[Porthardygurl]

Im a recovering binger and i have done so well this past month and a half, but right now, i really want to eat everything..on plan or off plan.. i dont care.. I feel so frustrated and upset and mad and i hate life right now. Dont get me wrong, i love life most of the time...and i have been quite happy..but lately things have been getting to me...like the fact, that i really just want to quit this diet program i am on because i feel like im getting no where.. i mean.. i am getting somewhere but it FEELS like im getting no where.. i want people to notice me when i am walking around are tiny town and be able to say "hey, there goes the girl who has lost some weight" but instead i tell people ive lost 17 pounds and people look at me like im lying cause they cant see it..PLUS..im frustrated because ive been wanting to buy a treadmill and we have been waiting for a Sears card to come in so we can buy it with the sears visa so then we can pay it off monthly and we have been waiting for my fiancees credit check..but its been more than 14 days since we have gotten anything in the mail and im getting impatient,almost to the point of tears. See, i feel like having a treadmill will help me succeed much more..We only have a tiny little gym and the only time i can go is in the evening and well, i have a hard enough time being out in public cause of my feelings of being self-concious about what others think..plus its kinda creepy walking around town at night in the dark by yourself..My fiancee cant take me because my daughter is in bed at 7 which is when i go to the gym.. So..this treadmill would mean i could work out during the day at home when my daughter is down for her nap..ive had success losing weight by running on a treadmill and eating properly..so it feels like success is there but not within my reach.. Im so frustrated and on top of it..my fiancee is freaking out about finances and about how we will get this treadmill but then we will end up having this loan forever cause it will take forever to pay off..and im so mad because i want to just get a job and work my butt off for a month at a job in the evenings but i cant, because my fiancee works in the evenings too and his schedule is so sporadic, that we couldnt get a babysitter in time or on a schedule..which would cost money anyways..So i dont know if im more mad at myself because we had a baby before i got healthy..or the fact that i feel powerless about my circumstances.. But all these emotions are making me want to just give up and eat and eat and eat.. Im trying so hard right now..

[jojotheyoyo]

Hi! Sorry to hear how hard it is. I remember awful times like that when my kids were little and I couldn't seem to get a minute or a penny to help myself. I just wanted to say: you have enough on your "plate," without being concerned about what other people might think. I counsel people and can tell you from experience. Everybody is all wrapped up in worry about themselves and their own problems; they scarcely notice what's up with anyone else.

Just for a little while, try to avoid anyone who is making negative comments. And...Lucky you! You have a fiancee who cares about you and your welfare. I am sending you a lot of love and will be watching for your success.

Originally Posted by Porthardygurl

Im a recovering binger and i have done so well this past month and a half, but right now, i really want to eat everything..on plan or off plan.. i dont care.. I feel so frustrated and upset and mad and i hate life right now. Dont get me wrong, i love life most of the time...and i have been quite happy..but lately things have been getting to me...like the fact, that i really just want to quit this diet program i am on because i feel like im getting no where.. i mean.. i am getting somewhere but it FEELS like im getting no where.. i want people to notice me when i am walking around are tiny town and be able to say "hey, there goes the girl who has lost some weight" but instead i tell people ive lost 17 pounds and people look at me like im lying cause they cant see it..PLUS..im frustrated because ive been wanting to buy a treadmill and we have been waiting for a Sears card to come in so we can buy it with the sears visa so then we can pay it off monthly and we have been waiting for my fiancees credit check..but its been more than 14 days since we have gotten anything in the mail and im getting impatient,almost to the point of tears. See, i feel like having a treadmill will help me succeed much more..We only have a tiny little gym and the only time i can go is in the evening and well, i have a hard enough time being out in public cause of my feelings of being self-concious about what others think..plus its kinda creepy walking around town at night in the dark by yourself..My fiancee cant take me because my daughter is in bed at 7 which is when i go to the gym.. So..this treadmill would mean i could work out during the day at home when my daughter is down for her nap..ive had success losing weight by running on a treadmill and eating properly..so it feels like success is there but not within my reach.. Im so frustrated and on top of it..my fiancee is freaking out about finances and about how we will get this treadmill but then we will end up having this loan forever cause it will take forever to pay off..and im so mad because i want to just get a job and work my butt off for a month at a job in the evenings but i cant, because my fiancee works in the evenings too and his schedule is so sporadic, that we couldnt get a babysitter in time or on a schedule..which would cost money anyways..So i dont know if im more mad at myself because we had a baby before i got healthy..or the fact that i feel powerless about my circumstances.. But all these emotions are making me want to just give up and eat and eat and eat.. Im trying so hard right now..

[odonnela]

Whoah whoah - first of all breathe. Just take a minute, everything will be ok. I am more of an "overeater" than a "binger" but getting upset will make me eat so I know somewhat the boat you are in right now. A couple of things I noticed - you seem like you are pinning all your hopes on this treadmill. Which will get you more into debt. Which will get you more stressed. Why a treadmill? Why not put your baby in a stroller and go for a walk during the day? Why not pop in a exercise DVD? There is a lot of things you can do. Have you ever bought exercise equipment before? I have - a couple times. And I no longer own it because its great for the first month, 2 months or so and then it gets routine and you don't use it. I encourage you to really think about purchasing a treadmill. Not having one is not the reason you are not successful right now. There is something stopping you and only you can figure out what it is but it is not the lack of owning a treadmill. I sound like a great one to be giving advice seeing as I have fallen miserably off my plan - but you sounded like you really needed some kind words.

[Porthardygurl]

I dont go outside for walks because where i live, it literally rains almost every single day..we get double the rain that everywhere else on the island gets..which makes it miserable to get outside and walk..we are lucky if we have one sunny day a week..which is why its so hard to walk..i guess the only reason why i pin need for a treadmill so high on the priority list is because i know that i have had past success with it..i used to be a gym rat when i lived down the island. i used to walk 45 minutes to a gym just to use one for an hour and then walk 45 minutes home..im so frustrated with my results..i mean..im on south beach and trying so hard..but it feels like i will never lose enough weight to get out of these stupid pregnancy clothes..i havent gone shopping in over a year because im still waiting to try and lose weight so i can get out of them..but it feels like i will be stuck in my sweatpants for life...i guess i find it easier to run instead of doing dvd videos..and i dont have weights in my house to use..i dont know why..there is something about running that makes me feel better and in control and happier..i dont get the same feeling from doing dvds or other exercise..