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Old 04-14-2013, 03:59 PM   #125
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Originally Posted by Wannabeskinny View Post
I don't think you're being snarky at all. I question methods of non dieting myself because I perceive it to mean that we have to snap our fingers and become a different person. We all know people who are naturally thin/fit, who don't worry about food or calories, who intrinsically eat the right amount of food at the right time and don't get led around by their cravings. I want to be like those people, I want to "not diet too" we want to be "naturally thin" but the truth is I am not. I've tried pretending to be like them hoping that the fake-it-till-you-make-it-method works. But I can't do it.

Disordered eating is a real concept, not something you can just wish away. I strive to reach the happy balance between binging and restrictive dieting but like you say, even one little tiny change feels restrictive! Even if I decide that instead of eating a whole bag of cheetos I'll have a large bowl instead even that feels like a noose, like I'm policing myself. And then that restrictive behavior leads to binging. I love the concept of not dieting but I love the concept of losing weight more. Those 2 will never reconcile in my life, for others yes, for me I can't imagine it.

You have perfectly expressed the main conflict I have when I read a thread like this one. In fact, for some reason---and I'm not proud to admit this---I tend to get a little angry reading posts from those who have "stopped dieting." For those who posted such---Southern Maven, bingefree, et al---please don't hate me for being honest. It's really nothing personal. Perhaps I'm envious because you've reached some Nirvana that I would love to get to but can't. I keep asking myself, "But how???" Just knowing is not the same as doing. I can tell myself ad nauseam to "Eat like a normal person. Don't diet" but I when I do that, I know all along that I'm faking it. In reality, like Wannabe noted, I want to eat half or a WHOLE loaf of that crusty Italian bread---and with butter.
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