I was never a chronic dieter or long term restricter but I stopped counting calories (this caused horrible binges and a lot of self-hate) and focus on eating enough to (A) fuel workouts and (B) not feel starving or stuffed at nearly any point. I do have a roster of "daily" foods like Greek yogurt, chicken, tuna, turkey burgers, fish, veggies etc but if someone else cooks I will happily eat whatever they make. I guess I am trying to trust my intuition and hope for the best - I do weigh a lot more than you (ok 5-10 pounds I guess) and used to be overweight so from my perspective this is "best shape I've ever been in."
What's made it easier for me is focusing on fitness goals particularly in lifting weights, and sticking to a consistent routine in my life. I work the same hours every day, practice leangains-ish meal timing (I eat 2 meals - one in early afternoon and one at dinnertime), and make getting a lot of sleep a priority.