Yoyoma, i will leave the first part of your post til later when i've had more time to digest it.
The second part of the post.
I don't know anything about you so i don't know how i can respond to that. And it probably wouldn't be seen as acceptable to ask enough questions to get to the bottom of your story. So another reason i can't respond.
If people are going to defend the avoidance of grains, then they should put forward a convincing argument. "i can't eat grains because they make me fat" is not any kind of argument. Its just an assertion that does nothing to change my mind. But if someone somewhere has made a very good case against then, then maybe you could share that. Because blimey, i've never seen one.
The weight of scientific opinion is against the paleo diet. So what's next?