hope all that helps. Just get started and you will feel so much better a month from now when you've dropped a few pounds.
Clothes Sizes (not lbs):