The other day, I caught myself in the middle of calling myself a cesspool. I realize that kind of negative self-talk will not help me on my journey so I've decided to make a concerted effort to engage in active, daily positive self-affirmation. It has nothing to do with vanity. It has to do with building self-esteem and confidence to continue with my journey to a healthier life.
Last night, even though I didn't really feel like it, I laced up my leg brace, put on my sneakers, and did a 60 min. aerobic workout. I am extremely proud of myself for making that effort, for putting everything I had into the workout, and for sweating like crazy in the end. I did a good job.
Feel free to join the self-love fest and share something positive about yourself.
Good for you!!! I have taught myself for so long that I am not worthy, I have to stop myself all the time and reframe my thoughts to remain positive. Gets easier the more you do it!!
Sadly, my beloved Ragdoll kitty, Bugs passed away on Friday after a very brief but serious illness. I loved my baby so much and miss her greatly. Despite the grief and sorrow, I've managed to stay on track with my program and have not binged. After two days without working out, I did a 67 minute workout this afternoon.
I am a strong woman and I am learning to deal with my emotions without turning to food. I am proud of my progress.
I have a horrible time with this habit. I suffered years of emotional and physical abuse from a first marriage..while I no longer have anyone else putting me down, pointing out flaws real or make believe, I continue to tear myself down, think horribly negative about myself and I never congratulate myself.
I just completed a huge project at work, the most difficult one I've ever had. I finish it, on time and does what it was supposed to do (computer graphing), yet I never once told myself "good job" I printed off the graphs and charts I made, brought them home, and spent hours looking at each chart..I pointed out every little detail I didn't like, what I felt could be better, that voice telling me someone else in the office could have done better. I tear myself down so badly that I am walk around embarrassed at work. I keep dodging the boss and when he doesn't see me I think thank goodness because he had to have been disappointed with that report. I hear what I believe to be my boss's voice in my head saying I never should have asked her to prepare it, maybe its not to late to have someone else fix it etc. I don't help myself at all.
On the personal front I lost a great deal of weight years ago. I have gained some of it back, when I see myself it is a constant negative picture. I can not find a single part or area of my body that I look at and accept. I hate everything about my body and that isn't healthy-from my hair, to my toes..I dislike everything and lately have felt like hiding as badly as I did when I was over 220 lbs. I feel the self esteem I did have (as little as it was) be sucked away. I'm empty.
It even difficult to think of one thing to tell myself that is positive, directly related to myself. Is anyone else in this type of situation? How do you fix it? I mean I am to a point I'd have to tell myself the smallest positive thing to start with.
I made it thru this morning and came thru fine. I am trying to count all the positive things I do in a day-anything from paying bills, picking up groceries, etc.
So far I have done numerous things for others in the household this morning-individual things that mean a lot to each person from rides to school, making favorite cookies for husband to take to work, being there with my son this morning for surgery. I am going to try to spend some times on myself-positive time that is.
I am a giving, caring, person that can be counted on.
Now I just have to work on being giving and caring towards myself.