At lunch time I went to Trader Joe's and picked up an Asian Crunchy Slaw (~350 calories since I leave out the crispy noodles and over half the dressing) and a diet ginger ale. That was my lunch. I also picked up some veggies, a yogurt dip, baked snack peas, and a liter of milk to keep at the office for the rest of the week and beyond. The cashier (early 20s, skinny female) looked at my items in the basket and looked at me and exclaimed, "Wow! That's a BIG lunch!" I looked at her with a confused expression and said, "What?" She repeated herself. "That's a BIG lunch!" I said, "That's lunch plus items to keep in the office fridge for the week." I thought about questioning her about her comment but I didn't want to come across as the angry fat chick. I paid and left... with a furrowed brow.
What the heck was that? Poor bantering skills? A dig at my size?
I'm guessing "a dig at your size". It was none of her business what you brought and pretty shitty to assume you'd eat all of that in one sitting (even if you were to eat all of that for one meal, it's still none of her business).Fat shamers are always "brave" about giving in their 2 cents where it's not needed.
I think TJ's cashiers are encouraged to be talkative. I have had some really odd and awkward conversations. Woe be the cashier who tries to banter with me on a bad health day -- all my energy at that point has gone to actually getting to the store, with little left to form coherent sentences.
I had one really weird conversation with a young-ish cashier recently who wanted to chat about how excited I must be to be engaged, when was the wedding, etc, while pointing at my wedding ring. ... I've been married for a few years. I was so confused. It was just a terribly awkward interaction. Actually, now that you have me thinking about it, I've had a TON of awkward/weird chit chat interactions with TJ's cashiers (but not elsewhere). I'll bet it wasn't personal!
I vote for poor bantering skills. I hate this trend towards chit chat at the grocery store. One guy near the bulk bins commented on my green watch and then told me a whole story about a woman who used to always dress in red. Really, I couldn't care less, it went on way too long, and I just wanted to grab my coffee beans and go.
I think it was probably intended as conversation (banter). The salad gave her the idea that it was all lunch and that's what came out of her mouth. To you and me, your items seem like a small grocery order, not one meal.
I am a chatty Cathy and love my chit chat with my local TJ cashiers.
I would assume they meant no harm in all situations. Try to not take it personally or ruin an otherwise good day. There is just no way to tell for sure what their intentions were.
Yes, poor bantering skills. From what I've heard, TJs cashiers are supposed to comment on what you are buying or they get in trouble. I guess maybe she couldn't think what to say or was trying to joke around and did a poor job at it.
I agree with the poor bantering skills. Society has this stigma about looks, weight and how we are "suppose" to be to be acceptable. Those of us larger beauties are in one way or another sadly judged by preconceived notions. I say take it with a grain of salt, have a great sense of humor and stay strong in your health goal.
I'm all for chit chat at Trader Joe's if it's with one of their hot guys. But for this woman to think I'm going to eat $15 worth of groceries for lunch?! Urg. I'll avoid her line next time.
There was a great thread on this from awhile back, before you joined the site. It was so great that I searched it up for you. I just remember it as having a lot of funny comments on a very similar topic.
My Mother always said "Personal remarks are seldom in good taste." Maybe the cashiers should stick to comments about the weather. There was no need for you to explain your purchases.
Tactfulness should be met with tact. If someone told me that I'd say "I don't appreciate personal comments about my purchases" or something else direct like that. The worst thing you can do is walk away without saying anything and letting it make you feel bad. Why should a strange have the capacity to do that?
This reminds me of a time when I went out for sushi with a friend. She ordered 3 rolls for her meal and the waiter said "wow, that's a lot of food." My friend was mortified and speechless but I said "that's none of your business what we order." He apologized but if he hadn't I would have talked to the manager. I mean, they have 3 rolls as a special, it was on the menu lol!
This reminds me of a time when I went out for sushi with a friend. She ordered 3 rolls for her meal and the waiter said "wow, that's a lot of food." My friend was mortified and speechless but I said "that's none of your business what we order." He apologized but if he hadn't I would have talked to the manager. I mean, they have 3 rolls as a special, it was on the menu lol!
Well I think restaurants are a bit different and they should let you know that you might be over ordering. There could've been a better way to say it but I've had various experiences where I was out with others and we were given a heads up about potentially over ordering and the restaurant was always right.
If it's any consolation, the cashier at my grocery store keeps asking my husband if I'm pregnant yet because of the weird combination of food he buys and the fact we once bought a pregnancy test. I just laugh it off, but I know personally that don't mean any harm by it.
That's a BIG lunch!
Woe be the cashier who tries to banter with me on a bad health day -- all my energy at that point has gone to actually getting to the store, with little left to form coherent sentences. 
But for this woman to think I'm going to eat $15 worth of groceries for lunch?! Urg. I'll avoid her line next time.
