So many of us have been exactly where you are - so many times.
Good. I'm glad you've recognized this and are ready to put a halt to it.
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Getting on the scale this morning was the first step lets see if I can take the next successfully.
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Well of course you CAN. It IS up to you. You have the power over this.It is your choice. You are in control So let's not see if you can take the next step, but MAKE SURE you take the next step. Set the wheels in motion. Decide to do this, once and for all, permanently and NO MATTER WHAT. NO MATTER WHAT.
There is no joy to be had in overeating, we can hear that in your post and we can all attest to it as well. No one ever comes on here and says how wonderful it is to overfeed oneself and gain weight. But we always hear just the opposite when we are eating right, losing weight and FEELING MARVELOUS. So please don't dread these changes that you are about to remake. Look forward to them.
I for one won't wish you luck. Why?
Because luck has nothing to do with it. It can't help you. It's not a gamble. It's not like playing the lottery where you just wait around for it to happen - thankfully. You have to MAKE IT HAPPEN. Imagine if losing weight and being healthy WAS determined by luck? Eww. G-d forbid.
No, luck won't do it. Hard work will. Determination, perseverance, good planning, mature, responsible behaviors and so on. All things that you have the power over. So, it's up to you. Yay! No relying on luck - just your commitment and hard work.
I look forward to hearing that you are taking the next steps, of being back in the groove, back to the good habits, back to where you belong. Plan the heck out of your days, stay strong those first few days as you wean yourself off of and out of the *bad* habits and the good habits take hold and we WILL be hearing of your progress.