Started eating hunks of bread by 10 am. Ended up eating at least 500 calories of only bread. And then, at dinner, as though it wasn't enough that I had eaten all this extra bread, I actually ate about half a cup of pasta, one of my ABSOLUTE NO UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES food. Now, I've had some trouble staying on plan lately, but I've never turned to my old comfort food-- carbs-- before. Even when I was eating too many almonds, it was a moderately controlled situation, because normally I'm only triggered by carbs.
I felt HORRIBLE. Headache, exhausted, cranky, stressed. Just awful. Got into a huge argument with DH...but I didn't put two and two together.
Woke up this morning realizing that my body was probably reeling from the shock of all the bread!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have GOT to reconfigure my plan in a way that works for me. At least I woke up this morning with no desire to eat carbs whatsoever!!!!!!!!!!!
The good news is that I'm still having more good days than bad, and that I have reestablished my exercise routine. The bad news is that clearly overall I'm eating too many calories to lose, and that is making me lose sight of where I'm going.
Holding onto positive change through upheaval and stress is HARD. But I have to believe I can do it.
Holding onto positive change through upheaval and stress is HARD. But I have to believe I can do it.
Sorry you are struggling. First off - please forgive yourself.
What you said about change is so, so true. I totally understand. It's when you must pull out all of your resources that have worked in the past and maybe some new ones.
I've been very stressed lately too. It's been helping me to listen to some relaxation CD's (I have them for weight loss too) and I find them very helpfpul. Get into a comfy chair etc., put the earphones on and do some listening and ultimately relaxing and feeling better. It sounds hokey...but, it is worth it.
Hop right back on your plan. Plan, plan and plan some more. You CAN get through this.
Last edited by Beverlyjoy; 11-07-2010 at 08:13 AM.
i know all about losing control, lost and gained 160lbs! it is an awful horrible thing to go through. this time i am going to try and remember just how crappy i feel when i eat off plan. it is night and day how much better i feel when i am eating healthy.
i believe in you. don't beat yourself up over this. maybe think about what triggered it, and move on. look at it as just another life lesson
The best thing about dieting is that you can start over at anytime. I am sure many of us have experienced what you are going through. I know I have. You have had a fabulous loss ! Congratulations on that . I believe that you can turn this around.
I am on plan 98% of the time. But life happens. Days are stressful, birthdays, holidays, work parties, wedding tastings (that was me yesterday), family dinners. It all happens. It is ok. As long as you recognize it and stop it at that one event. The problem is not the occasional over indulgence, the problem is the continued over indulgence.
It is OK to have "slip ups" or "cheats" or whatever you want to call them. Just do not let it slide you down all the way. If you have one bad meal, ok fine, its one meal of one day of the rest of your life. Do not beat yourself up about it, that will start the spiral! Smile and move on you have come WAY to far to let a bad day kill it
If I'm being totally honest here, I could happily eat nothing but Italian bread and pasta every day until I died. I enjoy them so much more than a chicken breast.
I live and work in the land of artisanal breads. Fresh baked baguettes and Italian loaves surround me. Not to mention bagels. I'm a big breadie, and learning to switch to 45 calorie/slice wheat bread was not easy, and took me time. I actually can't have nuts around, because I can't stop eating them.
those kinds of foods can be pretty addictive. don't be too hard on yourself, you discovered something.
major congrats on getting the exercise routine back in place. I actually believe that will go a long way in helping you get your eating routine back to where you want it. Be proud, you've accomplished a tremendous amount and have been very successful in your weight loss and health efforts.
Uber sounds like you've run into a little bump in the road here. I know the feeling as I'm on bumpy ground myself right now.
I don't have any words of wisdom, as you are one of the wisest ones here. You've recognized your problem and you know what to do about it - and you will just have to do it.
You and me both.
The comfort of being on plan is waaaay better than the discomfort of being off. One hour at a time.
Hugs to you. You CAN do this. And you will. I am certain of it.
I'm still wondering what the "hunks of bread" were doing in your house, and why you started eating them. Did you think you could stop with 1 hunk? If so, then hopefully you now know that you can't start with bread first thing in the morning.
I'd suggest you go back to basics and make a goal to stick to your program for 2 weeks. Yes, every day of those 2 weeks. It sounds like you're not clear on what you're doing, and having to think about specifics would probably help.
I love bread too! Bad days happen, and at least you realized how gross you felt the next day because of it. Maybe you won't do it again because of how you felt afterwards. We all have bad days, and just get back on plan today. Maybe your body was missing carbs?
The comfort of being on plan is waaaay better than the discomfort of being off. One hour at a time.
Oh Robin-- thank you!!! Talk about the right words at the right time!!
I'm just so utterly stressed out right now on so many levels, and I'm learning about myself. I cope with stress by wanting to eat.
It's amazing that I'm hanging on at all given my binge-tastic history, but every time I kick myself back into the groove I feel SO MUCH better.
I'm sorry that you are going through a rough time, too. I keep thinking about you and Matt and some of the other big loser/maintainers, and how you said that sometimes losing the grip and then finding it again is part of the process.... obviously, after a year of coasting down the down slope and thinking it was "easy" I'm hitting up against the fact that I have a 30 year history of food issues. I can beat it, but it was not reasonable to expect that it would always be easy.
The old familiar way of dealing with stress is JUST NOT an option for me.... I have a new normal, and it actually relieves stress MUCH better than the old way.
Jay Ell-- I guess the other thing I'm learning about myself is that when I'm under stress and and having trouble I have to watch out with foods that I'm normally ok with. My husband bakes a loaf of bread every single day in the bread machine. I have one slice. I've never gone off and eaten more than that. I've been doing that for over a year. Same thing with almonds. I kept them in my house and never looked at them, then last week I had to ban them.
Today, while not perfect was MUCH better and I'm heading to the gym right now.
I'm glad this day was better. I echo the posts already here: deeply impressed at what you've achieved; deeply sympathetic at the headstuff that's now free to bubble up (terrifying!); Don't give yourself a huge weight of guilt, just look at this as a natural part of your process, which it is.
Don't let it slide, though, don't think that as you've drifted off plan, you'll drift back on again: most of our histories showthat to be untrue (I speak as one who lost 106, within 16 of goal, ludicrously happy with my life, had one gloomy day, thought I'd get it back, regained 89lbs). If it were me, and like I say, just 5 months ago it was, I'd plan to begin a Diet/WoE as though it were the very first day. Plan a budget of calories or carbs or whatever you do, and obsess about it hour by hour, just as though you were a total newby at it. See if, after a couple of days of that kind of obsession, your mindset will shift back into the right mode.
Awful day, and some insights...
