I took your friend's comments as slightly sarcastic but not malevolent. I am guessing that she is the type of friend that would reply positively if you told her what kind of comments/actions would be deemed helpful in your weight-loss journey. Good luck!
We give social networks waaaaaay more power than they deserve... that being said, I agree with the others in that I don't believe your friend was trying to be rude. In fact, the best of friends are the ones that tell you what you NEED to hear, not what you WANT to hear. Chin up and bake them brownies with pride, knowing that they don't own you and you don't have to eat the whole pan! (then bring me one =) )
And in the end most of the brownies are gone.. LOL.. Fiance managed to snatch a few and the others weer given away to friends and co-workers.. I however did delete the posting the Facebook, because no matter how it was meant, it still was hurtful to me and if I left it there I would've just kept thinking about it.. So it's gone.. BYEBYE!
I agree with some of the other posts about opening yourself to comments as soon as you announce your intentions in a public way. Unfortunately I myself did thia by announcing to coworkers that I was trying to lose weight. Now a few seem to think that gives them free reign to comment on everything I do or do not eat, exercise habits and general comments about how I should try to do something else someone else has had sucess with. While I generally try to attribute this to them thinking they're being helpful, it does become quite irritating! Take pride in knowing you're making a change for yourself and let the results speak for themselves.
facebook sucks!..I like the games more than the friends People tend to say things on there that they probably wouldn't say to your face. Posting at the end of the week that you lost __ pounds and ate brownies will let her know you can lose weight and have a brownie.
I learned a long time ago not to announce that I am on a diet. That announcement brings out the Diet Police every time and they will make comments on everything you eat .
I don't see where she was being unsupportive or hateful - i *probably* would have said the same thing. The fact that you got so upset about it leads me to believe that your conscience is telling you to be wary of the chocolate monster lol. it's ok, have a brownie - just don't over indulge. I don't see a reason for responding back to her last post either. I think if you push the issue it'll just cause more problems with your friend.
You're better off just keeping your diet off of a FB. Though, I would post your losses so they can celebrate your wins
I dunno.. if you made your intentions about weight-loss known and then you talk about brownies, I'd consider someone who brought up the conflict of interest here to be a real friend to me.
The only thing I disliked about the person's messages was the frequent use of the word "lol"... if she were a bit more serious about it, I'd take it a bit more seriously and less like an insult, but ultimately I can see how reading that sort of thing would be disheartening and maybe even somewhat painful.
Bottom line: If you don't want commentary on this sort of thing, I think you have to keep it to yourself, because it's human nature for people to chime in and put two-and-two together.
It's funny to me that there's a big point missing here...SO WHAT?
It's only ironic because we've been taught to think that there are "good" foods and "bad" foods and if you commit to eating "good," then you can't have anything "bad."
I eat healthy and it includes things other people think I shouldn't eat if I'm really trying to eat healthy.
Eat what you want. Being healthy means having a healthy attitude as well. Brownies aren't demon spawn. They have more sugar and calories than other foods considered to be healthy. As long as you're being healthy in the way that you want, everyone else can go fly a kite. Your response to your friend should be, "I'm eating healthy, that includes brownies. Sue me." You could be making super low calorie, sugarless brownies for all they know.
But in general I'd agree with everyone else that posting on FB is a bad idea, simply because most people are inclined to joke about things and make comments in passing, not discuss serious issues or things that make them feel vulnerable.
The Diet Police are the #1 reason I haven't said anything on Facebook. My boyfriend knows what I'm doing because he lives with me and is super supportive. My best friend knows because she is also losing weight (she's lost 60 pounds already!), and she knows an occasional treat is perfectly fine. She's the one who taught me a lot of the basics and pointed me toward some helpful websites.
My family doesn't know because they've always been so overly-critical and negative in the past. My mother actually suggested weight loss surgery a year ago, and it led to a huge argument with tears and all kinds of drama. Ugh.
If I tell people what I'm doing, they'll expect results in X amount of time and get all annoying if I'm not size X by summer, etc. Since I haven't told anyone, I can look forward to hearing things like, "Have you lost weight? You look smaller!" I'd rather have that element of surprise than have everyone policing my actions.
Bottom line: find a support group that you can trust to truly *support* you and don't tell anyone else. You'll save yourself a lot of stress that way. /hugs
People tend to say things on there that they probably wouldn't say to your face. Posting at the end of the week that you lost __ pounds and ate brownies will let her know you can lose weight and have a brownie.
