Does your weight make you feel older?

milliondollarbbw · 03-06-2010, 12:10 AM

Other than some of the aches and pains that can occur with those of us who are in the 300lbs. and above, does anyone else ever feel like their weight is making them feel older?

I feel like even when I improve how I dress, I still have that matronly look going on. I have also found that because of my weight, and because I can't always buy and find the type of clothes I like in my size, I get left out of more fashion and style related discussions in certain groups, even though I am the same age of those in the conversation. It is like they just don't think to talk to me about that, because? what? I can't dress that way? It may seem weird, but I have found that those that have the fashion and healthy diet discussions seem to be a lot closer to each other than others.

I feel like my weight is making me older. I don't get looked at like I used to...it is like once I got over 300lbs, I don't get looked at anymore, even when I am looking nice.

I also feel like I have lost a lot of my physical fitness and that may come across when I am stiff after walking a few blocks, etc.

Anyone else feel the same?

mariamherrera · 03-06-2010, 12:16 AM

I feel your pain! For a long time I was in the beauty industry I was a hair stylst so I of all people KNEW about fashion, the latest trends. etc.. and still some people would act as if I knew nothing about how to look nice..

but for the most part I did have and still have a lot of people turn to me for fashion/ hair advice.. and I always dress very trendy and have my hair and make up nice.. So I wont complain much

patchworkpenguin · 03-06-2010, 12:32 AM

When I was in my 30's I weighed close to 270. I felt like I couldn't do anything active. Mostly it was fear of injuring something, coupled with being self-conscience about my body. I lost 70lbs through diet and exercise, and now that I'm in my 40's I'm much more active and feel younger than when I was in my 30's.

sweetcakes736 · 03-06-2010, 12:33 AM

Slower, maybe but not older. To me age is just a number, your state of mind however, dictates how you see yourself, how you see others, and how they see you.

Great news is for each step we take forward we are changing every avenue of our life. And exercise makes us look and feel younger.

Ev2 · 03-06-2010, 02:02 AM

I feel older i think. I look at others my age and it seems they are out there living more. a large part of that is my insecurity not my weight, though my insecurity is caused by my weight. I tend to shelter myself.. my display picture it the first picture I have willingly allowed to be taken of me in years. my low self esteem has cause me to not do the things in life I want to be doing.

JustSharing83 · 03-06-2010, 03:13 AM

Yes, I can relate. I am 26 but I feel at least 10 years older. I dress very conservatively in order to hide every little imperfection so my clothes are not "young". My feet and back hurt a lot and I tire quickly. I also have wrinkles, varicose veins, and a small streak of white hair (still small enough to pluck, lol) so those don't help me feel my age!

dgramie · 03-06-2010, 10:35 AM

I agree weight sure made me feel older. It made it harder for me to do things. I sure feel younger since losing weight, cant wait to lose the rest and see how young I feel. I have even had people tell me I look younger since losing weight.

Tex · 03-06-2010, 05:04 PM

Feeling older was actually my 'A-HA' moment. I've always been very active despite my weight, but after a long walk up and down Main Street in town we were visiting for the weekend I felt like I could barely move. Once I sat down on the couch it was literally painful for me to get back up and go to the bathroom. Once I was up and moving it got better, but for several steps I felt extremely stiff and sore. I'm 36, but felt like I was 80. It was awful and I vowed then and there to make a change because I knew it would only get worse.

azcyn · 03-06-2010, 07:12 PM

I have always felt older..my whole life..even when I wasnt over weight..maybe I am an old soul

lavieboheme73 · 03-06-2010, 07:38 PM

I don't really have much trouble with that. The fact of the matter is, I dress how I want to dress and act how I want to act, regardless of the way others perceive me. It takes a little more effort to look "hip" at my size, but it can be done. I would know, because I do it. As a matter of fact, people DO come to me for fashion advice and include me in conversations about trends and fashion, especially people close to my size. Not to brag, but they want to know how I do it!

And I sure don't mind telling them!!!

That said, I don't want anyone thinking I have my head in some magic little pink cloud, because I don't. There are limitations, I'm sure not fooling myself into thinking there aren't. There are clothes I want to wear that I don't get to wear because they don't come in my size. But I've become a master at finding the closest comparable item that DOES. And there are still a lot of things I can't DO because of my size. That's the part I hate. I don't like to be left out of ANYTHING...y'all might have noticed that!

When I'm sitting on the sidelines of something I'm too big to do, that's when I feel older. I feel like someone's grandma! That really sucks.

That is honestly my biggest motivation for doing what I'm doing right now...I'm sick of making myself the one on the sidelines, so I'm putting a stop to it, one activity at a time, and, I might add, having a great time doing so!!

basketcase · 03-06-2010, 09:06 PM

I feel very old much of the time. I am a Girl Scout leader and am involved in Cub Scouts. I have a 12 year old and a 9 year old. I am 43. So, I'm already older than many of the other parents and my weight making me move slower and not want to do some the activities that the kids want to do. I don't have the fashion issues but I look forward to being able to wear jeans again! Right now I just wear knit pants.

I just want to be able to ride bikes with my kids and walk them to and from school without feeling like I'm going to die!

Enduring Infinity · 03-06-2010, 09:29 PM

I definitely do feel older because of my weight sometimes, mostly due to my physical limitations and not being able to dress the way I'd like. Even though that feeling hasn't gone away completely yet, losing the twenty pounds that I have lost has made me feel so, so, so much better physically that I'm already starting to feel younger!

I'm trying to view it as a good thing, though: if I feel old now, I can only feel younger as I get older, right?

milliondollarbbw · 03-07-2010, 11:45 PM

thank you, everybody, for helping me feel like I am not alone.

I also agree that at times I feel like an old soul.

I think that the weight and my finances does limit what I am able to wear. Also, because of my shape, it really is harder to buy clothes that both look good AND feel good when I wear them. I think I would be able to fit into a business suit, but, ya know what? I don't like how constricting they feel on my arms.

I am really hopeful that losing weight will help me to get back the level of energy I used to have. I also am tired of being winded going up a flight of stairs, or feeling achy the next day because a walked a few blocks.

neonwildflower · 03-08-2010, 12:03 AM

Definitely agree with the feeling older thing. It sucks when you want to wear something trendy or stylish but feel like even if it came in your size it couldn't possibly look as good on you. Or the stuff that does come in my size is overly long, or kind of frumpy. And I hate when I'm out with friends and my knees hurt or I'm stiff from trying to work out, and they're all limber and thin and youthful. *Sigh* Just try to keep in mind that I'm doing what I can, and I'll get there... eventually... and that which doesn't kill me will make me stronger, right? So someday if I'm able to wear that cute dress, or my knees no longer hurt, I'll have a deeper understanding than they do anyway, because I've been there.