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Old 02-29-2012, 08:23 AM   #1  
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Default Jealous of co-workers gastric bypass!

Why?? Why am i feeling this way over someone at work that just came back after gastric bypass. I want to be thin sooo badly, however my bmi does not quite meet the surgery. But then i think, why am i jealous, their lives drastically change right? There are many restrictions right?

I guess i want a quick fix and have to realize that life isn't about a quick fix. I've always thought that if i was thin i would be SO much happier. I watched My 600 lb Life and one of the girls said it perfect. She said, "I thought i would be so happy thin on the outside but it doesn't matter unless you're ok on the inside with yourself."

So why do i care so much so stupid!!! Anyone else feel this way?
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Old 02-29-2012, 09:33 AM   #2  
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Your not the only one!! My sister in law had it in september and has lost 100lbs!! Went from a 20 to a 4 already and from what im seeing (and i know every case is different) this was totally the easy way out for her. Yes there are restrictions, like no sugar, alchohol and other certain things you cant eat for a long time. She had t o drink nasty protein drinks and take lots of vitamins. Other than that it has been a freaking breeze for her. She is never hungry, doesn't crave anything. She doesnt even like food anymore and it doesnt bother her. What makes me mad is she told everyone that she tried so hard to diet but i know differently (i babysat her kids for a year) so i was there all the time when she at whataburger every morning before work and chik-fil-a etc..all while she was "trying hard" at weight watchers.

UGH it makes me so mad that i'm busting my but to lose weight and she did nothing but have some surgery...
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Old 02-29-2012, 09:42 AM   #3  
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That's how i feel. I'm happy for her but i know because i'm friends with her that she loses weight like it's nothing. I think that's what bothers me the most, there is no effort and i bust my butt to no end to lose .6 lbs at weigh in lol! She had to lose 10 for the surgery....she did it in like a week!! I'm surprised it doesn't take more requirements before giving the surgery like having to really try on your own.
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:11 AM   #4  
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My cousin just had bypass in Dec. and has lost 45 lbs already. I'm extremely happy for her. Like myself she's battled with weight since she was little and now we're getting to an age where it isn't about looks anymore it's about quality of life and not dying at a young age. I ended up with the diabetes and she didn't but I know we are both a heart attack looking for a place to happen. I don't see her surgery as an easy way out at all. I see it as a life saving procedure. It takes a lot of courage to have this surgery. I'm doing WW and have lost 12 lbs since Jan. 29th so I'm doing it my way. I see it as quitting smoking. Some go cold turkey. Some use the patch. The end result is the same. Healthy living. I know I'm going to have sagging skin after losing 140 lbs myself but as I saw someone post once. I'd rather stuff sagging skin into skinny jeans then a fat belly into fat jeans. I'll have sugery some day but I know that unless I address the emotional part of my heavy life, then losing weight isn't going to fix those issues. She had to go to counseling for 6 mths AND lose 50 lbs before the surgery. Some people think that is to show that she can lose the weight and eat healthy to maintain the loss but the surgeon said it was to lose the fat from the liver so they could push it aside during surgery. I love watching her progress in pictures. I picture myself doing the same only in my own way. We're both in our 50's and we've spent all our life trying this diet and that diet and never getting ahead. This time I'm not losing for looks I'm losing so I don't die young.
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:12 AM   #5  
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I know several people that have had the surgery and I have to say I've never really been jealous of them. Mainly because of the restrictions, issues some had, some gained it all back (one girl still ate so much in her first year after the surgery that she had to go back in and have it redone) and of course the saggy skin from losing weight so fast.

In my opionion, a lot (not all) of the people do use WLS as a quick fix. I do think some are at such a high weight and so unhealthy that they need something so dramatic. BUT if they don't change their lifestyle it's really not going to matter that much in the long run.

I've tried the quick route with diet pills and I've learned that I'd much rather work hard and lose the weight slowly. If I gave weight loss my all - 110% - and I couldn't lose THEN I would consider WLS. But I know I haven't given it my all. Even now, I know I could give more - but at least I am seriously trying and suceeding and looking at food differently than ever before.
And I'm not saying just because I'm doing it slowly that I won't have saggy skin. I've been overweight so long I don't see how I can not have some. But I am hoping losing slowly and exercise will help to minimize the amount of sag as opposed to losing quickly.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you find yourself being jealous of your CW remind yourself of all the advantages of losing the weight with hard work and dedication, how much healthier it is and how proud you can be of yourself for reaching your goal weight. :-)
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:29 AM   #6  
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I've never felt that way about gastric bypass. I would NEVER want to have to undergo surgery and the possibility of dying rather than do WW. Wouldn't want the scarring and the pain. They literally get to eat like 1 cracker a meal after their surgery (my aunt had it done and then gained it all back).
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:31 AM   #7  
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ANGA...My sentiments exactly.
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:46 AM   #8  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pointspluspioneer View Post
She said, "I thought i would be so happy thin on the outside but it doesn't matter unless you're ok on the inside with yourself."
I can say, for myself, that is 100% accurate.

This is my 3rd time on WW. Why? Because the first two times I did it, my goal was to be thin so I could be happy. Only it doesn't work that way and after 6 months (both times) I felt just as unhappy as before and I lost all motivation.

This time around I've been on WW for 13 months and only feel more motivated each time. Because *this* time it's not about being thin, it's about being healthy (with the weight loss as a bonus). And this time, I am okay on the inside and know I'm not defined by my weight, whatever the number.
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Old 02-29-2012, 10:57 AM   #9  
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I am ok with doing it on my own, i just have such a hard time once i plateau, which is very quick. It's like my body doesn't lose the weight and will not let go. My boyfriend's brother had the surgery a few years ago and sadly is back to 400 lbs. He never mentally changed and his eating habits remained the same. I know if were me, i would bust my butt to do it correctly for the rest of my life!!!

I know people do it for health reasons and to live longer but who doesn't also do it to physically look better? I certainly would. I guess i've just been longing to be thin forever and feel i'll never get there as i've been doing ww on and off for 10 years.
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Old 02-29-2012, 11:14 AM   #10  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tudor Rose View Post
And this time, I am okay on the inside and know I'm not defined by my weight, whatever the number.
This is what i've been striving for forever! My therapist and I work on this monthly! I can't wait to get there! I think about the surgery and all the restrictions and like others have said, i don't want the complications, the lack of certain foods and other stuff that doesn't seem so pleasant I also want to get pregnant and that's a double edged sword because i wouldn't think it's healthy to lack certain food while pregnant but i don't want to get pregnant at this weight.
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Old 03-01-2012, 10:30 PM   #11  
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I understand how you feel completely! My x husband's new wife had it done last yr and has lost over a hundred lbs. While, I'm a lil jealous at times I keep in mind that she can't have alcohol, certain foods and most of all she can't enjoy a whole meal in one sitting. I'm sorry, but I love to have a margarita at times or enjoy a slice of cheesecake lol. I too have been on and off ww's a bunch of times but I will keep on trying with all my might until I get to goal!! She can never enjoy life the way it should be so with that being said we are all better off with ww's
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Old 03-02-2012, 11:42 AM   #12  
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A friend of mine is going to have it done, and it really pisses me off. She's a big girl, bigger than I am, but she's never (by her own admission) tried eating healthy for longer than a week. She "doesn't like dieting" so she's going to get this done instead. She sees it as a quick fix and doesn't quite understand the bigger picture - that if she doesn't fix her bad habits, nothing is going to work in the long run.
While I'm not jealous of her having the surgery because I wouldn't want it, I know that I'm going to be jealous of her losing tons of weight pretty quickly while I'm struggling to lose 1-2 pounds a week.

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Old 03-02-2012, 01:17 PM   #13  
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Slow and steady wins the race, don't you remember the tortise and hare?? Yes, it does get frustrating, but you are learning along the way what works for you. With WLS you don't get that. You get told "this is how you need to do it." Just remember, you didn't put on the weight overnight, so how can you expect to lose it over night!
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:40 PM   #14  
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I also watched "my 600 pound life" and the woman they had on there had to have so many surgeries after the gastric bypass. She had a scar that went almost all the way around her waist when they had to cut the excess skin off her stomach. Then they had to cut it off her thighs. I would personally rather tighten my skin and muscles as i lose. They also had a guy on there that got down to 200 pounds and never worked hard enuf to get out of his wheel chair and walk, then he gained it all back and was still stuck in a wheel chair.
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:42 PM   #15  
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A family friend had it done within the last year, and her "meals" had to fit inside a Tylenol dosage cup for quite a while. Heck no! On top of that, all the food restrictions, protein shakes, etc- if I wanted a regimented diet plan, I could do all that without the risky surgery. She lost a TON of weight, and yeah, I was jealous because I was losing it slooooooooooowly on WW and it frustrated me, but she's got ridiculous amounts of loose skin, and it looks kinda silly. She had a tummy tuck to get rid of the hanging belly, and almost died within 24 hours after surgery because of blood loss... AND she's got some scary looking scars. I'd rather lose it slowly, and reduce the chance of loose skin. Plus, she's back to eating/drinking ridiculous amounts/types of food she shouldn't be eating, so I'm betting she'll be back to square one at some point.. all that money spent & life-threatening drama for naught.
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