where did my motivation go? - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

2phatinvictoria · 07-08-2010, 11:33 AM

Bleh.. Ive been putting off this post for weeks because i kept thinking.. oh you know im just in a funk ill get out of it..

But its been weeks upon weeks and i just cant seem to get out of it.

Im super stressed out with still looking for work, My BF leaves to go to sea in 12 days for 4 months, spring cleaning (im tired of a cluttered house and mis match everything, so we got a new living room set (a really great price!! thank god for the canex), and a new bed (because I have been having soo much trouble falling asleep and our current bed has started to sag and we roll into each other...)

I really keep trying to get to the gym but i just dont. I have been eating healthy, but not as healthy as i was.

I also have this idea in my head that i need to just maintain until i get all the stuff with my house done and wait for my bf to go... then i can focus on me.

Im beating my self up pretty bad and was just wondering.. do other people go through this too and how the heck did you get through it..

I just feel... Lost.

thanks

ablentlinger · 07-08-2010, 11:46 AM

We have all been in this situation. I know for my that what you are going through now led to me never getting "back in the groove." I would start out great and then something would happen and I would very slowly lose my motivation and go right back to my old habits. You have to put all the reasons aside and start living for you TODAY. Don't wait for the BF to leave. Remember how you felt when you started? What made you feel motivated then? Sometimes I visit the mini-goal and goal threads on 3FC to remind myself that I want to be there someday. Or looking at current photos of myself usually gets me re-motivated to get back on track. You CAN do this!!! Think how HOT you will look in 4 months when your BF comes back!

ChrissyBean · 07-09-2010, 04:49 PM

You received some good advice. I'd like to add that I'm a firm believer in "fake it till you make it". Never mind motivation, just go through the motions until your mojo comes back.

Shmead · 07-09-2010, 05:02 PM

For me, when I get like that there is often one little thing that I REALLY, REALLY don't want to do, and somehow the way I avoid that is by avoiding everything: for example, if I have ONE bill I don't want to deal with because I know I will have to call someone and argue with them, I'll let the whole pile of bills go unpaid and end up with a ton of late fees. My illogical brain avoids the whole mess to avoid the thing I am dreading.

Is there something specific you can't stand? Maybe you need a plan that is a little more relaxed/permissive but still will lead to weight loss. It's better to plan to go to the gym for 20 minutes and go than it is to plan to go for an hour and stay home. Every hour you stay on plan--however easy the plan--makes the next hour easier, and after a while you can tighten up the plan.

Athenacapella · 07-09-2010, 07:01 PM

I wish I had an easy answer for you. If I knew what it wasn't, I wouldn't have regained and then some all this weight.

For me, if I can just do SOMETHING even remotely physical, then I remember how much I actually kinda enjoy "exercise." And that it's sucky to carry around 100 extra pounds because I'm so limited.

Can you do something FUN that will get you moving again? Go dancing, hiking in a beautiful setting, walking on a beach with the BF. Something that you want to do that also happens to involve exercise?

doingmybest · 07-12-2010, 12:32 AM

I went through the same thing and what I learned is to just be really kind to yourself and really patient with yourself. Don't beat yourself up - start wherever you are and take baby steps. If you take one small step, you will feel good and this may encourage you to take another step.

Once when I was at a WW meeting, a member couldn't get motivated and told the leader "Maybe I need a kick in the pants" and the leader said "Maybe what you need is support".

I am here to support you. Please keep posting on how you are doing.

duckyyellowfeet · 07-12-2010, 02:23 AM

Your motivation most likely went on a nice long vacation with mine. Hopefully, they are having fun

Just keep plugging on....at least thats what I'm telling myself. Maybe I can't commit 100% right now. But isn't 80% better than just throwing my hands in the air and forgetting about the whole thing? If you can just make one better choice each day, you'll eventually be back into the full swing of everything. Good luck

Fressca · 07-12-2010, 09:42 AM

Hey, 2Phat.

I too go through periods - eons? - where the motivation just isn't there, so I copied what 2 savvy maintainers here on the forum say into my siggy. Sometimes it helps, and sometimes not, but it reminds me that I can't really use flagging motivation as an excuse.

Momto2Ms · 07-12-2010, 10:06 AM

Today is a new day! You have to do this for the rest of your life, and motivation will not always be there, especially in the tough times. Food has likely been a crutch in the past to get you through it, but remember it is not a solution. This is your life now, motivation or not.

Good luck making today a good day!

Lori Bell · 07-12-2010, 11:35 AM

Hi.
I have found, that for me, I had to work very hard every single day at losing the weight. I wanted it gone, and I decided that nothing was more important. I have to work equally as hard to maintain my loss. Every day is a battle. Every single day there is something stressful, something chaotic, something fun, something crazy...etc. I just know that I have to remain in control throughout each and every obstacle in order to stay fit. Every day I blow it (and I have on occasion) makes for even a more stressful day. I don't need stress on top of stress, know what I mean? I think every day when you wake up you just have to decide to eat right and move. For me, that is the only thing that worked. (And prayer) Good luck.

2phatinvictoria · 07-12-2010, 05:45 PM

Thanks for all the input ladies! I really appreciate it. Ive been back on track with my eating, not 100 percent but 80 percent! and its already improving my moods! My House is finally starting to come together and i find that my motivation is coming back. I noticed for me its 20 percent my eating habits and the rest moving my butt! So because of that im going to sign up for a zumba class and see what everyone is talking about!

thanks again

GradPhase · 07-12-2010, 06:25 PM

I once read somewhere on 3FC...

.."Motivation is the thing that leaves you when you need it most.."

There was more to it, but that's the part that stuck with me. It's true. You don't need motivation. What you need is just the blind determination to get you through the bad spots. Hang in there!