Thanks for the support, I'm still working at it.
Just be good and kind to yourself right now. Don't get too hung up on a number, just feed your body good, whole foods. If you can find something else to feed your emotions, do that. I kept a journal for a long time, and it helped immensely. I tend to keep things bottled up, so it was one place I could be anything I wanted. Angry, depressed, happy, badass or fragile. No judgement when you are writing for yourself. Even now I'm very emotionally repressed, and trying to figure out how to channel all that emotion into movement instead of food.
Keep looking forward to what you want, and remember that you deserve good things.