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Old 04-04-2014, 08:11 AM   #125
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: New York, NY
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Height: 5'4"


Originally Posted by yoyoma View Post
I think that can be the case, but if I came across as sounding outraged, that was certainly not my intent. It would be great if the worst anyone ever had to deal with in hearing blanket statements that didn't apply to them was people with restrictive WOEs hearing "moderation in everything" once in a while. But it's a slippery slope so I just wanted to mention it since many of the people on this thread have clearly gone out of their way to avoid blanket statements about their WOEs and I wanted to encourage them to continue that.
And some people have clearly gone out of their ways to make blanket statements about their WOE and there has not been one method proven yet to discourage them from doing so. Sigh.

One thing to consider is that what works for us now may not work for us in the future. For example when I try to picture my future I want to know that I won't be suffering with an ED, I don't want to be counting calories or weighing foods. However I see myself maintaining is how I want to go about losing weight. You know what they say, dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. How we choose our method and why we choose it is different for everyone. Our motives are all different whether it's quick weight loss, long term weightloss, reclaiming health, fashion aspirations, fitness goals, fertility, finding a mate, fitting in an airplane seat... we're all different and we all have our own personal challenges and none of them are invalid. Someone who wants to simply lose 10 lbs before July so they can fit into their wedding dress is going to have a different mindset and different challenges than someone who is facing some frightening health complications. The seriousness of some of our challenges probably make us anxious, and may come across as snappy, judgy, and sometimes gloating. It's only a testament to how seriously we need to commit to our WOE because in the face of judgement from others we only have our own fragile sense of balance with what's worked for us.

Food is something we'll have to live with every day. We can either chose to see it as nourishment or an enemy. For me it's been both and at wild extremes to say the least. That inner battle with food has taken the focus off what I should be thinking about and that's how to take care of myself. No need to battle food, food is not my problem. My inner struggles of self-esteem, coping with stress, self-acceptance are what I want to focus on, food is just a smokescreen.

Re-reading my title for this thread I now see that it may be misleading to say "food" is pleasure because I've gone through great lengths to come to terms with the fact that food is just food and nothing more. It's an inanimate object that couldn't care less if I ate it or not. Perhaps a better title would have been "Eating IS pleasure!" We may not agree about what foods we eat but as long as we find pleasure in what we're eating then we're all doing what is best. I never want to see anyone be bored over their bowl of oatmeal or grow to resent their standard lunch of salad and grilled chicken breast.

So how do you go about making eating pleasurable?
1. I try to make eating an event. I sit down and try not to interrupt myself with work or emails or tv. All too often we eat on the run, at work at our desk, standing up, or out of the vending machine. And we eat way too fast. Our jobs aren't that important that we can't take a good 30min to nourish ourselves!

2. I try not to eat in front of the tv - All day long I think about food yum! Then I sit in front of my plate and zone out on the tv - No!

3. Family meals are fun to make together and then eat together.

4. I try not to eat anything out of obligation. I don't force myself to eat kale, I don't like kale and I don't care how nutritious or in style it is. I'll stick to spinach. I like almonds sometimes, but I prefer cashews darn it! I no longer make myself eat things just because they're in fad or healthy. There's plenty of healthy choices out there that I can enjoy instead.

5. I try not to judge myself over what I'm eating. That way I don't make myself guilty which is a whole other monster that's been demoralizing me for decades.

I'd love to hear more if you have any.

"If you pay attention to when you are hungry, what your body wants, what you are eating, when you've had enough, you end the obsession because obsession and awareness cannot coexist." - Geneen Roth

Last edited by Palestrina; 04-04-2014 at 08:19 AM.
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