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Old 03-02-2014, 03:59 PM   #1
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I have been losing weight for four years. I have lost over 80 pounds. And still when I look in the mirror all I see is a fat person. I saw a therapist for eight months while losing weight and she told me it could take a long time to reprogram my brain. Does anyone else have this experience?
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Old 03-02-2014, 04:29 PM   #2
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I have a lot of experience going up and down in weight, and that happens to me almost every time. While I am gaining weight, my mind is behind the time and I feel like I am thin (and see thin in the mirror). When I am losing weight, I am much more aware of my lumps and bumps and see myself at a higher weight. It's pretty crazy.

It's a problem in both directions. It makes it harder to avoid gaining weight during maintenance and harder to feel happy with my accomplishments and know when to stop when losing weight. When I was thin for a long time, my mind did have a chance to catch up with my shape, but I'm not usually at the same weight for long enough.
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Old 03-02-2014, 04:50 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by yoyoma View Post
It's a problem in both directions. It makes it harder to avoid gaining weight during maintenance and harder to feel happy with my accomplishments
I totally relate to this.

OP, I've been overweight since childhood. I understand what you're saying. I've lost 50, 75 and 100+ lbs before in my lifetime, and I never really "felt thinner" -- don't get me wrong, I know I was able to move differently, but to me I didn't feel I looked any different than when I was 300 lbs. It's a total mind game. I do find that the few photos I have at this weight fascinate me. So, I'd recommend having some photos taken that you can focus on to really see yourself.

Usually, I immediately began to bounce back up from my lowest weight, and have never maintained for any length of time. This time I've maintained a 135 lb loss (more or less) for around a year. But, it's all consuming. I still feel "deprived" and as if I'm having to try so hard just to maintain. It's discouraging to be so "into it" yet not losing. There's no payoff there, know what I mean?

I had a doctor tell me once that if I couldn't "see" my weight loss that I was doomed to regain it. And, I would say that for the most part that has been true. This time, I feel like I'm hanging on by my fingernails. I still want to lose more, but don't want to sacrifice more to keep losing. Hang in there!
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Old 03-02-2014, 07:22 PM   #4
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I feel thinner until I see photos then, bam! I am fat. At 5'4" I am 152-3, 145 is normal BMI. Yet I can see exactly where I could lose 45 more
Lbs from. So crazy.
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Old 03-02-2014, 07:59 PM   #5
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Shouldn't you be putting your photos up in sequence to see how much weight you've lost. Then at least you could acknowledge how much weight you've lost.

I'm only slightly taller than you and at 152 pounds i'd also still be seeing a fat person and see that i still have some way to go. But whereas once i would want to be as skinny i possibly could, now i am more accepting of imperfections. Certainly you should get used to your imperfections because you will always have them.

Are you at least able to acknowledge that you have made good progress and feel good about it?

This time around, i've so far lost about 20 pounds and i am feeling soooo much better about how i look. I don't want to stop here though.

Also have you done any toning exercise to build muscle. Maybe a form of exercise like yoga would be good for you since it works on the mind as well as the body. And take up mindfulness meditation. This should help you become more accepting and learn how to understand yourself better.

A good one for toning and body awareness is iyengar. You could mix it up with Ashtanga for a more of a cardio work out.

I like iyengar because you work on perfecting the pose which maximises what you can gain from it, the teachers are highly trained and qualified. Strength and flexibility seem to be the key elements but even standing on your head is quite a cardio exercise if you ask me. Although still you have to work quite hard to maintain the pose.

Ashtanga, the class i went to was fast paced and you just have to learn by keeping up and keeping going. So its the antithesis of the former but still no doubt good for you.

Most yoga classes are 1.5 hours long. They usually finish with a 10 minute relaxation-meditation session at the end. This part is good in many ways and makes you come out feeling wonderful.
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Old 03-03-2014, 02:45 PM   #6
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I don't have this problem so much because I've become much more active. I'm still waaaay overweight, but all I can think of is 'wow, now I can run for the bus!' Or climb stairs, keep up with my kids, whatever... And I'm a lot less jiggly from lifting dumbbells.
Also, I spent about 15 years fat but not dieting, learning to accept my body- this might be why I see it kind of clearly now?

I might have a different answer in another year when I'm closer to 'normal,' though...
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Old 03-03-2014, 08:56 PM   #7
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I think getting fitter will help too. Then it becomes all about what your body can do.

I'm the opposite to you all - when I'm chubby after babies I still think of myself as slim and get really surprised when I see photos. When I'm back to normal I feel like "myself" again. I have very little that fits me at this weight so the thought of wearing my normal jeans etc is very motivating.
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Old 03-09-2014, 12:13 PM   #8
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Added some movement. Went out and bought a dress for a party. It was a size 10, which 4 years ago I was a size 24. I could see a hint of collar bone. I was very excited.
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Old 03-09-2014, 04:29 PM   #9
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Fantastic! Have fun!!!
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Old 04-12-2014, 07:34 PM   #10
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And always say "I love you (your name here).
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Old 04-25-2014, 05:14 PM   #11
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I'm here again because I find that talking about my eating problem helps. I'm curious about this web site. I will use it to tell you everything I need. If you want me to go to another place, I will. I don't want to frustrate anyone. Love ya!
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Old 04-25-2014, 11:25 PM   #12
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Hello. Martha L here again. I have to share my thoughts right now. I am still in the dark about this website but I am doing what I need to do. I want to eat more almond cookies! I'm okay now.
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Old 04-26-2014, 12:39 AM   #13
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A weight battle is a hard one but keep focused and use this site for support.
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Old 05-02-2014, 11:39 PM   #14
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I'm still expecting my behind to knock stuff off the table or counter, but am slowly getting used to being able to squeeze through smaller spaces and curl up in a chair.

Not to scare you, but sometimes now I look at photos and say who's that old lady, I don't look like that

the trouble with photos is they can lie just like statistics. There's so much that can be from the angle, the lighting, etc.

I'm a size 10, too Abbi and close to your height, a little heavier, of course we're all built differently, I've been working on fitness goals such as c25k, 12 week exercise program, etc, it's really helped with feeling better, healthier and stronger.

I just finally bought a belt today because I see myself in the windows at work and realize I need to tuck my shirt in, not hide under it...

Wishing you the best
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Old 05-03-2014, 08:51 AM   #15
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Not to scare you, but sometimes now I look at photos and say who's that old lady, I don't look like that
Me too, gah!
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