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Old 02-23-2014, 08:47 AM   #5
Wannabeskinny
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 3,168

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Height: 5'4"

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Originally Posted by Mazzy View Post
Dieting causes projection, aka disconnecting from the current self in hopes that the future body will be different.

I work on that more so than on my eating style, which I have discovered is secondary. Eating should be a simple, instinctive drive, not a mechanized projection of the mind. In other words, I no longer "worry" when/how the next meal arrives. I'll deal with that when the time comes.
Perfectly said Mazzy, it's the disconnection that has gotten to me too. Like I haven't wanted to be associated with myself at all. I've looked at myself and said "you are not to be trusted" for so long that I kind of feel sorry for that girl I've left behind. She was very strong at one point and I've dumbed her down and stripped her of power. I'm learning to accept her and trust her. She was born with the ability to get hungry, ask for food, and sate her hunger. We were all born with that power and we spend all our lives supressing it.

Oh the worries I've had over my next meal!! This too is gone now. I don't panic if my toddler steals a fry and I don't mind sharing my omelette with him now. Do you know how difficult that was for me before? And how much guilt it caused me to not want to share food with my own child? I order so much less food from the take out place now. I don't get worried if the fridge is sparse. I'm satisfying all my cravings and enjoying food more.
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"Binging is a descent into a world where every restriction... is cut loose. At its core is a feeling of deprivation.. a feeling you can never get enough. Binges do not signify a lack of willpower or inability to care for yourself. On the contrary, binges are a urgent attempt to care for yourself when you feel uncared for. They are the voice of survival. Binges are the mark of the self that says, 'I am tired of feeling deprived, of being told I am wrong, that I am bad." - Geneen Roth
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