[spixiet]

Kaplods - I'm sending a very major thank you your way for all the posts you've made about not considering slow weight loss as failure! The past few days, I've been feeling more and more stressed about being on this side of the new year, and thinking about goals I set for myself early on (including a weight-related goal with a specific date in mind)... The stress comes in the form of feeling like I'm losing weight too slowly, which leads to feeling like I'm failing. I swear, while I was walking today, I was channeling your words of wisdom...things like, "If you lose a pound and keep it off, you're more successful than the majority of dieters," or "Maintaining weight loss is a success in itself." (okay, I don't know if those are exactly your words, but it's pretty close )

Especially at this point in the year, I'm feeling pressure not only from myself, but from the world at large, that I need to be dropping major amounts of weight, or I'm a failure. Shows like "The Biggest Loser" just starting up, or some of the other weight loss shows featuring people having double digits drops in a single week or losing nearly a pound a day for an extended period of time, add to that feeling. In addition, three of my co-workers are very publicly starting the South Beach Diet, so I'm guessing we'll all be hearing about their losses during phase 1.

And so, kaplods, I think of some of your posts, and I remind myself not to judge my weight loss journey based on the successes and failures of others. I will continue down my path and ignore the nagging feeling of failure that is creeping up at this weight-loss-focused time of year. I'm also realizing that setting a specific date that I'd like to be at a midway goal may not be a good motivation for me if it only makes me want to give up. (I do realize that having specific dates in mind does help some people stay focused)

For those of you who are just starting with the new year, possibly dreaming of fast weight loss, I truly do hope you will be successful in reaching your goals. However, if you find yourself feeling like giving up because you're only losing half a pound a week or so, you might want to search through this site for some of the fantastic posts by kaplods or other "slow buy steady" style losers before deciding to return to your old habits.

[GradPhase]

Absolutely. Kaplods has given some of the best advice I've ever gotten, time and time again! <3 !

[pamatga]

I have read her pearls of wisdom time and again. I couldn't have said it better.

[luckymommy]

I always read the posts of Kaplods with great interest. She is full of incredible wisdom and is such an inspiration. I am so glad she is part of our community.

[gagirl1]

Thank you for posting this. As someone who is just starting (again) and someone new to this site, it is wonderful to see such a great example of the support given and received here. Thanks again!

[goal4agirl]

Yes I totally agree! Thank you for posting this spixiet... I am one of those slow losers. But after reading several of kaplods posts I realized that all is not lost- I'm still heading in the right direction.
Thank you kaplods for adding so much to this community and for motivating me when I am feeling low. Thank you spixiet...I was feeling kinda low today I am in a stall right now .

[PinkHoodie]

This has been having a HUGE effect on me lately too after our chat on the PCOS support board. She really opened up my eyes to a lot of things in her posts. She is a very important part of this community!!!

[Arctic Mama]

Time related goals are death for me. Getting in the mindset of only losing ____ pounds, instead of being thrilled for every pound gone, damages so many women and men in their weight loss attempts.

Kaplods, I heartily agree, your thoughtful and intelligent contributions to this community have been a real blessing to me, I am very grateful to be on this journey slowly but surely down the scale with a woman like you (and the dozens of other amazing chicks around here!).

[Nola Celeste]

She's why I joined this site--and a major reason why I'm still here, still losing, still involved. It's rare to find one person who can so perfectly sum up what others need to hear, yet do it with tact and sensitivity.

Spixiet, I'm glad you posted this; I've been wanting to say thanks, but you were so eloquent in describing how meaningful that message is that all I could really add is "me too!"

[time2lose]

I agree! I think often of Kaplod's statement (my paraphrase) "People often give up, not because they are failing, but because they aren't succeeding fast enough."

I would rather have fast weight loss, but I am succeeding even if I am losing weight slowly.

[Tinky]

Sounds like I need to look up this lady's posts.

I want to lose a lot of weight, and relatively fast, because I'm sick of it. I want to be healthy and feel light and feel it now! I'm impatient, and an "all or nothing" type. (Right now, I'm in nothing mode, trying to work my way into a "plan").

I need to learn how to strike a balance.

[goodforme]

I agree with everyone above, I love Kaplods and her thoughtful, meaningful posts. I ponder tweaking my plan into oblivion, murderously cutting my calories, in order to get "where I'm going" faster, only to remind myself time and time again, that the journey is just as important as the destination.

I'm probably the slowest loser around, but I'm okay with that, because as long as the scale keeps steady, the clothes I started out in stay too big, and the habits get reinforced, I'm good!

[twinmommaplusone]

Awe, thats sweet.

Agreed, I think anyone that has gone through a large portion of the journey can appreciate/value that wisdom, that we want it all to happen so quickly and we have to keep our mind on the idea that our changes and momentum are life changing so it's almost irrelevant how long it lasts.

[kaplods]

WOW, You all have no idea what your words mean to me (or how much I needed to hear my own words quoted back to me).

Every year (even though I know better), I go through the "resolution blues."

I gained a little over Christmas vacation with my family. There was also a lot of family drama that I got sucked into. Some really stressful situations, but also artificially created drama to distract themselves from the stressful situations.

Getting home, I've gotten off most of the holiday gain (I'm only two pounds from my ticker weight), but I was feeling a little down that I hadn't lost more weight in 2010.

Tuesday night at my TOPS group, I was one of the few members who didn't gain weight this week (I lost 1.75 lb). I was happy, but was still feeling a bit down about not having done as well as I would have liked.

The thing I hate about weight loss the most, is having feelings that are completely incompatible with my beliefs.

I KNOW that I'm not failing, but I often FEEL that I am. Why do my emotions betray me?

Everyone in this thread (heck, on this whole website) does such a great job of pushing my feelings towards my beliefs.

Without all of you, I know I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't even be listening to my own advice, because it's the support I get here that keeps me rational. Without you all, I'd be letting my emotions overshadow rational thought (and whenever that happens, it always seems to be the negative emotions in control).

[annah788]

I am new to the site and haven't seen any of Kaplods's posts, but I agree with what you are saying. I think any loss is a success, not matter how big or small. Thanks for sharing!