Hi ladies and gents! I'm here! The first step, right???
I actually have been on this site before. According to my last login, it was 10/30/08. When I decided to come back today, I tried signing up brand-new, but it reminded me that I already am a member. I was hoping for a "fresh start". Plus I hate my username. Oh, well!
Do you guys mind if I introduce myself? My name is Shannon. I'm 38 years old (soon to be 39! ). I work full time as a NICU nurse. I also have a family -- Darren, darling daughter Lily (just turned 9!), and 2 adorable cockapoo doggies named Gypsy and Simon, all of whom I love beyond words. I live in a suburb of Columbus, OH with good schools, we have a decent home (though I could make a list of the stuff that needs repair/upgrading, etc!!!) and a nice, safe neighborhood. I have close family and friends nearby. All in all, I think I've created a pretty good life for myself. I'm sure I'd be described by most as a happy-go-lucky, cheerful person who's always good for a laugh. But deep inside I really feel like someone who's just watching my life from the outside.
I've been varying degrees of overweight/obese since about middle school. I was about 260lbs in my early 20s, and I actually managed to lose about 70lbs at one point by eating less than 5 fat grams a day (so dumb). I think a trip to New Orleans and splurging on all the food there was ALL it took to totally derail that weight loss and send me into gain after gain. Since then, I have gained and lost 20-40lbs a few times, but each time I manage to re-gain and pack on even more pounds than before. Right now I'm by FAR the heaviest I've ever been. I don't even know how much right now, but I know it's over 300, because I was hovering there BEFORE I went on my latest year-long binge!!! Also, we got WiiFit for Christmas, and the board told me I was too heavy to play (I imagine that happens at 300lbs ) I am going to the gym today (yep, I've been paying for the membership all this time without going), so I will weigh myself -- get real with myself -- and post when I get back.
I'm in tears right now because I feel so utterly defeated about this whole thing right now. I know I need to lose weight -- words cannot describe how much worse I feel than at ~270lbs. My knees feel all tight, I'm practically hobbling around like an arthritic 80 year old woman. I can barely even bend over to tie my shoes! It just feels so overwhelming, and how can this time really be different when I've tried so many times before?? I have all the tools I need -- a gym, a great grasp on nutrition and healthy weight loss -- why can't I just jump in and HANDLE this burden that's been with me most of my life? In all other areas, I can and do HANDLE my problems. My weight continues to get the best of me after all these years, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm watching life go by and not LIVING it!
I'm back here hoping for support, and I guess that's a start. I'll go to the gym and do a little walking on the treadmill, and I guess that's a start. Any advice for me? I promise I'm not always so down! I am just really frustrated right now (not to mention scared to death to step into the gym after all this time!!).
Hi Shannon! Welcome back. I, too, have just returned to the 3FC world and am wondering the same things you are. Why can't I just stick to it? Why when I know all the right choices, I make the wrong ones? Why can't I just get off my *** and do it?? I've made a promise to myself this year not to put things off, and one of them is to just get up and do something.
Maybe together we can support each other in our journey. Please feel free to PM me if you like. Good luck at the gym and don't over do it and injure yourself.
Oh, thank you so much for your responses! I feel better now. I went to the gym (kicking and screaming) and walked a mile on the treadmill. One good thing is my gym has the most awesome shower, so that's my treat at the end of a workout -- a shower with much better water pressure than home! I hobbled my way through it, but my ipod helped and I made it through. I think when I go back, I'm going to do a water aerobics class -- alternate between the 2. I love being in the pool -- feels great on my joints!
In a way, it's disheartening that I'm so far behind on my level of fitness than I have been in the past, but I'm going to choose to look at is as I'm glad this poor ol' bod can still walk a mile, and it only gets better from here!
I've found that it helps motivate me to set a time goal and add my numbers to the group...like I'm part of something big in a good, good way.
Congratulations on taking the first step--again, and for being able to walk a mile. That's a very good start.
Something to think about, too: While I definitely wouldn't give up my gym time if I were you, you can use wii sports (that came with the wii). It's not as aerobic as wii fit, but it will get you moving if the weather's too lousy. I used tennis before I used the fit.
Best of luck. You'll find fantastic cheerleaders here.
I remember when I was 340+ pounds, probably closer to 350 and I had finally had enough! No more false starts, no more excuses, I just dove in and did a few nutty things, including trying that Tae Bo DVD....4 minutes later I was on the ground panting and DONE lol. Walking, I remember I went for a walk and was proud of myself for making it to the end of this stretch of the street, until I noticed I had done only 5 minutes and I was utterly exhausted lol. Bravo for a mile!
We all have those moments were we need to start fresh, even ON our journeys. I mean sometimes I just need to shake all the nonsense and excuses right off of me and get back to it! I recently did that and am now going through the CRAVINGS and things because I wasn't taking proper care of myself, inside and out.
Wow! You girls will probably never realize how just a few nice, encouraging words from you is making me feel better. I really need to hang out here. It's inspiring to see so many people either *starting fresh* or so far into their journeys.
I like the perspective about remembering where we've been. No more denial, huh? Yes, I've tried before and never got where I wanted to go, but things were different then, and that doesn't necessarily mean I'm set up to fail again, right? I'm older now, presumably a little more mature, and really ready to just feel better!
I'm definitely going to look around here and see what all I can get involved in. At least my mind is heading in the right direction. Now to get the body to follow.
Welcome welcome welcome back! I started my journey 16 months ago and 377 pounds... I know EXACTLY how are you feeling!!!!! You know what? You CAN DO THIS!!!!!
I never ever in a million years thought I could actually lose the weight. Never. But I figured I'd try. For a year. A year is so short right? And in that year you could weigh the same, weigh MORE or weigh less! I was planning (hoping) on maybe losing 6-7 lbs a month... thinking that I would end around 75 pounds lost and maybe just maybe break 300 pounds...
and in a year? I lost 155 pounds. DID YOU HEAR THAT??? 155 pounds!!!! All because I stuck to my plan and kept my eye on the goal. I picked myself up every time I fell and I REPEATED... "this food is NOT worth giving up my goal for."
I'm in the middle of getting on track from Christmas... and my saying is helping me AGAIN!
Do you know what the difference is between succeeding in your journey and not? The willingness to get BACK ON TRACK immediately. No matter how many times it takes.
THIS WILL BE YOUR TIME!!!! And you will falter... and you will come here and we will help, and you will help yourself. And in a year? You'll be well below 300. I just know it
hugs and love... your story reminds me so much of me. I am glad to have you here
cfmama, your words and story are so inspiring!!! I really need to take to heart the part about getting back on track when I slip -- that's always been my downfall, I guess. Like I'll have a weak moment and pig out at work at a potluck or something, then I tell myself, well, I've already screwed up, so might as well order for pizza for dinner. I've had those turn into year-long binges! Matter of fact, I think I'm just coming off a year-long binge. Time to pick myself up and get back on track!
I have a couple of good days under my belt, and I'm not starving, sad, and missing bad food! I'm starting to feel better already! I think I'm going to start posting my days on the *Positive, uplifting* thread and get to know you guys better.
And I thank you all again for the encouragement. If cfmama can do it, so can I!!!
burhenns - I am SO cheering you on! I'm also an RN living near Cbus so I commend you even more for; #1 digging up the energy to go the gym, nursing is HARD work, and #2 not letting this stinking Ohio weather keep you down You should be so proud of yourself!!!!!! Keep it going and that ticker will be moving to the right in no time!
burhenns - I am SO cheering you on! I'm also an RN living near Cbus so I commend you even more for; #1 digging up the energy to go the gym, nursing is HARD work, and #2 not letting this stinking Ohio weather keep you down You should be so proud of yourself!!!!!! Keep it going and that ticker will be moving to the right in no time!
Awww, thank you so much!!!! I do a lot of times hate my poor body, but every once in a while, I am thankful that the ol' girl can still get me through some of those rigorous 12 hour shifts (just waking up to do another today, and not looking forward to driving there in the snow!!). I just recently switched to working day shift after working nights for several years, and I'm thinking that living when the rest of the world lives and not waking up from a mini-coma every day will help in my motivation to get to the gym on those days off. The last few years, when I look back, is pretty much a fog. I know some people adapt pretty well, but I never really did. I realize that now that I'm not doing it anymore!! So here's hoping the light of day helps keep me on track!
Thanks again for the kind words! I hope to see you around on here!!