Originally Posted by sacha
Start finding interests together and build an integrated life. You didn't fall in love by spending time apart, you won't stay in love that way.
I 100% agee. I think a part of y'alls problem is that you have different interests and do your own thing.
I just finished reading a book called "His Needs, Her Needs (Building an Affair Proof Marriage)" and I highly recommend it. It even has a quiz of sorts at the end to see what your top 5 and your spouses top 5 needs are. Making sure these are met.
One of the biggest things the author touches on is that in order for a man and woman to continue to be compatible they MUST have mutual interests and make time to do them together. If you or your husband meet your "interest" needs with other people and not each other, you will grow apart and it can happen that you or him will grow closer to other people.
It also talks about how men need sex, while women need affection, and explains the difference between the two, which may help him understand if you desire more physical affection. I think it would be a GREAT book for both of you to read together. It most definitely led to some in depth conversations with my husband.
It seems like one of your "needs" is to have him appreciate you and your effort in looking great for him. Perhaps you can show him appreciation for him things you like about him, and what he does, and see if he returns the favor? I know since reading the book, I have definitly started doing that in my own marriage, and have seen a total change in how my husband and I have been interacting.
I'm sorry you feel down about him not showing you the "love" for all you have accomplished with your appearance and weight loss. I hope something I wrote here will help in some way and you see some changes that make you smile!