I think I'm feeling especially fat because when I had lost 37lbs I had my pants taken in. Now they feel really tight like they used to feel back when I was at 215. It's amazing how I can feel like 190 and 215 feel exactly the same when they're not.
"Binging is a descent into a world where every restriction... is cut loose. At its core is a feeling of deprivation.. a feeling you can never get enough. Binges do not signify a lack of willpower or inability to care for yourself. On the contrary, binges are a urgent attempt to care for yourself when you feel uncared for. They are the voice of survival. Binges are the mark of the self that says, 'I am tired of feeling deprived, of being told I am wrong, that I am bad." - Geneen Roth