So I had an...
okay day?? I was able to workout and stay under cals, but with TOM here, I am so low energy
. Today was an official weigh-in day and I weighed in at 224.4--merilung
and I must have had our Oneder-Twin mojo activated or something
Anyways, I keep notes for each official weigh-in, complete with information on any nsv's, exercise routines, calorie changes--basically anything I might find pertinent later on about the particular week that proceeded the weigh-in. So as I read through my notes, I realized that I have lost a total of 25lbs since Nov.26--less than 3 months--which should be a victory right? However, I found myself unable to muster any genuine excitement. I have been so focused on how much further I have to go, that I really have not taken time to acknowledge how far I have come. I find this disheartening, because I would like to be really excited, but my ungrateful mind is not communicating those emotions. Now, I am not posting all this to get a pat on the back, but instead illustrating, that maybe you--like me--have not taken the time to truly celebrate how far you have come. And we really should be much more proud of ourselves than we are. Onderland is a great goal, but I want to get there maintaining the best mental shape possible. I liken it to getting to goal weight, all cardio and no strength training--so I lost the weight, but now I'm mad because I'm "flabby". I feel just like that. I'm chugging along to Onderland, not particularly focused on enjoying the journey or the "small victories" but instead moving along, anticipating that 199 will be my savior--my happy--and knowing me, it won't be.
I guess what this really boils down to, is that I am afraid of getting discouraged, bored, or uninspired enough that suddenly I will give up. Now, more than likely, this will be unintentionally, because we almost always have good intentions, but nevertheless it's still a setback (whether temporary or not). A setback that could have been avoided, had I taken the time to nurture the happy moments, re-ignite my inspirations, and properly program my mind to accept this journey, as more than temporary or a means to get to a goal, but a new way of life. So yeah, my body is not the only thing that needs some "work"
The hormone issue crossed my mind, and honestly I should have entertained it as more than a possibility, but of course I didn't. I will definitely be looking into it though. Honestly, I am hoping it is more of a simple matter....