I almost lost control today :( - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

JennieLovesKisses · 06-21-2010, 11:19 PM

For the past 3 days now I haven't taken my daily multivitamin/multimineral (gotta buy some more) and honestly have just felt like poop...I didn't realize how much better I feel when I take it! These last three days I've not only had to fight myself to workout because lack of energy but I've been feeling so hungry.

Today after my p90x - yoga I felt like I was starving. I haven't had money for food, so I'm all out of my good healthy snacks I usually eat in between meals so I don't feel like this. I searched through the cabinets looking for something to munch on and there they were...a box of popcorn! I thought to myself "eh, popcorn isn't THAT bad" it had butter, but not that movie theater extra butter type. The label: 180cal for 4 cups. I made the popcorn, and I said to myself I would only have 2 cups worth. I measured out 2 cups and put the extra popcorn away. After practically shoveling every single piece into my mouth I realized this was BAD! I grabbed the bag of popcorn and I literally stood over the garbage can trying to decide if I wanted to eat more or just throw it away. I took a couple out of the bad and then more and more! I ate around 2 more cups worth of popcorn before getting SUPER mad at myself. I ended up going to the fridge to find ANYTHING to toss in with the popcorn to make myself stop eating, mustard did the trick. After completely ruining what was left in the bag I threw it away and ran to the bathroom and brushed my teeth and washed my hands...just to get the taste and small away.

I felt so sick with what I did. It wasn't really the popcorn that bothered me, it was the feeling: I had no control. I have been on this journey for over a year now and have never felt like I was out of control with food before. Even now all I can think about is what I can eat. I keep my calorie intake between 1200-1500, past few days its been up in the 1400 almost 1500. Today, so far Ive eaten 1200...and not even a good 1200. I had a bowl of oatmeal, a bowl of honey nut cereal, 1 rib, a half of a peanut butter sandwich and 4 cups of popcorn. Todays meals are so not normal for me and I don't know whats come over me. I seriously need to kick my butt back into gear and get some healthy food in the house.

I'm at my boyfriend house for the night and I know he's going to be making dinner and I KNOW he's going to offer me some. I'm trying to decide if I should just eat, but in moderation still keeping my 1500calorie limit or if I should stop myself early and accept what I've already taken in today.

Natalia · 06-21-2010, 11:43 PM

Don't beat yourself up over the popcorn. It didn't happen because you're weak; it happened because you were starvin'!!!!! Once we get that hungry it's natural to scavenge and feel out of control. It's primal (lol)

Just make sure you go on a snack run soon bc you're going to need some good healthy things. Also you already pointed it out that this wasn;'t a typical menu, but it was very carby and low protein, and low volume. No wonder you were famished!

Natalia · 06-21-2010, 11:45 PM

And re: the dinner, if you're hungry, EAT. If you're not hungry, don't eat

Even if I'm over what I budget for calories, if I am hungry I definitely eat because for me personally I get out of control if I'm too hungry. SO being over by 100-300 cals is nothing compared to a 1500 calorie binge .. kwim?

kendra · 06-21-2010, 11:53 PM

awwww maybe it's your body telling you that you need a little bit more. It might also be the fact that you don't have your normal food. Popcorn isn't bad for you because of all of the fiber and it was even better because it wasn't loaded with the movie butter. Don't deprive yourself, have a little bit of your boyfriends dinner, then start your day over tomorrow.

You are doing such a good job. You are an inspiration.

JennieLovesKisses · 06-21-2010, 11:59 PM

I'm definitely going shopping tomorrow! Stalking up on my fruits and veggies! AND getting my vitamins.

My Typical Meals for me are -

Breakfast: Oatmeal with a piece of fruit.
Lunch: turkey sandwich w/lettuce, no mayo no cheese. Carrots or side fruit.
Dinner: Pretty random - Hamburger helper, Steak, chicken, Soups/Stews hotdogs...all of which are usually prepared with veggies. Or sometimes a large Salad.
Snacks: wheat thins, fruits, veggies with a low fat dressing, raisins...even a small salad at times.

I don't drink soda, I drink anywhere between 64-96 ounces of water a day.

Seriously haven't had popcorn in a year...I forgot how addicting it was. >.<

Thank you guys for the support!

It was just scary to me. I felt like I just couldn't stop myself!

Marly2983 · 06-22-2010, 12:07 AM

Don't beat yourself up over one bad move. I find that if I dwell on the bad then it makes me feel worse and I eat worse.

lucky8 · 06-22-2010, 02:16 AM

I dont think its the fact your feeling like this is because you havent had your multi vit..........probs because your not eating enough. Your body is feeling drained and weak.

If you havent much food in and not much money then its obvious this is why you feel this way ( ive been there to, ive litterally been to the point is where ive litterally had not a bit of food in apart form some store cupboard ingredients ...flour etc and have resorted to making buscuits ( in a fashion) and scoffing the lot because ive been SO hungary.

That was a long time ago , but i have has times more recent where ive litterally had to have what was there and if it was bad then so be it i was hungary.

Dont beat yaself up , you shoud have ate the whole bag and classed it as ya meal or a one off. Missing out food will only make your body go in2 starvation hence making you feel ILL. Unless your eating large volumes of bad food everyday one bag of popcorn isnt gona do you anyharm ...........will do you more good as will keep hunger at bay and keep you matabolising.

The out of control feeling is natures way of saying FEED ME!!!
Go n get ya self to ya boyfriends n eat his meal enjoy it ........ya body will need all those calories after all the ones you have missed ENJOY X

EveLHaelf · 06-22-2010, 07:47 AM

JMHO, but you may need to be eating more protein as well. Since you are doing some major weightlifting (p90x) your muscles need protein to rebuild themselves after you break them down with exercise. Protein will also help you to feel full longer. From what you've posted, it doesn't look like your body is getting the amount of protein it needs.

And I personally think that you did an excellent job of stopping eating the popcorn. I have yet to accomplish that once I get to a certain point I end up bingeing. Throwing away that popcorn and destroying it with mustard and then brushing your teeth was a very good step. I've actually gotten things back out of the garbage if I'm craving the junk enough (eeeew gross, I know.) So the mustard thing is a great idea.

Like everyone else is saying, don't beat yourself up. You are doing a great job and have come so far!

JennieLovesKisses · 06-22-2010, 02:00 PM

Thanks again everyone!

lucky8 - It's been super hard, I'm 23 and job hunting at the moment...so I barely have any money and usually the money I do get goes to paying off a credit card. >.< I live with my dad right now and I buy my own food usually, but these past few days I seem to have run out of everything and have had to make due with what dad has in the house which isn't much. I just got $20 so I'm gonna head to the store and see how much I can get out of that.

EveLHaelf - I will definitely work on getting more protein in my diet!

Gold32 · 06-22-2010, 04:00 PM

Jennie- I read the comments and only have one thing to add: A very cheap, but still amazing super food that comes packed with protein? Eggs. Seriously, I've heard them described as one of the most perfect foods out there, especially for the amount and "quality" of protein in them, which is apparently better than meats.

Seriously, I don't work for an egg company, I promise. I'm just amazed how full I can feel with one hard boiled egg white. (20 calories!)

JennieLovesKisses · 06-22-2010, 05:23 PM

I was actually going to pick up eggs, and start making egg sandwiches for lunches/dinners. I had one the other day while at my boyfriends and they are super yummy. Usually when I make eggs, I only use egg whites, but I'm going to up my calories a bit and keep the yolks.

sotypical · 06-22-2010, 05:45 PM

Eggs are seriously my new favourtie food.

I used to always buy egg whites because they were less calories. But lately I decided the whole egg is too good and cheap! I just keep a few boiled in my fridge for the week.

BTW - bravo to you for adding the mustard and throwing it away. I would of ate the whole bag!