This drives me nuts! I was at the laundromat tonight & this woman started up a conversation with me. We talked for about 20 minutes and in that time she mentioned to me numerous times about how small she is & has always been. How she would never pick up hitchhikers because she was just a little girl & couldn't defend herself (um.. even if you are a big girl you shouldn't be picking up hitchhikers). We were not even talking about weight so why she kept working her tiny frame into the conversation I have no clue. Yes, lady I can see that you weigh less than 120 lbs. You don't have to keep pointing that out to me & making me feel like amazon woman. I know I have a good 80 lbs on you. That's my rant for the day. LOL! I just don't know why some small frame girls have to keep reminding us how small they are. We have eyes ladies! LOL! I also have a friend who does this a lot too. OK. I feel better now that I got that out!
These people are so insecure. They have to bring this up every time they can because they need attention. I wonder if they realize how silly they sound!
These people are so insecure. They have to bring this up every time they can because they need attention. I wonder if they realize how silly they sound!
I agree with you. That must be why they do it. I wish they knew how silly they sound too. LOL!
It has always bugged me (even back in the olden days when I was young and thinner) when skinny chix start saying things like "oooh, I'm so faaat, lookit mee!" when they are clearly just fishing for attention.
When someone who could wear one of my pant legs as a DRESS whines to me about being fat? *GRRR*
I have a friend who has always been very tiny and thin... and I HATE when she mentions something about weight gain or anything! One time she said to me "Oh my gosh, one day I noticed some cottage cheese on my thighs so I went out for a 5 mile bike ride!!"
She actually said the other day that her doctor told her that she is TOO thin.
Things like that just drive me crazy!! I wonder what she thinks when she sees me... man!
I have a friend who has always been very tiny and thin... and I HATE when she mentions something about weight gain or anything! One time she said to me "Oh my gosh, one day I noticed some cottage cheese on my thighs so I went out for a 5 mile bike ride!!"
She actually said the other day that her doctor told her that she is TOO thin.
Things like that just drive me crazy!! I wonder what she thinks when she sees me... man!
she probably doesnt think anything at all when she sees you...people like that are way WAYYY too focused on themselves and their own insecurities
It has always bugged me (even back in the olden days when I was young and thinner) when skinny chix start saying things like "oooh, I'm so faaat, lookit mee!" when they are clearly just fishing for attention.
When someone who could wear one of my pant legs as a DRESS whines to me about being fat? *GRRR*
That's when I agree with them and mention that they look a bit chunky in the waist too. lol
I have a slightly different perspective on this. I get told a lot by various people that 'I'm so tiny'...I hate it! Why? It makes me sound like a delicate little porcelain doll or something like that. I know I'm smaller in build, no need to constantly point it out.
Case in point: My son's best friend's mother is a bigger woman compared to me. One of the first things out of her mouth when we initially met was: "OMG, I can't believe how tiny you are. I don't know if I can be seen with you." SERIOUSLY?!? I was so floored that I just stayed silent. Then whenever she sees me, she always makes it a point to tell me she's on some new diet, how she's striving to lose weight and about how she wasn't always overweight. Half the time I walk away scratching my head because my weight is all she seems to focus on and it appears that my being smaller than her makes her very um, insecure about how she looks. I've never once brought up my size and when she does I promptly change or redirect the subject. My son is very friendly with her son so I keep quiet most of the time but her issue with my weight makes me extremely uncomfortable. And for the record, I'm 5'6" and 117 lbs. There are people who are way smaller than me, lol.
I guess it goes both ways. It stinks that we live in a society where appearance is such an issue. There are far bigger things to focus on in life IMO. Hope I didn't derail the thread with my response.
Her self-image is highly dependent on being viewed as "petite and finely made." Which she views as a good thing.
Maybe she had a mother who pushed petite as being more dainty and desirably feminine.
Maybe she had a boyfriend or husband who fetishized how small she was because it made him feel bigger & more masculine, and he really needed that assurance a lot of the time.
Heck, a lot of our culture thinks that way, too. It's why people collect miniature items, why dogs are often available in miniature breeds, why "small and cute" seem to go together sometimes, and why babies & children have some inherent fascination because they show us human features seemingly shrunken down.
But the connotations aren't always that great. There's the whole childlike thing, for one. For an adult woman, that identification can be, ah, shall we say, a bit disturbing & problematic? Not only for the sexual connotations, but also for the weakness and lack of autonomy & power in the larger world.
It's good to have an accurate view of your body. (A lot of us struggle with that before & after our weight loss.)
But if your identity mostly depends on your being "tiny," and always seeking assurance that you are indeed tiny, yeah, it is a bit sad. And it does seem "off," like the woman really should not assign so much importance to it.
Like maybe she'd get further by thinking of herself as strong, or resourceful, or empathetic, or full of life experience. Or something other than purely packaging.
I hate it when people bring up their size, my size, the size of someone we both know ... I just change the subject.
I agree! It bothers me how other peoples' and my own weight/waistline/clothing size has become an acceptable and normal topic of conversation. I don't even like it when they start talking about celebrities or people so far removed from my own life that they don't affect me!
I just don't bring up weight at all anymore. When I was 225 and clearly overweight, I still couldn't say anything about my weight loss goals to one friend because she was 300+ and she still treated me like that annoying skinny chick that should just shut up. Weight is a sensitive issue for a lot of people.
Last edited by EagleRiverDee; 08-11-2011 at 03:45 PM.
My dearest friend is 4'11" and she mentions her small size a lot because she really hates being so tiny. Being shorter than average can be a real issue for her - the usual stuff of reaching things on shelves that are perfectly reasonable for normal height people but other stuff, too. Example - she was car shopping and she has to specially look for a car she could see over the hood. At 5'7" that is something I had never even considered as an issue. She talks about it because it's a big deal to her.
I don't let these things get to me and I definitely don't judge anyone by it.
I do agree that it's definitely insecurities...but it's NO DIFFERENT than when big girls constantly ask if the jeans make their butt look fat, or when girls constantly say how hot/pretty/cute they are how ugly they are. They're: 1.) fishing for attention 2.) need affirmation constantly and 3.) obsess over what other people think about their image.
Women of all shapes and sizes have this problem...they just ask and talk in a slightly different context.
Some people constantly state the obvious (i.e. "I'm so fat" "I'm so tiny") because they might have always been picked on as a kid for being that certain way. They've learned to cope with that by making fun of themselves. By them stating that they are fat/skinny/4-eyes/etc., they alleviate the situation from becoming hurtful when others may start joking about it.
Women who constantly mention how tiny they are :(
