When I was married, this was definitely an issue. My ex-husband is extremely body conscious and spent a significant amount of his time and energy on the shape of his body, his appearance, and his fitness. He had claimed that my far more relaxed attitude about it didn't bother him, but I believe that it did. My weight fluctuated a lot. While we were married, I lost 30 pounds (I've gained it back, now, and it still fluctuates), mainly because I was hoping to keep his attention. The obsession on the body was no good for romance and our sex life was terrible because he was not attracted to me. By the time our marriage ended (keep in mind, I'd lost 30 pounds), I think he felt so much resentment about being with someone overweight that he couldn't even see that my figure had changed, and he made no efforts to hide his contempt. My troubled self-esteem probably did not help our potential sex life; however, his response to my body also did not help my self-esteem.
The man I'm seeing now loves the heck out of my curves and my sex drive. However, I think I'm too heavy. There are some moves that are just easier and less likely to make you self-conscious when you're thinner. So, I've been thinking about this topic from a practical perspective, myself, lately -- both about trying to get fit again (losing 10-15 would be awesome!) and about how to try handle positions at my current weight
11/10 (194). 6/11 (188). 7/11 (178). 11/11 (165). 1/12 (174). 3/12 (175). 4/12 (172). 5/12 (178). Now: 7/14 I'm 188.
Mini-Goal 1: (-10 pounds = 178) --
Mini Goal 2: (-20 pounds = 168) --
Goal Weight: (-23 pounds = 165) --
Eventual Goal Weight: 150 -- someday
Last edited by neon_zephyr : 07-08-2014 at 06:15 PM.