View Single Post
Old 01-15-2013, 12:22 PM   #13
Starting over sucks.
Radiojane's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,245

S/C/G: 485/445/250

Height: 6'1


Originally Posted by bethFromDayton View Post
You've done incredible work so far--do you give yourself enough credit for that? Do you find it's already easier to get around?

Unfortunately, it isn't easy to lose weight and it isn't fair that some of us have to watch what we eat and others don't seem to. (Although they probably do more than we notice.) And it isn't fair it takes so long and it's so much work!

A funk is perfectly normal--you've been make sacrifices, you'll have to keep making sacrifices to lose more and keep making sacrifices to maintain that weight. And it's not happening as fast as you want it to, even if it is happening at a measurable rate.

I've been reading Beck's Diet Solution (How to Train Your Mind to Think Like a Thin Person). One of the things she tells us to do is write down the advantages of being at your desired weight/thin. Read that twice a day, thinking about how important each of those things are to you. (I really recommend her book--and I'm only a week or so in to it--it's a daily activity workbook.)

You've lost 1/3 of your goal--that's HUGE. You've done it in less than 7 months. That's HUGE, too. Give yourself credit for all you've done. There's a tremendous change in your face. I'm sure there's a tremendous change in your body, too, but you aren't giving yourself credit for it because you're not done. And you're not done--you're on a journey. And even if you've derailed a little bit, you can get back on that journey. A little detour doesn't mean you have to stop and stay at the detour.

And if you're a little upset with your friend who didn't put you in the wedding party because of your weight, IMO, you have reason to be hurt. My BFF is a 4x/5x. So when I got married 6 years ago, we found her dress first, since it was the hardest one to find. Your friend prioritized a dress selection--and that's hurtful.

Those are my ramblings for now. If you're interested in Beck, pick up the book--it's based on a cognitive behavior therapy, applied to weight loss and weight management.

You've been doing this--you can keep doing it.
Thank you. And yes, I am going to look for the book, it sounds exactly like what I need. I do get around better. My big nsv for the week is I can sit with one leg crossed over the other. I'm no longer scrambling for clothes because I'm in the last size the store carries. I can bend over at the waist and still breathe! I have to remember these things. As for that bride, it was pretty hurtful. And I think I'm still mad enough to keep going and show up in something focus stealing (I wouldn't of course even if I could, but what nice revenge fantasy )

Originally Posted by berryblondeboys View Post
It is hard to stay in the mental side of the game. I will also say, no one gets morbidly obese without serious food issues. It's not just about eating a bit too much at Christmas. It's obvious we use food for something other than nutritional purposes. THAT needs to be fixed/healed so that you don't regain.
Exactly. Worded perfectly. I think that's why I've been so successful this time, because I understand it isn't about a dress size, and it's not a temporary thing where I eat carrot sticks for six months and then go back to the burgers.

Originally Posted by gailr42 View Post
I know what you mean about little cheats, and falling off the wagon. I was having feelings of impending doom about approaching the diet cliff myself.

Perhaps I may have averted the fall, just for now. I stayed glued to 3FC, I read my diet books and talked to myself a lot. I kept weighing everyday and I have pretty much finished off the the holiday goodies. I think I might be back on track now. I can't tell you what a relief and a joy this little victory is.

I am probably 40 years older than you are and I have failed to avoid the "cliff" numerous times, so I am not just tossing off a simplistic solution for you. I don't know exactly what it was that allowed me to get back on track this time, or how long it will last. I am just saying that if you can get a grip, you will feel wonderful. I have lost what I gained over the holidays and am back to about 1/32 of a pound lighter than my previous low, but who's counting? LOL. It is sort of a non-scale victory.

You need to do this. I read your posts about your father and his early death due to obesity. You don't want that for you. I don't have as much weight to loose as you do, but my family is full of women who died of heart disease and I am getting to the age where that kicks in. I already have pretty high blood pressure. I want to see my grandchildren grow up. [/pep talk to both of us]
You're very right, and I think part of the reason I'm kicking my own *** today is that I know that mentally it should be enough of a motivator, but I'm a human.

Radiojane is offline   Reply With Quote