[Renwomin]

As I write this I'm at my heaviest weight ever at 280 pounds. Just a little over 2 years ago I was 80 pounds lighter after my last big weight loss. It is almost staggering for me to consider that. There are so many pressing reasons for me to lose weight:

-High Blood Pressure
-Sleep Apnea
-High Cholesterol
-PCOS
-Health risks increase with Age
-Having more and more major back problems / sciatica
-Heaviest weight I've been ever, out growing clothes
-For the first time I'm heavier than my husband who is making positive changes
-Girlfriend of same size just had weight loss surgery
-Afraid extra weight is going to hamper efforts to find good new job
-Don't want to be as social or meet new people as much
-Starting to feel as if I can do less with this extra weight

Even with all these incredibly compelling reasons to make positive life changes, I just am so discouraged. I control what I eat every single day and I wonder why I haven't been able to motivate myself to make better choices. Ignorance is not a problem here, I know a lot about health, nutrition, and calories from research from my last attempts.

I just wonder.. When is enough going to be enough? When am I going to be able to lose weight and keep it off? What is it going to take for me to start again?

[LockItUp]

I've been in your shoes!

Back in 2005/2006 I went from 193 pounds down to 142 pounds. It was amazing. Within a year I was back to 193 pounds. Then my husband and I had a baby. I lost all my baby weight over the next 18 months, but then we had another baby and found myself at 236 pounds at the end of that pregnancy, that was December 2011, so just barely a year ago! This past March I was feeling just awful, semi-depressed, and definitely hopeless about my weight. I was so angry with myself for throwing away all of my hard work and gaining it all back PLUS a lot more. I wasn't sure I could do it again, like if I really had it in me.

I woke up one morning (March 22nd, 2012) and decided that this is my LIFE and I refuse to be miserable in my own skin anymore. It's been a lot of hard work and commitment, but so worth it.

In short, what it will take is for you to decide that enough is enough is a personal thing. Sometimes you just have to make the commitment to yourself and not wait for some event. If you are unhappy in the body you currently have, it is within your power to change that!!! That is the good news!

[StephanieM]

LockItUp, we have almost the same story! Except I went from 194 to 146 and felt great, gained about 20 back then had a 60 lb pregnancy and gave birth to my daughter in Dec 2011.

I was the heaviest I have ever been at 224 lbs and I felt so bad about myself. I did all this work to lose weight and here I was fatter then ever.

Over this past year I've lost almost 56 lbs though. I made the decision that I didn't want to live my life heavy and I *needed* to lose the weight. I need to be exercising regularly and eating well.

For everyone it's different, we all have our own motivation. If you want it bad enough you will do it!

[Moondance]

I don't know...when IS it enough? Only you can answer that.

Being fat is hard. Losing weight is hard. Keeping the status quo doesn't force you to take a hard look at yourself, your issues, and your behavior. Losing weight does.

Where do you want to be one year from now? If you do nothing, you'll be at the weight you are (or more). Or you could be 10-30-50 pounds lighter.

The choice is up to you. You have complete control.

[Renwomin]

Thanks for the replies. I realize that the motivation and decision is going to come from me. I'm just baffling at myself mostly. I don't understand why this is so hard for me and I NEED to understand it. Unfortunately the more times I lose weight and gain it back the more defeated I feel. It makes me wonder what is going to make the difference this time. How can I succeed for good?

[Missy Krissy]

How to succeed for good? Tough question, and one I can't answer from experience yet!

Besides wanting it bad enough, I think that there are a few thing that you might be able to do to help stay on track. Some suggestions:

- Start small! Make gradual, healthy changes that you can sustain for life.

- Reward yourself! For every 20 pounds I lose I give myself a spa treatment (no food rewards for me). After reaching my goal I intend to give myself some sort of spa treatment for every 3-6 months of maintenance.

- Keep track. Start a food journal/weigh loss log. Record your thoughts, your weight, how eating this made you feel, or how often you excercise. Let it be a record of your triumphs, so that when you get discouraged you can see in black and white how far you've come.

I hope my advice is somewhat helpful. Good luck, and {{hugs}}.

[susiefleshner]

I have walked your shoes a million times. I know how and what your feeling. For me the light bulb moment was multiple things. High Blood pressure,High Cholesterol, I was on Metformin. I wanted to lose weight so bad...but didn't want to put the work into it.

Last spring my sister lost her husband to a massive heart attach. His blood pressure was out of control and he had really high Cholesterol. The months following his death my sister had lost 40lbs cause she didn't want to end up like her husband. My sister losing weight brought out some jealousy in me. Here I was still fat and gaining weight while she was getting thin and healthy. So between the combination of my own health problems and my jealousy(I'm not proud of this) i descided last summer I was going to make changes in my life. I'm proud to say that i'm nearing the 100lbs mark. As the weight starting coming off i became and still find motivation from it. I want to be healthy and feel/look good. I can do so much more now than i ever could being my heaviest. I know you can do this and you can succeed. I'm so happy i found this forum. I'm overwelmed by the amount of support that is given here. I'm proud to be a member here. We are here for you.

[elvislover324]

I kept thinking to myself "tomorrow I will go on a diet, tomorrow I won't eat chips, tomorrow I won't have pizza for dinner". That went on for years and years and I got bigger and bigger. I thought I was so smart when I went to my doctor and said I didn't want to be weighed and refused to get on the scale. And my doctor never mentioned my weight either (it was obvious I was so big to both of us). Long story short, I had to have a medical procedure that required anesthesia so they needed my weight for the drugs. The scale was in kilograms (maybe for privacy?) so I remembered the weight and then did the conversion on my phone. I almost threw up. The medical procedure led to an unexpected cancer diagnosis (they found it by mistake looking at something else, thank the Lord). So in my case, pretty much the next couple of weeks after that was my "enough is enough". I had so many regrets on the years I wasted stuffing my face and not enjoying family functions, get togethers at places I wouldn't look good or fit in (beaches, amusement parks, etc.), not being a part of my brother's wedding party as I wouldn't fit in the dress the pretty bridesmaids did, but none of those things made me want to change my habits. Cancer sure did though.

I hope you find your "enough is enough" reason sooner than later. I never felt better than I have lately, I am on a mission to be healthy and now, I am happier. Not that weightloss can make you happy but I feel so positive for my future even with the long cancer journey ahead of me. And this forum helped me change my life, I couldn't be more thankful.

[freelancemomma]

Originally Posted by Renwomin

How can I succeed for good?

I think there are two mental steps involved here. First, you have to reach a point where carrying the extra weight is more painful to you than losing it. Second, you have to teach your brain to realistically appraise the short-term pleasure of eating your fill compared to the long-term fulfilment of achieving your weight-loss goals. That's not an easy thing to do, because our brains are wired to favour short-term gratification.

Once you bring these processes into awareness -- that is, once you know your enemy -- you'll be in a better position to stick to your plan.

As I said, it's far from easy. That's why so many of us (raising hand here) have lost and regained many times.

Freelance
blog: www.englishgrammargripe.com

[NJChick78]

Most of us have been there. There is so much hurt we have suffered. There is so much hurt we have caused ourselves. There is no magic pill, no magic diet, nothing that can just solve our problem with food.

It is so easy to chew on a 500 calorie slice of pizza. It is so very hard to lose a pound. We have to take this one bite at a time. One walk at a time. We need to realize that we are WORTHY to live, we are WORTHY to look pretty, we are WORTHY to be healthy. We are all worthy.

We do not need to just "lose weight" we all need to gain love for ourselves, gain health, gain self respect.

[elvislover324]

Originally Posted by NJChick78

Most of us have been there. There is so much hurt we have suffered. There is so much hurt we have caused ourselves. There is no magic pill, no magic diet, nothing that can just solve our problem with food.

It is so easy to chew on a 500 calorie slice of pizza. It is so very hard to lose a pound. We have to take this one bite at a time. One walk at a time. We need to realize that we are WORTHY to live, we are WORTHY to look pretty, we are WORTHY to be healthy. We are all worthy.

We do not need to just "lose weight" we all need to gain love for ourselves, gain health, gain self respect.

Loved this reply.

[Mozzy]

Speaking from personal experience only, my "enough is enough" point came out of the blue. I literally woke up one morning and decide to make a change. No health scares or traumatizing events.
Every hits rock bottom at a different place. But I had to hit rock bottom in order to mentally be ready to commit to change.

Good luck on your journey!

[KittyKatFan]

I really believe that one has to hit bottom before they can accept and commit to long-term weight loss.

For some, hitting bottom happens when the significant other admits that he/she no longer finds you attractive. For others, it's a major health incident, either their own or a family member who is overweight. Still others hit bottom when some embarrassing or uncomfortable weight-related incident happens. Or they lose their job and can't get a new one possibly due to obesity.

For me, it was definitely fear for my health, coupled with the scary realization that I could no longer purchase clothes that fit anymore. I had my gall bladder removed and I suspect that the problem occurred as a result of years of abusing my body. I couldn't walk 100 feet in my place of work without getting winded. I could barely fit in my own car's driver seat, let alone an airplane seat - even in first class.

I have to dress somewhat professionally for work, and was up to a size 32. And those were getting tight. I feared that I would not even be able to find clothing that fit before long. That was scary.

I just knew that I had to make major changes, so on July 18, 2011, I did just that and have been committed to better health ever since.

[Vex]

Good question - that's the same question I asked myself since maybe 20 years old as I remained overweight. I'm 42 now. I spent over half of my life more than just a little overweight. Most of those reasons you listed, I could list.

What happened when I was 41? What was the trigger that said that's it? I started having chest pains and would constantly picture my 11 year old son without me.

Turns out that my heart is fine, but I will never let go of that fear that propelled me to make the change.

I do believe what someone said about triggers - that there's a trigger that most people finally say, that's it. The trick is, I think, to keep the trigger fresh in your mind throughout and past your weight loss.

Why did you lose that 80 lbs? Whatever reason that was, you've got to hold on to it the entire time you're losing and even after you're done.

[sassyangies]

We have all been there .. I have not even lost that much weight yet and I still am scared to death that I'm not going to make it through this and go back to my old ways. In my head I have to treat it as a disease. I have to treat it as if I don't do this I WILL die and I don't want to die. Someone on this board told me "you just have to make the decision" to eat the right foods, excersise, and put your health first. That's so hard for me. I'm only 10days in, but we have to just do it and keep on doing it. This time next year you'll be glad you "decided" to do it..

Come on girl! WE can do this!