I know how you feel. Learning to deal with food issues is so daunting. Restrictive eating causes weight loss, but it also causes bingeing! I never just feel normal. What's even worse is that as I get older I make more and more good choices like daily salads, fresh fruits and vegetables, quitting artificial sweeteners, quitting soda, giving up processed foods, and giving up sugar. The problem is.... I'm still not losing weight. It's like no matter how good I am I'll over eat a salad with too much avocado in it. I can never ever ever win and I can never be satisfied. It's torture.
“If you try to lose weight by shaming, depriving and fearing yourself, you will end up shamed, deprived, and afraid.” Geneen Roth