I remember feeling like I wanted someone else to look after my responsibilities, motivate me, take care of me etc. but in reality that would be **** ah its the old if things get too difficult I'll just detach mentally. Its been a dangerous way of coping to me.
I came out of it many a time, I think it was anxiety about running out of money I'd make a plan and then the cycle would start over, I never saw my weight until i was on film, with eating I forgot what I would have eaten an hour before it was horribly unfulfillng.
So its stopped now, mostly. I moved into my own flat and noticed how if I cleaned up I'd feel pretty low about doing it but felt better after, I talked about this with my counselor it was like a hey moment, I do something I don't like for a short period and feel better/less worried for most of the time rather than pushing out what I don't want to do feel worse for longer.
IT must be said there are circumstances where the brain cannot manage and cope it dissociates for survival and continues to, day by day, its okay to have a bad day think of one task at a time.
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