Being that I have no children, I thought I'd seek the advice of the parents on the board. A friend of mine is recently divorced and was awarded joint custody of his two kids on Monday-Tuesdays every week. He lives close to their school but the problem is that he has to be to work at 7 and his kids dont start school til 8. The past few weeks his boss has been letting him come in an hour late but the higher ups found out and told him no more. So he's been trying to find someone that can watch his kids for that hour. No one is able to do it. I called the school for him to see if they had a morning latchkey program or something where he could drop them off early but they pulled that program last year. I asked them if they knew of anything else and they were rude and said NO. So ... do any of the parents on here have suggestions as to what else he could try? The local YMCA has a program but it doesnt involved getting the kids to school so ... that was out too. He doesnt know any of the parents at the kids new school ... because I suggested he talk to one of the parents. The only other thing I thought was to talk with the kids teacher and mention it to her and maybe she knew of a parent in the class that could help. I dunno ... any other suggestions? Thanks!
Check local daycares, esp the better ones. The day care I used was 6 am to 6 pm, and runs pick up and drop off bus service to several of the surrounding elementary schools for the school-agers. Some are strictly a 5-day-a-week thing, but others will work with you.
Don't the kids have any friends that live nearby where he could drop them at 7? I know many parents here do that. Also, most schools allow children to be dropped up to 30 minutes before school begins.
Also, he should check area daycares. Most daycares do a van drop off at the schools in the morning. In this economy, I am willing to bet one of those daycares near him would be willing to drop his kids for him. I would even bet they would reduce rates if this is the ONLY need he has.
I would first though, check with the friends that live close by. Maybe even agree to some sort of swap--exchang a couple of hours of weekend babysitting with parent that was willing to get his kids to school.
I have found stay at home mom's on Craigslist.org that will come over for a small fee & take my kids to school. Thankfully my husband is in security so could run background checks, but if he interviews he may be able to find a good fit.
As a parent, I would call the school back and DEMAND to talk to someone who can help, even if it's the school administrator. Don't let these kids fall through the cracks of school bureaucracy! Perhaps you got the wrong person on a bad day, and the next may be more helpful. I doubt he is the only parent at the school that has this problem.
As a parent, I would call the school back and DEMAND to talk to someone who can help, even if it's the school administrator. Don't let these kids fall through the cracks of school bureaucracy! Perhaps you got the wrong person on a bad day, and the next may be more helpful. I doubt he is the only parent at the school that has this problem.
He actually did call back and talked with the principal who told him that they could not refer him to a daycare, etc because its a liability if something happens at the daycare that they could come back and sue the school for referring them. ( Grrr )
He's going in tonight after class is dismissed to talk to the teacher ... hopefully she'll know of someone in the classroom possibly that is a stay at home mom or someone that would be willing to help him out for just that hour in the morning.
Thanks to everyone's suggestions, I'll pass them along to him.
As a parent, I would call the school back and DEMAND to talk to someone who can help, even if it's the school administrator. Don't let these kids fall through the cracks of school bureaucracy! Perhaps you got the wrong person on a bad day, and the next may be more helpful. I doubt he is the only parent at the school that has this problem.
?How is this the school's responsibility that he should demand it from them? The child is not falling through the cracks of school bureaucracy, he's falling through the cracks of his parents' lives.
?How is this the school's responsibility that he should demand it from them? The child is not falling through the cracks of school bureaucracy, he's falling through the cracks of his parents' lives.
Let me just say that I didn't say it was the school's responsibility .. someone else did .. HOWEVER I would ASSUME they would try to help atleast by letting him know any other options that they are aware of like programs before school etc etc. With that being said, even though these are not my kids I take offense to you saying they are falling through the cracks of their parents lives. My friend is a hard working father ... in today's economy you are LUCKY to have a good job ... any job at all for that matter. Sure he'd love to just say " to heck with work, ill stay home for that hour " but he could lose his job if he doesn't take care of this. What happens to the kids then when the father ( the primary FiNANCIAL support ) loses his job?? These kids are only in 1st and 2nd grade. He is doing what he can to try to make this all work. They are NOT slipping through the cracks of his life. He is trying to provide for them WHILE making something work in the morning so he doesn't lose his job. he doesn't have family to lean on like most of us do. Yes I know there are a lot of single parents out there with similar situations ... andt he point of this post was to get suggestions on what else he could look into. I'm almost sorry that I even posted this with a reply like that.
To those of you that took the time to suggest something instead of judge - thank you.
Smillette -
I know it is hard to be a single parent with kids, DH & I don't have DSS at our house all the time and their are two of us, we still juggle with work schedules, school schedules, day care, etc. I hope your friend can find a resource - there are single parent support groups that spring up on places like MeetUp or Craigs list in some areas, though use caution with anyone you find like that. Like Julie, I don't agree that it is the schools responsibility to take care of this situation, but like you, I feel like the school should be a resource. When I was in high school I drove two kids to band practice and back every day with me - their mom called the school and asked for help, said her kids would have to drop out if their wasn't someone who could drive them. My band director found me and asked me to help out. We wouldn't have had that link without him. Try the kids teachers, they may know some parents who could help. It is sad to me that the school system can't recommend a daycare center out of worries of liability...
Like some people have said, daycare centers often will transport kids to school - that is why I was asking the ages. DSS's daycare buses to the elementary schools, but not the middle or high school. They let you drop off as early as 6:30 then they handle the school transport, both to and from school actually - they will pick them up and bring them back to the daycare for pickup by 6:30 pm.
Jobs are starting earlier and ending later more and more these days, DH's ex has had 12 hour shifts in the past, now she starts at 7 am. In the past when she had to go to work before the daycare opened DH would go pick up DSS and take him to daycare when it opened. I know that they are divorced, but could the mother be a resource to help out on these two days? Non traditional I know, but DH & his ex have had some success with this kind of cooperation.
Good luck to him.
ETA - has he asked about flex hours during the rest of the week to make up for the time on Monday & Tuesday? I figure he has to get out early those days as well to pick them up? Moms get flex hours a lot faster than Dads, but it has been known to happen.
Last edited by Shannon in ATL; 10-13-2009 at 02:19 PM.
Let me just say that I didn't say it was the school's responsibility .. someone else did .. HOWEVER I would ASSUME they would try to help atleast by letting him know any other options that they are aware of like programs before school etc etc. With that being said, even though these are not my kids I take offense to you saying they are falling through the cracks of their parents lives. My friend is a hard working father ... in today's economy you are LUCKY to have a good job ... any job at all for that matter. Sure he'd love to just say " to heck with work, ill stay home for that hour " but he could lose his job if he doesn't take care of this. What happens to the kids then when the father ( the primary FiNANCIAL support ) loses his job?? These kids are only in 1st and 2nd grade. He is doing what he can to try to make this all work. They are NOT slipping through the cracks of his life. He is trying to provide for them WHILE making something work in the morning so he doesn't lose his job. he doesn't have family to lean on like most of us do. Yes I know there are a lot of single parents out there with similar situations ... andt he point of this post was to get suggestions on what else he could look into. I'm almost sorry that I even posted this with a reply like that.
To those of you that took the time to suggest something instead of judge - thank you.
I did not judge. I am quite sure he is doing the very best he can. It is still true that the children *are* falling through the cracks in their parents' lives. That is where the cracks are. That doesn't mean the parents have done something wrong. But that *is* where the cracks are. That is all I have said. While I think it would be fantastic if the school solves the problem, I think it's offensive to tell him to call and *demand* they solve his problem. Therefore I was pointing out to that poster that the child is not falling through cracks in the *school's* system, as she said.
I did not judge. I am quite sure he is doing the very best he can. It is still true that the children *are* falling through the cracks in their parents' lives. That is where the cracks are. That doesn't mean the parents have done something wrong. But that *is* where the cracks are. That is all I have said. While I think it would be fantastic if the school solves the problem, I think it's offensive to tell him to call and *demand* they solve his problem. Therefore I was pointing out to that poster that the school did not create the problem, as she said.
Understood. I see where you are coming from now with that explanation. I apologize if I came off a bit abrasive in that last post ... I am just very protective of people who really are trying their very best to provide for their children in tough situations, ya know?
He should start with the parent's of the kiddos' friends. He may not know them but they kids can point them out. Or at least point out the friend and they can ask the friend to point out their parent. I'd try to do this after school when everyone is picking up their kids. To not put anyone on the spot (because not all SAHM want to babysit), I would ask the parents IF they know of anyone who would be willing to do this for him. Offer to pay a reasonable amount (they may turn you down but he may have to pay for this service). Also start asking neighbors the same question. That would be alot easier if they could just go next door or across the street.
I also think it's an excellent idea to ask their teacher's if they know of anyone who could do this. Daycare pick up is also a great idea. And if Mom can help out then she should. Maybe there is some kind of trade off they can make. She covers that hour or so in the morning and he gives her the same amount of hours in handy work around the house or car work or whatever makes it work between the two of them.
Please let us know how it works out. My heart breaks for families in times like these. I pray it all works out soon.
Last edited by ANewCreation; 10-13-2009 at 02:47 PM.
Parents: Need suggestions Please :)
so ... that was out too. He doesnt know any of the parents at the kids new school ... because I suggested he talk to one of the parents. The only other thing I thought was to talk with the kids teacher and mention it to her and maybe she knew of a parent in the class that could help. I dunno ... any other suggestions? Thanks!
I see where you are coming from now with that explanation. I apologize if I came off a bit abrasive in that last post ... I am just very protective of people who really are trying their very best to provide for their children in tough situations, ya know? 
