This thread is so inspiring to me. I stumbled across it accidentally, and I just wanted to let everyone know how amazing I think it is. I love the lists, and I'm very glad that they were shared.
I am new here - this is my first post. I am just at the point now like sweetpeach to be ready to "start" my journey to the New Me. I haven't decided on an exact plan yet, but am starting by TRYING to get in the habit of journaling and eating measured portions every few hours, as well as moving around more.
I had actually just made a short list like stephnms did, the personal negative aspects of being so big, in my Fat Journa, then I made a 2nd list in sweetcakes' style so I could post "I want to be able to . . ." notes around the house to INSPIRE myself.
I really cannot imagine a better MOTIVATIONAL TOOL than these lists! I am printing out the parts that really strike home with me to add more colorful Notes around the house for me - Thank you all. The weight tickers can show pounds or sizes lost, and we can also start crossing off some things on the Why I Hate Being Fat list, and start higlighting/adding things to our How Weight Loss Has Changed My Life list!!
I am so thankful for finding this forum :-).
Lu
1. Being pinch-run for in softball games because I'm slow
2. Being uncomfortable on planes
3. Avoiding photos at special events
4. Un-tagging photos that make me cringe on facebook
5. Low self-confidence
6. Not feeling comfortable in shorts
7. Not feeling comfortable in dresses/skirts
8. Wearing a suit of armor at the beach
9. Skipping climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge
10. Muffin tops/cellulite
11. Shopping in plus size stores
12. Not being able to wear high boots
13. Having an "X" in my top size
14. Skipping sky diving because of my weight
15. Being unable to wear heels for any length of time
16. Hating the way I look naked
17. Worrying I didn't get a job because of my weight
18. Always being the funny friend, not the love interest
19. Lying on my driver's license
20. Not wanting to wear tank tops or sleeveless shirts
21. Having less cute winter coats to choose from
22. Trouble finding tourist t-shirts in my size when I travel
23. Being out of shape for basketball
24. Inability to do even 1 "real" push-up
25. Being made fun of by jerks
26. Being the butt of jokes in the media, movies, etc.
27. Not fitting in Victoria's Secret
28. Having to just "browse" in 99% of Los Angeles clothing stores
29. Being afraid to go horseback riding for fear of hurting the horse
30. Not being able to dress like Xena for Halloween
31. Buying wide shoes
32. Avoiding reunions because I'm embarrassed I'm fat
33. Never finding the latest styles in my size
34. Having to order from the online section of Old Navy
35. Being unable to buy Nike workout clothes
36. Wearing my personal struggle externally
37. Not feeling comfortable with online dating because of my weight
38. Hating the way my fat fingers look with painted nails
39. Difficulty finding women's rings in my size
40. Difficulty finding watches that fit my wrists comfortably
41. Rude doctors
42. Having to order my t-shirts in XXL at work
43. Being fatter than my dad
44. Inability to run a 5K
45. Double-chin
46. Not going skiing in forever because of my size and flexibility
47. Being afraid to try surfing, even though I really want to
48. Not going out as much as I want to because I'm self-conscious
49. Being afraid to take up martial arts again
50. Letting my weight stop me from doing fun things
51. Not being able to be the athlete I know I am deep down
52. Never getting asked to dance at clubs
53. Feeling sore and old after softball games
54. Feeling like the ugly sister compared to my thinner sisters
55. Thinking every ache and ailment might be diabetes
56. Paying more for uglier clothing
57. Feeling self-conscious during sex
58. Avoiding the doctors office because they're usually rude
59. Not traveling as much as I would if I were thinner
60. Letting my weight overshadow all of my good qualities.
1. Clothing. Just...clothing. I have an eye for fashion and I am stuck in t-shirt and jeans. Just too big for cute stuff all around! Even some Torrid items make me look heinous.
2. Shoes. Hello duckfeet. ugh
3. Skin. Its just so stretched out. And being brown? Very visibly so.
4. I have to walk up and down stairs like a much older woman at 27.
5. ^The crackling knees that dont let me forget that.
6. Lying. Just on the internet, but still. People ask me what I look like? "Now, where did I put that photo of the hot chick with tattoos..." Pathetic. And Facebook got me caught. XD
7. Family members. "I want to see you thin before I die, daughter."
8. Underachieving...I feel like my weight destroyed my confidence in just about everything else. Not good for an illustrator.
9. The depression is horrible. Waking up every day like “Yep. Still fat”.
10. “Picking” at my body a lot. Not literally though I do have eczema. I mean grabbing the fat all the time and wanting to cry. Grabbing it like I could magically pull it off.
11. Dry skin. Feh
12. My legs looking like this >< I dont know if it's fat build up on the inner thighs and knees but I hate the way it makes my legs look like they are buckling in the middle.
13. Ankles. I dont have “cankles” but they are wide. I'd like to wear boots, please.
14. BIGGEST CALVES EVER.
15. Skinny friends and the feeling I get of pure, white hot, steaming rage when they cry about gaining 5 pounds.
16. Being the fat friend ,at that. The sidekick when we have equal personality and talent.
17. Users and abusers from past relationships due to weight.
18. The worn hole in every pair of pants I have ever owned. You know the one...upper, inner thighs?
19. Do I even have a neck?
20. Kangaroo pouch under chin. Soon to be a double chin.
21. Falling. My balance is crap.
22. Creating beauty and not being beauty.
23. Menstruation cycles that last 6 months. Tons of fun to bleed that long.
24. Pre diabetes. I'm sure I'm getting there.
25. Drinking to drown the misery.
26. Eating to drown the misery.
27. Smoking to deny the anxiety and discomfort from the misery.
28. Smack talkers. The first thing they can manage to come up with as an insult is “Well UH....your fat!”
29. People equating thinness with health, success (even when they are drop-outs who shoot heroin. I kid you not.)
30. People equating fatness with death, lazyness, lack of impulse control, stupidity. I am not stupid. I work hard, actually.
31. Always being the one to blame since people associate negative personality traits with higher weight.
32. The humiliation of an OBVIOUS wing man trying to pry me from a friend and his homie so I dont get in the way. Kiss my grits, dude.
33. Apparently you can only be opinionated or frank if you are “pretty”. Otherwise you are insecure and making up for something.
34. Raaaaaashes. Stinky ones.
35. Hygiene. For me its mostly the constant period that trips me up. But the one thing I notice are dirty backs-of-legs. Its hard to reach there, but at least it does not smell/isnt noticeable.
36. Creating beauty as an artist, feeling like the beast.
37. Feeling not unlike a sexless lump. Am I female? Are you only a “woman” at a certain weight to many people? Sadly, yes. Especially in the case of “chicks”. Unless they take a 'Fat' to the front.
38. No idea how to walk in heels due to weight. Never worn them for more than 30 seconds.
39. Sadness. At the “unfairness” of it all.
40. The rage that surfaces when I think of how I would have been wholly accepted a hundred or so years ago.
41. “If you lost weight, you'd be a knock out.”
42. “Whoa your breasts are huge!” Person then begins to fondle or even lay on them shamelessly. Excuse me...do they do this to smaller/smaller breasted women? No. They would be punched. Which leads me to--
43. Simple. Doo-daa. Human respect. As a person on two legs. I deserve it as much as the next person.
44. Being accused of “jealousy” if any altercation with a thinner woman happens.
45. Feeling like a circus attraction at family events.
46. And concerts.
47. And parks
48. Parties too.
49. Smoking. I only smoke to stop myself from over eating. Keeping my mouth busy. I need to stop, its not like it works! I've smoked for years!
50. Trying to stop smoking...and overeating.
51. Feeling like an embarrassment.
52. People throwing things at me from cars or yelling “Big girl!”
53. Speaking of which...creepers. Chubby chasers. Adipose tissue fetishists. Oh god.
54. Speaking of which, seeing big people like me in love and somehow -still- feeling like I am far too monstrous to be accepted or adored.
55. Flabby arms. I'll fly away, oh lordy.
56. Flabby thighs. Got cargo pockets at the tops of my thighs.
57. Legs going numb when walking or standing for more than 20 minutes. Right on the outsides.
58. No energy what-so-ever. Sedentary? Bad. But the motivation and energy to not be so? Doesn't want to exist. And I know it needs to.
59. Excuses.
60. Isolation
61. Being a night owl just to avoid being seen. (I am a real sucker for moonlight though.)
62. Anger. So angry all the time.
63. Wanting so much hot ink...too misshapen to do it on places other than arms, legs or what...face? No thanks.
64. All the characters I create seem to be an image of who I want to be/should have been. I draw so many pretty women.
65. Wanting impossible things: Weight loss surgery for one.
66. Speaking of pretty women “Dont you want to look like one of your characters?”
67. The pity. I dont need it.
68. Seeing those who have made it and then hearing the still, small voice in my head say “Thats not possible for you. You know that right? Quit dreaming.”
69. “Big boned”, “heavy”, “rubenesque”. Stop trying to spare my feelings. I am -fat-.
70. The seat belts in the back seats of cars? Yeah. Boobs-and-stomach dont permit that.
71. The hypocrisy within me. Hating shallow people to death and yet wanting to be on the positive side of their reactions.
72. Seeing old girlfriends or boyfriends. :/ “Wow Les, put on some Lbs didnt ya?” When no, I did not. Just still fat. Thanks for the super ****ty way of letting me in on this little secret.
73. Having to sleep on my stomach because my oversized breasts literally want to drown my chin.
74. Side boobs.
75. Not being able to put my arms at my sides comfortably without “Hugging the bowl”
76. “When is your baby due?” >=[
77. Being the most qualified, not getting the job. You get one guess why.
78. Catching myself thinking of lies to tell a guy I'm close to over a,) Why I wont meet him in person for a year or longer. (funny how that coincides with my weight loss goal DERP) b.) What I will say about my loose skin. c.) “No thats not me in the photo”. d.) Keeping mum and angry on the occasion he goes on and on about “Fat people needing to take responsibility, etc, etc”
79. Being inspired to work out and just laying there in abject sadness.
80. Short hair making my head look like a pumpkin. Reason number one I fear getting those horribly coveted dreads I long for.
81. Stomach sticks out farther than rather large breasts.
82. Agricanthis Negrosis. Darkened patches of skin in the worst places. Very pronounced on a black female.
83. Being accused of being the token fat black welfare queen. Aside from the obvious racism, I have never been on welfare and no not have children.
84. Folks thinking I am 35 instead of 27.
85. “Michelle/Sandra/Becky is a big girl too. You guys should get along.”
86. The assumption that fat =desperate and easy. Actually yes, I do have a type.
87. Clothing catching in folds
88. Eating ANYTHING and getting dirty looks. Dude, this is an apple...lay off!
89. Shame. So much of it. Goes hand in hand with the eFibs.
90. Subconscious envy of people who have lost weight
91. Every health problem chalked up to weight.
92. Suicidal tendencies. Lucky I have a bit too much drive to do this graphic novel to drink the Kool-Aid.
93. Fear of trying new things due to weight.
94. “When I get skinny, I'll “__________”
95. Not being able to dance anymore.
96. Waddling.
97. Not being eligible for insurance.
98. Not being eligible to expatriate to most countries.
99. Bras never fitting/quad boob/stretching to the supper of paper handkerchiefs.
100. Not being able to remember being thin. I know I was small until I was nine or so...I have no I idea what it felt like anymore. I just forgot. Sometimes I wonder if it really happened.
Steph..great reasons and great on your 17 Lbs loss so far!! Your list will drop and Stay strong!
My main reason on losing weight, which most of your listed already..but my main concern is my depressing facial hair..ugh!! I sure hope as my weight drops, annoying facial hair will be gone!!
I can identify with you there. I have the fat girl's "Crustache" above my lips just like a pubescent young lad. People don't notice it, but I do. I've micro-epilated it electronically a few times and thought I looked much better. I also get that one chin hair that seems to have a hidden spool beneath the skin! You yank or tweez and it somehow has unfurled to half an inch!
What up with that!?
Last edited by Nebuchadnezzar; 10-16-2010 at 11:37 PM.
Reason: Misspelled a few things like a true genius...
Just felt the need to bump this thread...it inspired me the first time I read it...I just did a search to find it again because I love reading through these lists
a funny thing happened to me while reading this post....at first, i was like...wow...this hits sooooooooooooooo close to home....each number i read, i was like, yes....Yes....YEs....YES....YESSSSSSSSSS....and as i read each NEGATiVE list...i felt worse and worse...my eyes starting to tear up....i began to cry....even though i was so able to relate to each and every one of them....by the time i had gotten to 100...i was sobbing, bawling like a baby...wondering who, what, when, where why...HOW....did i let myself get to this point???????
THEN......
i started reading sweetcakes....
and as i was reading each POSiTiVE one on the list....through the glistening tears...something inside happened....i wiped my nose....sat up taller in my chair...straightened my back, squared my shoulders...and thought...I WANT TO BE LiKE THAT!!!!!!! i WiLL be like that!!!
THANK YOU ... FOR THiS iNSPiRiNG, EYE OPENiNG, iNTiMiDATiNG yet EMPOWERiNG....POST!!
it has certainly moved me....i will persevere....in spite of every negative numbered item....i will press onward....steadfastly....because of the 100 POSiTiVE REASONS....i will now make for msyelf....
To me, it's just such a powerful combination...all the reasons I want to lose weight followed by all the wonderful things I'm working towards...Thanks again to the original posters
for those of you that havent reached your goal or are just starting out, can i challenge you to a list of 100 things you love about yourself? you dont have to be defined by your pants. it hurts my heart to read these. im sure you have so many wonderful things about you!!!!
