Need Help with Re-motivation! - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

mottainai · 10-11-2012, 08:42 PM

Basically: what do you guys do to get back into losing weight after rebounding?

Earlier this year, I lost quite a bit of weight, partially because of having lots of support from my husband and lots of time to focus on dieting (at the time, neither of us were working or going to school and basically spent the whole day together). But recently, I've started at university, which means being out of the house and on my own. Unfortunately, I have a big problem with emotional/boredom binge eating, especially when I'm alone, and I've regained a LOT.

I desperately want to lose the weight I regained, plus what was remaining before my final goal, but I'm finding it very difficult to get motivated. When I look at myself, I feel so depressed...it was hard being fat before, but now that I've had a "taste" of being thinner, it's twice as awful. I feel like I'm just fixated on the past so much that I can't move forward! It kind of creates a cycle too-- I feel bad about my weight, which leads to binge eating to cope with those bad feelings, which leads to more weight gain...etc.etc.etc.

So, I really would just love to hear some advice or encouragement for getting back on track again after regaining weight you've already lost. I'm pretty depressed and desperate at this point! Please, anything will help. (:

LockItUp · 10-11-2012, 08:57 PM

Welcome!

This is a hard thing to give advice on, it's a little different for everyone. You kind of have to be in that "ready" state. If you can kind of fake it till you make it, start right away! Don't have one last meal, or one last day, just start right this second. For every single success (a good meal, passing up food when you aren't hungry) give yourself credit.

I had a very large regain, from 142 pounds. . . I started this journey after having my 2nd baby in December at 236 pounds (and a high non-pregnant weight of 220). I was very depressed and terribly mad at myself for allowing it to happen. I had to decide to stop punishing myself further and make the changes I wanted to badly! I made that decision March 22nd, 2012, and I have come a LONG way since then. I didn't want to waste another second being miserable in my own skin when I had full control over it.

Those little decisions start building upon each other.

You can do this! You deserve to have the body that you want!

elizurofsinai · 10-11-2012, 09:34 PM

I agree with lockitup,
I had tried plenty of times to stick to eating healthy, and I failed everytime..until I was finally ready and tired of being unhappy with my unhealthy weight. I decided one day that it was time. Don't get me wrong, I have still had days where I sat down and cried because I wasn't seeing results that I wanted. But now I understand that even though I had a bad day, or even a bad week, I can still make it to my goal. What really helps me when I'm feeling really down, is to look at the goal posts on this forum.. seeing all of the people that didn't give up, and are at their goal weight really helps me to get back on track.

stimkovs · 10-11-2012, 10:16 PM

so you ate a couple of cookies? who cares!!

one good decision at a time.

the food will always be there- you can have it tomorrow.

love your body. respect it. notice your feelings of being "bloaty" of being lethargic, full, etc.

i'm having a rough time right now- but the glass is ALWAYS half full. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS. Why you ask? because how can a glass be half empty if it's not half full?

One choice at a time. it's around 10 pm now, i'm assuming it's almost bed time. i'm also assuming you've had dinner. here's what the doctor ordered. 1 glass of water, brush your teeth, and get ready for bed. see? there! you've succeeded already, you stayed out of the fridge!

tomorrow, wake up, have your preferred morning beverage of choice. what do you usually have? a coffee? a little splenda a little skim milk? a black tea? if you don't drink your calories, that's another little victory point!

skip the pancakes, have something sensible like oatmeal or eggwhites for breakfast. see? another good choice.

one good choice at a time.

made a "not so perfect" choice? that's okay- your next choice can be a good one! remember how these 'poor" choices make you feel, and strive better. every time!

chip up beautiful =)

mottainai · 10-11-2012, 10:34 PM

Wow, I wasn't expecting so many great responses so quickly! Thanks, everyone.

It sounds like stopping being angry with myself is something I need to do...but it's very hard. I feel so bad and guilty that I let my hard work go to waste, all those days of losing weight! I guess I need to stop fixating on the past and just concentrate on the present..?

One good decision at a time, that's good to remember. I have a tendency to only want to see the big picture, and if everything's not perfect, then that's it for me, lol. I'm really going to try taking it one day at a time. At least tomorrow, I'll not hate myself for being fat and just concentrate on doing what I can that day to feel good!

I had been too nervous to step on the scale for the past few weeks..maybe that was a mistake, because just by looking in the mirror I couldn't tell too much how much I gained. It was more just a feeling. But I just checked, and my weight was around 57 kg. Gosh, that's way more than I even could have guessed. Just a month plus ago I was nearly 50 kg! I also tried wearing some of my older clothes...fitting way differently. ): OH well, nothing to do about it now, I guess! Let's just start from here....

And thanks again for the encouraging responses, everyone! Looks like this forum will be a great resource!

LaurieDawn · 10-12-2012, 02:54 AM

These are great responses.

Just wanted to add one thing. I, too, had lost a lot of weight - almost 100 pounds - before an extreme gain. But it was not wasted effort. I learned so much about loss and maintenance, and know that I actually can do it. You are way ahead of the game because of it.

Let's get 'er done!

JossFit · 10-12-2012, 05:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mottainai

I feel so bad and guilty that I let my hard work go to waste, all those days of losing weight!

It absolutely was not a waste! You learned how to stick to a plan, how to workout and eat for successful weight loss. Heck, even your gain was a lesson learned; you learned how easy it can be to gain it back, how it makes you feel about yourself, and that ignoring it does not make it go away.

Now, take those lessons you learned and go apply them again!

mottainai · 10-12-2012, 12:54 PM

Oh, that's true, I guess-- I did get some lessons learned out of it, especially about how easy it is to gain back!

As soon as I got thinner, close to what I weighed in high school, I immediately reverted to my old eating habits that I had back then, which involved large quantities of food, unfortunately. Except that now, I am not as physically active as I was back then, and I also was eating a little bit desperately, having just come off the diet, I think. So it's no wonder I re-gained! This time, I definitely know I need to be more careful, not just assume I can eat how much ever of whatever just because I'm thin.

To be honest, I'm having a real hard time this morning not giving in!! I feel so uncomfortable, after making it out to the gym finally again only to realize how much tighter my workout clothes are now, and seeing myself in the mirror.... I am so close to going out and buying a bunch of junk to binge on....but instead, at least for now, I'm writing about it and trying to wait out the next couple hours, until I won't have the time to sit around eating.

Prestige · 10-12-2012, 01:52 PM

I love how eager everyone is to offer insight and advice. It's definitely awe inspiring. For me, when I'm ready to kick back into gear I go to youtube. That might sound silly, but that was how I stumbled upon a eating regiment/diet that worked for me last Winter. Listening to other's testimonies really inspires me. Though there are plenty of tv shows to turn to for some inspiration, I love watching REAL people tell you how they had a bad week because they ate cookies and decided to not work out because they just didn't feel like it. It's being able to relate to those women (I usually watch chicks), that help get me all pumped up and cranked in preparation for the next round.

You already did an amazing thing by pushing yourself to get up and go. XD Keep up the good work my dear! Though you may have originally lacked some motivation, keep in mind that you might just be someone else's inspiration. <3

Missy Krissy · 10-12-2012, 02:38 PM

You know, you're ahead of the game because you've already identified your triggers that cause you to over-eat and you sound like you really "know" yourself.

You mentioned that you were coming off of a diet, and I'm curious, which one? It's hard for me to think about, but for me personally I know that I will probably not ever be able to eat intuitively and lose/maintain weight, because my food intuition is totaly shot (I'm an over-eater), so the plan I'm on today is going to have to be more than a diet, it has to be a lifestyle change.

mottainai · 10-12-2012, 03:05 PM

Missy Krissy - I say "diet" just in the general sense of eating a certain way in order to lose weight. I followed just kind of a personal plan of guidelines, things like: no snacks after dinner, do some exercise every day, only one bowl of rice at dinner, etc. So coming off my "diet" just meant forgetting those rules; but I just went too far, to eating whatever I wanted with no restraint basically, including letting myself binge eat...

Missy Krissy · 10-12-2012, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mottainai

Missy Krissy - I say "diet" just in the general sense of eating a certain way in order to lose weight. I followed just kind of a personal plan of guidelines, things like: no snacks after dinner, do some exercise every day, only one bowl of rice at dinner, etc. So coming off my "diet" just meant forgetting those rules; but I just went too far, to eating whatever I wanted with no restraint basically, including letting myself binge eat...

Ah, I see. It's easy for me to lose restraint too.

mottainai · 10-12-2012, 08:55 PM

Well, I made it through another day OK! Goodness, I wanted to binge like all day, lol. Glad I didn't now. Just have to avoid the post dinner snacks after this.
I didn't do my regular amount of working out or stick perfectly to a good diet, but at least I made it a couple days not completely going crazy. I'm actually starting to feel a little more motivated to start getting serious again starting next week!