You have so much courage!! My ex and I were like that. We had a lot of good in our relationship, but I never felt like he was "the one". I started to convince myself that maybe that feeling was hollywood, that real love was the comfort and the love we had for each other, and that the "in love" feeling wasn't real/I wasn't capable of it. When we broke up (he said the words first, but I agreed), it was all very mutual and understanding. I was relieved that it was not *my* regret to let the relationship go, but I wanted to date other people.
How did I transition? Well...my first mistake was continuing to live together. We thought that because we had always been friends, we could make it happen. He started dating someone else (which was...okay. not great, but I could deal), and from there started a spiral down of drugs and being a complete jerk to me. This man, who I had loved for 5 years and moved 1500 miles for, looked me in the eye and said "I don't have to give a s*** about you anymore, so I don't care what you want". I had 1 friend in the area, who was useless, and everyone else I cared about was 1500 miles away. The biggest pain was the feeling that I never mattered to someone I gave that many years of my life to. I just wanted to know I mattered. I had never felt so lost, so alone, so completely out of control within my own life.
How did I cope? Honestly, a visit to my hometown and my absolute best friend. She took me out, she let me cry, she gave me advice, and we had fun. She is the #1 person who always accepts me for me, and that was exactly what I needed to find my inner strength. I came back after my visit with the idea of moving back to my hometown...but decided I wasn't done with where I was. I'm sure I could have gotten to this point by myself, but having someone who is 100% on my side was what I truly needed. I knew I would move emotionally forward, and I remembered how strong I am. I remembered that NO one, no man or friend, could take that away from me.
A month later, I met my current BF
I was in the mindset that I was open to a relationship but I certainly wasn't looking for one. I was happy with myself, and anyone who wanted to come into my life would only do so if they were a brightness to it (and I to them). So while I did not spend a lot of time single, I think the transition to the single life comes with surrounding yourself with good people and things you enjoy.