Today and yesterday are the first days since I've been dieting (this time) that I feel like I've binged.
Now, I've eaten over maintenance, but these past two days I have eaten without regard (or almost rebelliously) against counting a calorie.
I can't say I feel out of control as much as I feel like a spoiled child that is tired of seeing a toy locked away from them that they can't play with.
I have access to food, can afford to eat (Thank God) and I'm an adult. I want to eat and darn it, I will. That's not my motto, I just mean that is the feel of it.
I bet you I've eaten close to 3000 calories today. That is beyond crazy for me. Heck, that was crazy even when I was at a higher weight.
Now, I know part of it is PMS but I PMS every month and it doesn't turn into this.
I know it's mostly psychological b/c I even took a diet pill and that didn't stop me from eating. I wasn't hungry, but honestly, I don't suppose I was eating b/c I was hungry.
I haven't given up.
I don't feel like I'm tortured or depressed.
I don't even feel really bad about it.
I just want it to be over and be in the mindset to lose weight again.
I wish there was like a vitamin you could take to prevent it. LOL
I try and give myself "guilt free days" when I know I'm hankering for some serious chow time. Actually, I'm no longer in a restrictive diet state of mind, but being more mindful of how much I eat and how certain foods make me feel physically instead of emotionally.
I actually like that you don't feel guilty. I think many of us have a rebellious child inside, just waiting to get out and take some control...however, it just can't happen too often. I actually think a binge is a lot harder to overcome when there are terrible feelings of guilt/regret. Just drink lots of water, get back on track (even if you don't feel like it) and put it behind you.
Your body kind of wants to be a median weight - thats why a lot of doctors will tell you, especially if you've been heavy for a long time - "some people just aren't meant to be thin". You may not feel "hungry" and you may not even cognitively want food, but the subconscious is a very powerful thing. Women especially put on weight easily for a reason - from an evolutionary standpoint, if there's a famine, you're the one that has to has to stick around and take care of the babies, right?
You don't feel guilty, and you shouldn't, because your brain is hopped up on a bunch of dopamine from the wonderful tasting foods you're eating. There's a reason certain foods taste good to us, after all - ever wondered why dogs don't care for sweet things, or why a molecule of sugar tastes sweet to us from the get go? Our brains have been programmed to let us know - hey, we want more of that, it's rare in nature and that will help us in the long run. In a bit, you'll get over this rush, your body will calm down, and this binging will probably help. Think of it as a reset button for your diet. You might gain a few lbs, but the extra calories your bod has been used to is going to surprise it when you go back down to 1200 again. It'll melt off.
So, cogratulations, pig out for a bit! Remember, losing weight is a life-log lifestyle change. Did you really think you'd go THE REST OF YOUR LIFE without pigging out again? Nah, I wouldn't want to live like that. Why would you?
Ya it seems like more of a healthy need for a break from the strict than a problem. I overate with negative consequences for several months straight and some demon in my head truly didn't care whatsoever about my pleas and troubles (weight gain, digestive strife, costing too much, etc). This seems normal and safe!
I get what you mean. I just had one of these days myself - I unashamedly admit that I ate ~2,350 kcal today. Yesterday I ate very little (not purposely, that's just what happened) and exercised a lot. Today started off well enough with an on-plan breakfast and on-plan (but somewhat larger than usual) lunch, but the excessive deficit from yesterday really came back to bite me in the evening. I could blame the sugar or TTOM or whatever, but honestly I simply let myself go a little today. My inner two-year-old is happy. I see no need to guilt myself about it; I wouldn't want to live a life in which I can NEVER overeat for the sake of overeating. One day is hardly the end of the world - if I don't see any more losses this week, so be it.
When you binge and don't give a poop
