How do you stay humble? - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

ncuneo · 04-23-2010, 06:45 PM

So most of the time I'm pretty humble about my success and how I look today, but sometimes I'm just down right conceited. I'll be walking through the parking lot and someone will stare at me a second longer than they should and I'll think to myself "Yeah that's right, I look good!" I know this all sounds completely ridiculous, but I'm sure someone can relate even if just a little. How do you keep it from getting away from you, how do you keep it all in perspective?

MyBestYear · 04-23-2010, 07:05 PM

Well I'm not there yet obviously, but I think it is totally okay to celebrate your success! I mean, there is a fine line between cocky and celebratory, but I think that line is located within the mouth HAHAHA. What I mean is, I think it is fine to *think* how great you look and even to thank someone if they compliment you etc, but going on and on about your fabulousness is a bit much lol

For me as a Christian, I give all the glory to God for my success because God knows trying to do it myself has failed me so many times.

If you are not religious, maybe it would help to remind yourself how easily you can be back to where you started to keep you in check?

I think it is fine to celebrate success and feel pleased at how far you have come while also staying humble and in touch with where you came from.

mkendrick · 04-23-2010, 07:06 PM

I'm still mostly stuck in the phase where my brain is still the chubby girl even though I've lost the weight. I truly don't feel like I'm small or thin or anything of the sort. So when people compliment me or the subject of weight/size comes up, I'm always more self-deprecating than I should be. I've noticed that this annoys some of my larger friends who still have a ways to go. Ya know that annoying skinny girl that always says "ugh, no way, I'm sooo fat" when somebody compliments her? I think I'm kind of becoming that girl unintentionally. Those things pop out of my mouth before I can censor them for being insensitive. I'm honestly not trying to fish for compliments, my brain just hasn't caught up with my size.

So, I'm still overly humble and modest, lol.

Meg · 04-23-2010, 07:14 PM

I've been here at 3FC and the world of weight loss to know that most people who lose weight gain it all back. That fact keeps me humble because I know how quickly and easily it could all slip away. No one works hard to reach goal and then intends to put all the weight back on, but that's what happens all too often. Most heavy people I know have lost and regained many, many pounds -- for me personally, it's in the hundreds of pounds. I'm humble and profoundly grateful that I've kept the weight off for all these years, but know that there are no guarantees that I can keep it off forever. Just hard work and commitment, for the rest of my life.

ncuneo · 04-23-2010, 07:22 PM

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I've been here at 3FC and the world of weight loss to know that most people who lose weight gain it all back. That fact keeps me humble because I know how quickly and easily it could all slip away.

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If you are not religious, maybe it would help to remind yourself how easily you can be back to where you started to keep you in check?

Ah ha! Perfect! This little reminder will do it for me everytime.

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I'm still mostly stuck in the phase where my brain is still the chubby girl even though I've lost the weight.

I'm here most of the time too, but sometime I get a little ahead of myself. But remembering where I came from and how easily people gain it all back will certainly keep me in check.

PammyFl · 04-23-2010, 09:51 PM

I think we all deserve to be a little conceited after all we have accomplished. I'm not saying we should go around bragging about it but, I don't see anything wrong with feeling cocky now and again. If anything its you giving yourself a pat on the back for all you have done.

kaplods · 04-23-2010, 10:18 PM

I think you keep it in perspective the same way you keep every other acheivement and good fortune in life in perspective.

I don't think conceit, arrogance and other forms of chronic feelings of superiority are ever caused by the good fortune or by the acheivement. A person who is prone to feeling superior will always find someone to feel superior to. A balanced person may have fleeting feelings, but they also recognize that feelings of superiority are usually an illusion. There are always people less and more talented, motivated, and "lucky."

I think you only have to address the issue if you're hurting someone (and that includes yourself) because of the feelings.

Glory87 · 04-23-2010, 10:57 PM

I am both humble and conceited about my weight loss, varies by the day, my mood, the phase of the moon. I know I did a hard thing that few people do, which is awesome and deserves some back patting (I mean, it's no cure for cancer, or Everest climb, but it will do!)

energie · 04-23-2010, 11:54 PM

Yeah, I dont think its anything wrong with feeling a little conceited as long as its not meant to put another down.

Me- I just feel more confident and ready to take on the day. I rarely ever feel that "conceited feeling" you speak of, honestly.

Emily · 04-24-2010, 12:13 AM

The most humbling thing for me is the fact is that I did the damage to myself, and many people manage to get through their whole lives without gaining a superfluous 150+ lbs. Whenever I want to shout my loss from the rooftops, I remember that, and suddenly, I don't want to shout it from the rooftops anymore--LOL.

srmb60 · 04-24-2010, 05:37 AM

I'm kinda in Emily's camp. I do have moments when I think "yes! I look good!" But ... when I didn't look good ... that was my doing too.
And ... I've regained before and I have no pride in that.

Shmead · 04-24-2010, 07:26 AM

My thing is that when I get compliments, I don't want to sound smug or conceited, but I also don't want to deprecate my accomplishment. So I just say "thank you. It's been a long year" or something like that. But I have such complicated emotions about this whole process that any simple statement seems like a lie--there's no simple way to sum up this experience! But I know dang well that people don't want to hear all that.

unidestiny · 04-24-2010, 08:14 AM

I believe you have the right to be really proud of what you've accomplished and I wouldn't say that just because you're thinking such thoughts you've become arrogant. If no one's there to compliment you, you have to be the one telling yourself to love your body, right?

The difference probably lies in whether you merely think it, or you voice it out. And if you start giving nasty comments about another person's weight, then you've truly become a little too conceited.

rockinrobin · 04-24-2010, 08:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily

The most humbling thing for me is the fact is that I did the damage to myself, and many people manage to get through their whole lives without gaining a superfluous 150+ lbs. Whenever I want to shout my loss from the rooftops, I remember that, and suddenly, I don't want to shout it from the rooftops anymore--LOL.

Yes, I feel this way as well. In fact years ago, when I lost the weight and in fact wasn't even at *goal* yet and everyone started complementing me, the first thing I always said was, "it was a long time in coming".

But I kinda took the original question to be more about being conceited instead of humbled. I don't think they're the same.

But for some reason I equate conceited-ness with being vain to some extent.

I think vanity is a GOOD thing. It's something I lost along the way, otherwise I never would have allowed myself to get up to 287 lbs at 5 foot nothing.

I lost my vanity. My *looks* didn't matter to me,certainly not enough. I mean I HATED how I looked, but not enough to make a change.

Well, I lost the weight for health purposes, but lo and behold I re-discovered my vanity along the way (and never, ever want to lose it again - it's a maintenance tool in fact!). And like I said, I think that's a good thing. There's nothing wrong with feeling good about the way you look. And I DO feel good about the way I look. I don't let it get to me too much (LOTS of compliments I get) because by no means do I look gorgeous. I've got a whole new slew of wrinkles, my eyes are still just plain brown, my nose is too round, I'm still too short, yada, yada, yada. But nonetheless I am THRILLED with how I look. I'm the best me that I can be. And that feels fabulous. And it translates to me having more confidence and a better attitude towards everything - my work, my friendships, my dealings with strangers, my family, how I keep my household, paying my bills, my everything...

Ready2ShedLBS · 04-25-2010, 04:56 PM

Geez I havent been on these boards is 2 years. But.. I feel like coming from where Ive been and the hard work and dedication I put into my body that I deserve every compliment I get or the stares. I put in an extreme amount of work into my body and how I eat, nothing was "given" to me, so I refuse to feel bad about feeling good about me