[2phatinvictoria]

Im Still really upset about this, and just need to get some insight from you ladies, because I value what you all have to say.

So this new guy got posted to my bf's Ship (navy). He Instantly became friends with my bf and his best friend. So he invited my bf, his besty and I too his birthday dinner. We go.. and you know when you just get this feeling where you just dont like someone.. but you dont know why.. Well I got that feeling hard core. I of course was polite and made conversations with this guy and his (horrid ) wife. They asked what I did for work, and I was honest Im in between jobs at the moment and just waiting to save up more money to go back to school in sept. YOU should have seen the stink face they gave me. I wanted to lunge across the table and beat the look off her face.
The next day when the bf was at work, that new guy goes up to my bf and says.. "you know if you want i could hook you up with a girl whos university educated and who can actually pay for stuff..." my bf of course freaked out. WTF who the **** says that.. Im college educated.. does that no count for something .. also im just 21 years old.. I DIDNT KNOW I HAD TO HAVE everything together to be a "real" girlfriend. GAWD..
Oh and it gets better....

Then my bf was talking about how we went grocery shopping the other night and bought a bunch of cheeses (every now and again we do a cheese and sparkling apple juice night we both dont drink) and then that stupid guy says.. "let me guess you paid for it all... I think that girl is just taking you for a ride man" my bf just walked away from him.

ONE.... NO he didnt pay for it all.. I still have money so that I can pay for my half of stuff.. Ive met this guy twice and he thinks im going to just use my bf... Im going to marry this guy for crying out loud.. im not with him for money. what little we have...

two.. WTF

three.. Am i over reacting..? Ive told my bf.. I will not control what comes out of my mouth the next time i have to see this dbag (excuse the words) and that guy is NOT allowed in our house.. Nope.. F that..

Im still really upset about this. I cant believe there are people in the world like this. It makes me feel like im not good enough for my bf, even though ive done nothing wrong. I hope that guy trips and falls down or something.. gawd..

ok rant over.. sorry about that just had to vent...

[Rosinante]

I have a problem with "dbag" - it's not strong enough! What a ..... well, I don't see other people swear on 3fc so I won't. Loser. F-wit. Idiot. I hope your bf sees as little of him as possible.

[pamatga]

What he said was out of line and ignorant. IMO I would talk to my bf and tell him that if he chooses to be friends with this person you would respect his choice but that you would prefer not to be social with this person or his gf and then tell him why. You can only change yourself and no one else. That is simply the way life works. You have nothing to be ashamed of. There is no shame in being either unemployed or even if you didn't pay for the food. So what? I don't like judgmental people in my life. If they sometimes happen to brush into my "inner circle" I make the best of it but I certainly understand your strong feelings. I doubt whether this person would feel much different if the tables were turned on him and his gf.

There are 8 million unemployed people in the U.S. right now. It would be insulting to any one of them if they were treated this way. There are many many college graduates, including myself, who lost their jobs because of businesses who had to cut payroll so they could still make a profit in this increasingly competitive global market we are in. I have one person say to me that I could work if I wanted to. I was offended but I just smiled and said nothing. Ignorant people are well ignorant. I wasn't going to waste my energy on trying to educate an a**.

Never never allow someone else to make you feel inferior. Only people who aren't feeling really good about themselves will try that. I have lived a lot longer than you and I can tell you that time has proven me correct on this.

Love Pam

[dragonwoman64]

ok, kuckoo, kuckoo... ha. no, you're not overreacting. they are on another planet. don't be upset, just block those two from your consciousness.

[MaddiesMom]

I don't blame you for ranting! That guys seems to be a total a*****e!!! In this economy, it's not uncommon for people to be unemployed - he's making assumptions that he shouldn't be making. I dont' know who this guy thinks he is!!! Did his wife ever mentioned what she does?

Sorry you had to go through that. Some people lack any and all common sense.

[ThicknPretty]

WTH?

I know they are friends, but why does he care THAT much? I have opinions about my friends partners, but they aren't THAT strong and I would never express them so rudely! Sounds like he's one of those "friends" who has no boundaries and wants to control as many aspects of their friends lives as possible. Like, if he hooked your BF up with someone else, he would be the type to constantly bring that up and would feel like he was entitled to invade upon that relationship, too.

I wouldn't want my BF to even associate with such an a-word-hole-face, but I know ultimately you have to respect his decision...ugh though!

No, NOT overreacting! Under reacting compared to what I would have done...

[Rhythm]

If that happened to me, I'd ask my boyfriend not to mention it ever again and push it to the back of my mind. He's a little worm who shouldn't be significant enough to screw with your emotions. It's almost kind of sad how much effort he's putting into splitting you two up, since he's never going to make it happen. He's not nearly important enough to make any impact. :P Loser.

[LLH2010]

You reacted just fine. I wouldn't want anyone like that to be in my life, my husbands, or our home. What an idiotic jerk!

[bargoo]

Not only is this guy rude and ignorant, but he is a busybody as well ! Not attractive traits in a person. I would see him as little as I possibly could and I hope your bf does the same.

[westernsoutherngirl]

You did not over-react and you should tell your BF to tell this jerk that he doesn't need any advice from him thank you very much! People like that are parasites! Next thing you know he will be playing your BF and his bestie off each other and trying to make trouble there!

[duckyyellowfeet]

jerk. seriously. As if its any of his business what goes on with your fiances. Really, I don't think you reacted harsh enough; after two comments, I would have let him have it.

Stop seeing this guy. Your boyfriend can see him on ship and you can just forget about him

[Coondocks]

You have a lot more patience than I do I can tell you that. Not that i would have gone an a verbally tirade out in public, but i wouldn't have sat threw dinner either . . . . knowing the way my mouth works. I would have nicely excused myself and let BF know I would see him at home, have a good night but out of respect for him - the best way for me to be polite is to leave.

Seriously . . . Dbag doesnt cover it . . . . ignorant s**t is a little closer

[Shmead]

Honestly, I don't think your bf should even have involved you. He should have said something rude and cutting to the guy, cut off the friendship after that (being civil as needed to do their job, but nothing personal or friendly, ever) and he never should have mentioned it to you-if you asked after the guy, he should have just said "he's a total *******. I don't hang out with him any more".

Maybe it's just me, but I'd tell my partner not to repeat comments like that to you. They are nothing but hurtful, and they aren't based on fact--it's not like some sort of tough love that you needed to hear, or anything like that.

[Windchime]

Originally Posted by Shmead

Maybe it's just me, but I'd tell my partner not to repeat comments like that to you. They are nothing but hurtful, and they aren't based on fact--it's not like some sort of tough love that you needed to hear, or anything like that.

I agree. Yes, the guy does sound like a jerk, and hopefully your boyfriend won't ask you to socialize with these people again. But I'm wondering why your boyfriend found it necessary to repeat those hurtful comments to you.......