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Old 01-13-2012, 09:52 AM   #1  
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Angry How can I make it all about me me me?

I have a problem not making myself a priority. I had not been able to see this before, but now that I'm thinking about it I see how much of an obstacle that is for my weight loss goal. I keep thinking that I'm going to have more time to work out once I get my closet organized, my kitchen remodeled, my living room decorated, etc. The chores never end and the demands from my kids and other family members never end either. I need help learning how to make myself a priority!!!! I work a full-time job, so I have to find time to work out either before or after work. The problem is that there is always something going in my life that takes priority over my exercise. I need to stop this once and for all. Any ideas?
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Old 01-13-2012, 09:56 AM   #2  
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Is it that you truly feel the other things are more important, or that they are subconsciously an excuse not to work out?

For me, it is the latter.

If it is really that you look at everything that needs doing and feel that exercise is low on the list, maybe you can try alternative times. What about getting up an hour early to work out?
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:00 AM   #3  
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I don't know if this would work for you, but I work out at lunch. There's no realistic way I'm going to get up early to work out because I don't get enough sleep as it is. And I'm tired when I get home. I'm lucky to have a fitness room in my office building. I do weights and physical therapy exercises. But even if you don't have a fitness room, maybe you could go for a walk every day at lunch time...?
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:02 AM   #4  
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I suggest waking up 30 minutes earlier than usual (ideally before the kids) and get a little exercise in - whether its a walk, a DVD, Wii, Kinect.....anything will work and you'll feel much better.
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:25 AM   #5  
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You just have to find the time. I'm a single mother of 2 young boys (6 and 4)with a full time career. I workout on my lunch. It's my only time. If I couldn't on my lunch it would be first thing in the morning or immediately after work. Cook lots on weekend to carry through the week to ease up on the workload during the week so I can fit it in. Just sit down, go over your schedule and find an hour everyday or every other day, or on weekends. Make it a priority. Even if it means the dishes don't get done for another hour, it's worth it!
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:28 AM   #6  
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Thanks for the input. I know that there is no excuse not to exercise, but for some reason, I always put everything and everybody else ahead of me. I feel guilty because I feel as though I'm not spending enough quality time with my kids as it is, and I don't want to feel guilty any more. There have been a lot of changes in our lives for the past 3 years. My relationship with their father ended, I went back to school, went back to work, then moved to a new city. The move was too much even for me, but I have to somehow find the courage to put myself first and take time to exercise no matter what.

We don't have a workout facility near my office, and it's a small office, so I sit all day long. I haven't found a park nearby yet, but I'm going to keep looking for one so I can at least go for a short walk during lunch time. However, I have noticed that the people who lose weight consistently are those who exercise a lot more than just a little 20 min walk a day. I have an aunt who is a lot older than I am, but she looks a lot younger because she goes to the gym every single day. Absolutely nothing stops her from going to the gym. Not a hungry husband, a sick kid, family visiting from out of town, nothing at all. I want to learn to be more like her and not feel so guilty.
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:51 AM   #7  
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You have to get rid of the guilt. I understand it all to well and it comes even more so when your a single parent. But I have also realized that when I'm happy and when I'm in a good place so are my kids. I take my stress out in my workouts. My frustration gets pounded out in my weights or in my cardio class. I am finding that it's more QUALITY time than QUANTITY. I am in a better place to manage the rest of my life because my body and mind feel so much better. I'm not rushing anymore or freaking out to get things done. Things are falling into place much better cause I'm FEELING better, and I'm much calmer for my kids. Exercise just doesn't help you lose weight it helps with all areas in your life. It really does! I've noticed my short temper, especially with the boys has laxed quite a bit since I started working out. I don't snap as quick as I use to and it's better for all of us. I feel so amazing after a workout I'm in a better space to get home and tackle the homework, the after school sports, the bath and bedtime, the dishes...plus I sleep better and I'm in bed earlier than I was before exercising. You have to plan it. I promise your life will never regret the exercise!
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Old 01-13-2012, 10:53 AM   #8  
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Honestly, you just need to make the time. Carve out a block of time during the day and set it aside for exercise. Everyone is busy but I promise there *is* a block of time in your day that you spend doing something that you don't absolutely *have* to do.

If you're worried about losing time with your children, make exercise a family affair. Exercise doesn't necessarily mean just going to the gym and putting in an hour on the treadmill - it can be a family bike ride, a family hike through the woods, playing a fun and active Wii/Kinect type game, etc.

If it's important, you'll find a way to fit it in. If it's not then you'll find an excuse for not doing it. --- this is what I tell myself about all kinds of things that I know I *should* do but don't necessarily feel motivated to do.
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Old 01-13-2012, 11:01 AM   #9  
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If you are going to use guilt use guilt to make you do it

How are you doing your kids any favors by modeling an unhealthy life for them.
How are you helping your kids by risking your life. You are a single mom, who will take care of them if you can't?
How are you helping your kids by increasing the odds that they will have to take care of you at a time they should be starting their own families.

Do you think your kids care about an organized closet, a remodeled kitchen, or a decorated living room?
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Old 01-13-2012, 11:28 AM   #10  
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Thanks all! You have given me a lot to think about. I love this board!
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Old 01-13-2012, 11:39 AM   #11  
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Totally understand you hun.......i always feel like ive got to do the chores forst then i never find time for me things and exercise.

Ive decided now that if ive made a promise to myself to work out then the dishes/hovering will have to be done afterwards. Instead of first. Its the only way weightloss will start happening when we start putting our selfs first
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Old 01-13-2012, 11:41 AM   #12  
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You didn't say how old the kids are, but it's amazing how much you can get them to do to help with simple chores like folding laundry and putting toys away. Just don't fall into the temptation to do it over if it isn't perfect. Quality time is any time you spend doing things together. It can be exercising in the form of running and jumping with them. Sometimes you just have to do it.

Talk to your aunt and see how she balances things. Once you set a routine, I'm sure it will get easier. Good luck with this. You have to be healthy first. Everything else will fall into place.

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Old 01-13-2012, 11:46 AM   #13  
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OR...in a pinch you can always do my house cleaning blast workout on a saturday. It's what I do when I dont want to workout and I dont want to clean and I am procrastinating both. I set the timer for 10 minutes and powerclean. When the timer goes off I do pushups and burpees. 10 minutes cleaning. Chair dips and jumping jacks. 10 minutes etc. etc. etc. I actually get the cleaning done faster because I realize that if I dawdle I will have a few extra sets to do.
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Old 01-13-2012, 11:50 AM   #14  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ennay View Post
OR...in a pinch you can always do my house cleaning blast workout on a saturday. It's what I do when I dont want to workout and I dont want to clean and I am procrastinating both. I set the timer for 10 minutes and powerclean. When the timer goes off I do pushups and burpees. 10 minutes cleaning. Chair dips and jumping jacks. 10 minutes etc. etc. etc. I actually get the cleaning done faster because I realize that if I dawdle I will have a few extra sets to do.
WOW that's awesome! I'm gonna do this! Thanks!
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Old 01-13-2012, 12:04 PM   #15  
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Hi,
I hear your struggle.I had to change my mindset to get the exercise in. Instead of feeling guilty for taking the time I now pencil it in on my calendar as Preventive Health Care.

For some reason I cannot explain, this has helped me make it a priority and works for me.

Good luck. You can do it!!!!!!!

Sheridan
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