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Old 03-14-2010, 06:21 PM   #8
kaplods
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Wausau, WI
Posts: 13,383

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Height: 5'6"

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I'd be lying if I said never, but truly not very often. I enjoy being me (even fat me). I'm intelligent, creative, funny, and usually am comfortable and confident in most situations.

I've always been a very outgoing person though. I guess I'm a risk-taker and nonconformist at heart. I love variety in people. Even when I was a child, I was fascinated by all the ways people could be different. I thought the differences were awesome.

To some degree, I always felt far too much compassion for anyone who was "different" to feel superior. Not that it never happened, but usually it was in the more practical sense of the "heat being off me." I never liked seeing other people picked on or bullied, but it was sometimes a relief when I wasn't the most likely target (although I also had the habit of coming to the defense of anyone being bullied - where that confidence came from I don't know, but I do remember threatening bullies - they'd say "what are you going to do, sit on me," and I'd say "If I have to."

Don't get me wrong. I have had my share of "my life sucks," moments, and less than charitable thoughts about others. I wasn't always as confident as I am now - but I think the threads of self esteem and confidence were always there. For my age and situation I always had above average self esteem and confidence.

Even though my appearance should have put me on the bottom rungs of childhood to high school popularity, my quick wit and outgoing friendliness put me smack dab in the upper middle. I think really it was one part empathy and five parts my love of talking. I didn't hold grudges because I couldn't resist the need to communicate, and you can't communicate without an audience - and I didn't care who my audience was. I was just as comfortable talking with the most "popular" kids as with the "burnouts."

I think it's why I chose the field of psychology. I love learning about people's differences, and I don't tend to automatically attach value to those differences. Even when I was a probation officer, I found myself empathising more often than not with my probation clients. I could definitely imagine being in the same situation, if I'd had the same life.
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Last edited by kaplods; 03-14-2010 at 10:10 PM.
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