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Old 03-04-2014, 08:33 AM   #9
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Palestrina's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,607

S/C/G: 215/188/150

Height: 5'4"


Thank you everyone, I am overwhelmed by the support and compassion I have awoken to today, I admit I've just felt a burst of joy in it, thank you all for taking the time to respond to me, I've felt pretty useless around here while I try to find my stride with this new outlook and I want everyone to know that although we approach things in our own way I support everyone's goals!

Originally Posted by pixelllate View Post
Perhaps change the goal on your ticker? That could be a big stress relief, like making the lb goal a bit smaller. Maybe a little self reminder that getting rid of clothes that are collecting dust anyways is pretty freeing. I remember holding onto clothes that I was half unsure if I would ever even fit into again, and even when I tried them on, I realized that I didn't even like the style anymore so I was hanging onto a dream size, not the fashion (I'm guessing that these are old clothes from the past right?)

I can relate to not having anyone to relate to in real life in general outside of weight, so instead, I just seek out understanding people who might not do exactly what I am doing, but they also try to be understanding of the "different strokes for different folks."
Pixellate, I will change the goal on my ticker. In fact my fitbit goal is to get to 180 so I'll change it to that. To tell the truth the real goal is to feel comfortable around food no matter what the scale says but it's true that seeing such a low number does make me a little seasick.

Weight is such a personal subject. I have friends of course and they're all doing something or another, it's just hard to relate to each other because we are divided by so much shame and guilt about how we look and how we behave around food. It's a barrier. I remember trying to tell 2 of my closest friends about my eating disorder and they had nothing to say in response, I imagine my confession must have sounded either too foreign to them or all too familiar, either way it was too hard for them to speak about it. Shame and guilt are very alienating.

"If you pay attention to when you are hungry, what your body wants, what you are eating, when you've had enough, you end the obsession because obsession and awareness cannot coexist." - Geneen Roth
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