One year ago today I made a life changing decision to finally take control of my weight once and for all. I had reached a point in my life that I was allowing my weight to control me. I was forgoing simple pleasures because I was so self conscious about how I looked. I avoided social situations at all costs. Simple things like going camping, going out with friends became a herculean effort. I was baffled about how much pain I was in on a daily basis. My knees were killing me, and the only shoes I could tolerate were flats. The only clothes I could wear were shapeless large size clothing. I was exhausted climbing a flight of stairs. I could not keep up in kickboxing.
The catalyst for me was when I was nominated for the Circle of Excellence at work. My worst fear was that I would win, because I would have to be filmed as part of video that would be presented at an awards dinner. The thought of my over weight face on a 12 foot screen basically sent me into a blind panic. Can you believe I actually tried to persuade my Director that I did not feel I should be nominated? They put it down to modesty. I put down to down right embarrassment. Despite (or in spite of) my protests, I won. In reality, this was a huge deal. You are essentially (among others) being recognized as one of the top employees in the company. You are wined and dined for a weekend with a final banquet at the end of it with a picture taken with the Senior VP of your area as well as the CEO. Privately, I received the news with a sinking feeling of dread. What would I wear? Could I avoid the video? Great, now I have to get my picture done. I realized that I was taking something that was meant to be a reward as a punishment. How twisted was that?
I suffered through the weekend without really taking any enjoyment in it. I look back on this now and realize how terribly sad that was (I even have a few tears in my eyes about it now today, reading that last paragraph). Enough was enough.
So, I made the commitment to myself that I needed to lose the weight. I worked with my doctor to build a plan that would work for me. I committed to staying on plan. I committed to only weighing myself at the doctor’s office and not at home. I decided that eating natural, nutritious foods had a much better long term payoff (losing weight) than the short term payoff of eating unhealthy, processed junk food and the short high I would get. I decided not to look at the total amount I had to lose, but look at what I could do in a month. One month, became two, two became three, and so on and so on.
Now a year later, this is where I am now:
*I have lost over 100 lbs *I am proud of how I look and I am now working on getting a formal picture done of myself *I kick a$$ at kickboxing and some of the black belts have to keep up with me *I can now wear high heels (see an earlier post ) and go into normal clothing stores and know that anything I pick out will fit. *I have become an inspiration to people around me *I have become an exercise junkie and I am forever challenging myself (latest passion – hot yoga) *No more pain in my knees *My self esteem is through the roof *My relationship with food has changed-for me it is now fuel for my body to enable me to do my activities, not a treat. A treat is now new shoes, new clothing, etc. *I know that people are seeing the person I was meant to be and not just the fat (not that it was the case, but I how I felt)
Those of you that know me and know I have been on this site for while know that I am not usually this verbal. However, I wanted to post some of my insights to help others on their journey.
*I thought it would take FOREVER to lose my weight. It didn’t. It was just a year-that is a drop in the bucket of my life. If I had not lost the weight, I know I would be sitting here now going why did I not just do it? *My outlook on life has changed-before I thought nothing was possible, now I know anything is possible *You can do this-for those of you just starting on your journey, know that it IS possible. Make the commitment to yourself. *Look to others for inspiration-let me mention a few ladies here who have been mine (RockinRobin, cfmama, DCHound to mention a few)
I look forward to where my life is going now, and I can not WAIT to see what is around the bend.
Incredible story, and terrific transformation. A huge congrats to you - and thanks so much for sharing. It's inspiration like this that really helps those of us barely starting out...
Care to share what your plan of action was? Type of meals and exercise?
You are an inspiration.
I really needed to read what you had to say. It's been a shot in the arm
Sadly I can completely appreciate the entire video/pictures thing. One of my great regrets is not having my picture taken & video shot with Congressman Ron Paul in 2007 because of my appearance. I was mortified that my image would end up on national news & YouTube.
I will always, always regret it.
Thank you so much for sharing your weight loss and for reminding me that 1 year really is a "drop in the bucket".
Last edited by susiemartin; 06-22-2009 at 10:51 AM.
Congradulations! This was an awesome post... a real inspiration. I think sometimes when we are bigger we don't realize just how much the weight really weighs us down. Not just physically but mentally.
*I thought it would take FOREVER to lose my weight. It didn’t. It was just a year-that is a drop in the bucket of my life. If I had not lost the weight, I know I would be sitting here now going why did I not just do it?
This part hit home for me. I don't want to have that regret of "why didn't I?" I want my life back.
You are an inspiration as you already know. Thank you for sharing your story. It touched me and made me cry and reminded me why I am doing this.
Congratulations ! A fantastic story. I understand about the pictures . I have no " before " pictures as i would not have my picture taken when I was at my highest weight. I wish I had some, now. I would love to see the comparison.
By the way , your story is so well written , I think it is good enough to be published in a health magazine.
That's so awesome! Thank you for sharing, because for me this is really timely. Just last night I was journaling about where I want to be this time next year and I was being pretty cautious and conservative about my goals. It's amazing to see how much of a difference a year can make. You've inspired me to go back and revise those suckers to challenge myself and aim higher.
Amazing. Just amazing what a turn around one can make in one short years time.
Your story is SO inspirational and so thrilling that I've literally got chills reading it. And boy could I relate to it. Such a shame that things that are meant to be joyous have to turn into dread and loathing because of the way we look and FEEL. Such dreadful memories. And it doesn't have to be that way. IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY. And for you - it no longer is - yay!!
I'm going to PM Sandi and ask her to Sticky your post so that hundreds of others can read and be inspired by your wonderful post. Just imagine how many people can benefit from it and hopefully realize that they too can transform their lives.
Congratulations on an INCREDIBLE accomplishment. And I know 1 year from now we'll be reading about "2 years ago from today.........." Because I know, you're not going back to "that other life". Nu-uh. No way.
One year ago today….
) and go into normal clothing stores and know that anything I pick out will fit.
Thank you for sharing your story! AWESOME job you have done taking back your quality of life!!!
