It's been a while since I posted here, though I'm always around lurking.
My weight loss is, and has always been, very slow. It's taken me over a year to lose these 55 pounds. And for the last 3 months, I haven't lost anything.
Nada.
My weight bounces around between 313 and 317, but never ever to 312. Though, since I was overweight even as a child, this is all new territory, so I have nothing to compare my journey to.
Maybe it's just TOM talking for me, but I'm so close to just throwing my hands up and quitting that I don't know what to do. I'm not 100% OP at all times, and because of university I don't have the time to use my elliptical like I should (despite splurging on the LS13). (And my other closet full of next-size-down clothes just help me get depressed when I can't wear them yet).
I suppose I just want someone to kick me in the rear and tell me to get back to it. I know most of you are older and much, much wiser than myself, and can help me loads. Sorry for the pity party.
Soft: I'm sorry you're struggling. It's easy to get frustrated when you've hit a plateau. And when exterior things compete for your attention, your weight loss goals are easily pushed down the priority list. You need to love yourself enough to continue the fight. It's totally worth it. YOU are totally worth it! Slow and steady does win the race and TOM certainly may contribute to a slow down. But you can do this!
Hang on...here comes the hard:
Losing weight is hard work. Period. You have to fight through the urge to fall back on old habits. You have to tell yourself no sometimes (maybe a lot at the beginning). If you can't fit "organized" exercise into your day, find smaller things: walk to and from class the long way, take the stairs instead of the elevator, use your backpack like a bag of weights and do lifts while you walk. The possibilities are endless-use your imagination. You want to quit because it's "easier". It's not only tiring physically, but emotionally too. But is it really easier to live in a body that has difficulties? Remember that we've adopted the habits and behaviors we have because at some level they paid off. Challenge those behaviors.
What I do know is that you can do it. Really, you can!! Have you made a pros and cons list on the benefits of losing? If you have, read it again. If not, make one. It helps to refer back to it when you're losing motivation. You need to failproof your life. Don't have unhealthy snacks where you can get to them in a moment of weakness. Make smart choices at the cafeteria (assuming you're on meal plan at University), keep a water bottle with you at all times so you can drink more. Little changes like this, done consistently, can have a big impact over time. Commit to yourself and do it!
Get to goal & stay there!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 849
S/C/G: 235/154.8/150
Height: 5'5"
Lacey, I've felt what you are feeling many times in all my dieting years (too many to count). But try to think about what you have accomplished instead of how far you have to go. What will you accomplish by giving up now? Nothing! You will most likely gain your weight back and be in a worse place. Even if you lose 55 pounds a year (a huge accomplishment by the way) and it takes you 3 more years to do it in, those years are going to go by anyway and quicker than you ever thought. But don't think of the long term...take it one day at a time. Heck, one hour at a time if you have to.
If you are bored with the diet you are following, find another one. I do that every once in a while; although, I mostly stick to higher-protein diets because they work the best for me. But the important thing is to commit to it. And come here as often as you can to help keep motivated. We are all here for you, girl!
Last edited by sandcar150; 11-10-2011 at 12:38 PM.
If you give up, absolutely nothing will change. In fact, things may get worse.
I am also on this journey and I know the feeling. Remember, it's just a feeling. Feelings don't have to determine your actions. Let your actions guide your feelings.
You've done GREAT already. Celebrate your success and you can do this!!!! Sending BIG HUGS your way and cheering you on to goal.
I calorie count, using myfitnesspal, roughly 1900 calories a day. I work full time and go to university. I live at home with others, drink only water, and have a very strong carb addiction.
Yes, the last time I dieted, I lost 17 pounds. Then decided it was too hard. That was four years ago. I gave up, gained back that weight plus another 15-20 pounds.
The time before that was 10 years ago, I lost 30 pounds. Felt pretty & more confident for my sister's wedding. Gave up. Gained all back, plus 50 pounds.
And all the years I've wasted by thinking it was impossible for me to succeed at weight loss. I've 'given up' too much of my life being morbidly obese.
I'm thinking maybe your daily calorie goal is too high for weight loss, if you don't have some pretty significant exercise factored in there too. Probably good range for maintenance, as you've discovered on your own.
Don't give up. Read some posts on this forum. They tend to be very inspirational to me.
First of, congrats for losing that amount of weight. That in itself is a HUGEE accomplishment. And to lose all that and focus on weight loss when your oboviously very busy is amazing. You've prob heard this quote before but i'm going to say it anyways, "In a year you'll be glad you started today."
Option 1) Stop trying to get healthy, and either maintain or gain the weight you loss back
Option 2) Continue on your journey
Which one of these will make you happy in a year?
I know its tough but your just stuck in a plateau. Your current calorie count may be a bit high which is why your maintaining your weight at the moment Whatever it is, just don't give up. Weightloss is prob one of the hardests to accomplish because it takes so much disapline. And if you can do this, you can do anything...I've had plenty of "So frustrated I wanna cry" moments but once you get past those, you just wanna keep going. Remember...You CAN do this. Good luck reaching your goal and I know you will
Thanks so much for all of your encouraging words (especially the hard ones!). I'm not really questioning my plan, I know it works when I follow it 100%. I'm just not having the motivation to do so.
I've calculated my calories frontwards, backwards, and by textbooks, and I show to need roughly 2800 a day to survive. So, I generally try to eat around 1800/1900 a day, but of course when I don't tell myself 'no', the weekends get out of hand.
Actually I know the weekends are my problem. I'm not working or at uni, so I can eat when I want (which is all the time on Saturdays). It's all in my head, so I'm thankful for all of you who're helping me get back on track.
Weight loss is super hard - after 55 lbs and tons of hard work, you probably do need a "break". You are also stressed with university work - everyone imagines students as having an "ideal" life, fun, etc. But, from my point of view, my life was WAY easier when I took a break from studying and began working full-time.
Now, I'm like you, working hard and studying hard.
Maybe it is time for you to maintain.
Maybe you could try something new? Instead of trying to deprive yourself, try finding new healthy ways to feed your strong carb addiction (healthy, filling carbs). Do exercise because you want to, not because you have to.
The thing is, you don't want to underestimate the influence cortisol (produced by stress) has on weight loss.
Honestly, 1900 is not that much and should still result in weight loss - particularly as it seems you have a pretty busy lifestyle between uni and work.
It doesn't have to be all or nothing. You can maintain until you find the energy again to focus on your weight loss completely.
Anyway, just take some time to really reflect on your life. Think about what is most important to you.
Others are helping address your stall - it sounds like you need to be as vigilant on the weekend as you are during the week, and I hope you can find a way to do that.
What I want to add is: don't be disappointed by losing 55 pounds in a year. This is a very respectable overall rate of weight loss - just about a pound a week - it's excellent work that you deserve to be proud of.
So many people assume that if they are not melting away at 3 pounds a week, they are doing something wrong. It's just not so. It takes time to lose a significant amount of weight. There are no two ways around that. Losing 55 pounds in a year is superb - compare it to years you've had in the past, where you've lost nothing or even gained 25 pounds or more, and you are way, way ahead of the game.
I know you are frustrated, but please don't let that be a reason to overlook or dismiss your own achievement.
Signed, someone who has lost at a rate of 50 pounds per year for two years, and couldn't be happier to be >100 pounds smaller than she used to be!
55 lb is AWESOME!!!! You're DOING IT!!! Slow? YES! But DOING IT!!!
In contrast, it's taken me TWO YEARS to lose the 34 lb that I have lost. But I'm NOT giving up! Giving up would only make me fatter, and I DON'T WANT THAT! - so even if I never make it to my goal of 140, being 158 forever & ever is WAY BETTER than being 192!
Also, some great advice that I've gotten here at 3FC, sometimes we just need to "take a break" from dieting. Just work on maintenance for awhile, even if you aren't at goal weight.
So if you find yourself not able to move forward, at least don't move backward! - just "stand still" and breathe for awhile! However long you need to!!!
If you can put your energy into only one thing, "not gaining" is it. The problem with giving up entirely, is that it results not in "no loss" it results in gaining (usually rapid gaining, and gaining MORE than you lost in the first place).
We don't stress "not gaining" as progress. In fact, we tend to think of it as "not losng" and "not losing" as being every bit the failure that gaining is - so we give up entirely and decide "if I'm going to fail anyway, I might as well get to eat what I want."
For decades I dieted this way. When I felt that I didn't have the energy to put into more weight loss, I gave up. I never decided "well, if I can't lose any more, at least I'll focus on not gaining."
Nope, when I got sick of weight loss, I gave up entirely, ate whatever I want, and rapidly gained all the weight back and some extra. Which is why, in a very real way, I "dieted my way" to nearly 400 lbs.
The main difference "this time" is that weight loss actually isn't my main goal. My main goal is "not gaining" and I celebrate every morning that I get on the scale and haven't gained (and if I gain, my goal is "not gaining any more"). That way, I get to celebrate almost every day.
While I'm at this "not gaining" I figure I might as well try (as a secondary goal) to "lose just one more pound." And when THAT happens, I get to really celebrate and that pound becomes one of the ones that I'm workng at "not gaining."
You would be amazed at how this has changed my motivation. I really am rarely tempted to quit, because I'm having such incredible success. More often than not, I do succeed at this "not gaining," and one pound at a time, I've lost 98 lbs. It's taken several years, because I have health issues and compliance problems (I make a lot of food mistakes, and yet I've still been able to lose weight that I couldn't in 4 decades of trying).
Just "not giving up" really is the "secret" to permanent weight loss. It's not putting in tremendous effort (I took the easiest, laziest, smallest change path I could - because I was burned out on decades of maximum effort. I didn't have the strength or will to make huge changes, so I made very tiny, very comfortable ones - and still lost 98 lbs that way).
Just "not giving up." Even spending two years of the last seven with no weight loss at all - but still succeeding in not giving up entirely - making "not gaining" a priority, even when losing, couldn't be.
It's important to remember that keeping weight off is success, even if we haven't lost all we want to. It's a success worth protecting. So instead of thinking slow loss, or no loss as failure, seeing it as successfully maintaining weight loss (whether it's one pound down from your highest weight, or whether it's 200 lbs down). Maintaining loss is a sucess worth celebrating and protecting, even if you never are able to lose another pound.
Have you ever just given up?
Slow and steady does win the race and TOM certainly may contribute to a slow down. But you can do this!
Have you made a pros and cons list on the benefits of losing? If you have, read it again. If not, make one. It helps to refer back to it when you're losing motivation. You need to failproof your life. Don't have unhealthy snacks where you can get to them in a moment of weakness. Make smart choices at the cafeteria (assuming you're on meal plan at University), keep a water bottle with you at all times so you can drink more. Little changes like this, done consistently, can have a big impact over time. Commit to yourself and do it!
Whatever it is, just don't give up. 
